Gorgeous & Alone Seeking: No One. She Wants To Be Alone.
Ten minutes early? Check. Transmitter turned on? Check. Dr. Clément? Um, no check.
I stood at the front of the classroom as people started to wander in, waiting. I tapped my foot. Crossed my arms. Huffed. I played with my hickory-colored cashmere scarf, shifting it in repetition left and right against my neck. It was so super soft, and it calmed me to feel it against my skin. I tugged at my cardigan, pulling my hands into the sleeves. Played with the hem of my army green belted tunic.
I was sweating in places I didn’t want to be sweating. My palms, the backs of my knees. I rubbed the back of my neck. I set the transmitter on the podium as he walked into the room.
“It’s on the podium,” I said, passing him on the stairs.
Not stopping, he asked, “What is on the podium?”
I looked at him with wide eyes. “The transmitter,” I said.
“Ah, yes. Oui, oui, oui.” He nodded as he picked up the device and put it over his head.
Okay, well at least he was wearing it. This was a start. This was a good start.
Hudson walked into the classroom as I turned on the earpiece, covering it as best I could with my hair. He scanned the room as he set his bag down on the table near Clément’s podium. He mouthed hey and gave me a small wave. I gave him a small wave back. He looked adorable in that navy-and-red-plaid button-down.
I was looking at my notebook, flipping to the next empty page, when I heard the rustle of the transmitter against Clément’s shirt. Okay, here we go.
“Bonjour?”
My head shot up as I ripped the earpiece from my ear; his booming voice came through way too loud and way too clear. He was holding the transmitter to his mouth like a microphone.
“Today’s lesson will be—”
Hudson jumped up to gently take the transmitter from Clément’s hand and rest it against his chest.
“Oh. Right.” Clément looked at me and then back to Hudson.
Oh. My. God. I sank into my chair, wanting to crawl out of my skin. Paris. Paris. Paris. A few people seated nearby looked in my direction, silently questioning what was going on.
“Bon, on y va!” Dr. Clément said, the transmitter safely against his chest, moving forward like nothing had happened.
I waited until I was sure no one was watching before I slipped the earpiece back onto my ear. I looked up at Hudson as I patted my hair over it. He bit his bottom lip as he watched me, his knee bouncing under the table.
It was distracting, but all I could do was stare back until he looked away. What was he doing? Why was he watching me like that? Even with Dr. Clément in my ear I still couldn’t concentrate on the lecture.
* * *
The campus center was almost always packed. Clubs met there. Student government met there. There was a theater on the second floor and a cafeteria on the other side of the wall from where we sat. A near-constant stream of people went up and down the stairs, either up to the club offices on the second floor or down to the professors’ offices in the basement.
“I can’t concentrate here,” I whispered to Serena, pulling her attention away from Michael, boyfriend/volleyball teammate. “And I really need to study for this French quiz. I bombed the last one. Like, seriously bombed it.”
The three of us met twice a week for lunch, and sometimes we could get a smidge of work done if Serena and Michael weren’t arguing. Or if Terrance didn’t stroll over and steamroll the conversation. Or if Cody with the Cheekbones didn’t show up and completely distract me from the world.
“Are you sure you don’t want that tutor after all?” Serena asked as she chewed her bagel, raising her eyebrows suggestively.
“I’m sure.” I closed my eyes, letting my head fall back against the overstuffed chair in which I was seated.
“What’s wrong with you?” Michael said. “What’s wrong with her?” he asked Serena when I didn’t immediately reply.
“She’s just tired of being gorgeous and alone. It’s all finally weighing on her,” Serena said, diverting from the actual issue.
“Dude, I have so many friends who would hook up with you in a second,” Michael said. “All you have to do is say the word.… Actually, there was this guy asking about you the other day and—”
“Oh my God, Michael.” I lifted my head. “She was joking.”
He looked to Serena, who nodded in confirmation. “Edie just needs to study somewhere less distracting. Like, pretty much any place you aren’t.” She tossed a balled-up napkin at him.
Michael pressed his hand to his chest. “That hurts, Edie. That really hurts.”
I shook my head. “You know how much I tolerate you, Michael,” I said with a sweet smile. “I really tolerate you a lot.”
“She does. She talks about how much she tolerates you all the time.”
Michael rolled his eyes. “You two are the worst.”
I looked at Serena, and we both shrugged in agreement.
“Honesty is the best policy,” I said, beginning to gather my books.
“Well then, honestly, you better go, because Cody has his eyes on you and is on his way over here right now.” Serena rested her face in her hand, obscuring her face from Cody as she stuck her tongue out at me.
“Hey!” Cody with the Cheekbones said, a wave and a smile directed at only me.
“Hey,” I said, standing and shoving everything I owned into my bag. “I was actually just about to leave.”
“Oh, really?” His shoulders slumped forward.
“Yeah, sorry—”
Michael turned to Serena, his eyes flashing. “But weren’t you literally just saying that Edie wanted to find a man and was all sad and shit about being alone?”
Serena’s hand slapped Michael’s arm at the same time I let out a quick okay, time to leave.
“You’re an idiot,” Serena said, looking to me and then Cody. “Don’t listen to him. He has no manners.”
I looked at Cody. I could see it written all over his face. I liked him. I really did, but it wasn’t the right time. And even after a dozen conversations, he still didn’t understand that being in a relationship right now wasn’t what I wanted. That being in a long-distance relationship was absolutely not something I wanted.
“I’m sorry,” I said with a sigh. “I really do have to go.”