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The Angel and the Author - and Others, by Jerome K. Jerome
THE ANGEL AND THE AUTHOR —AND OTHERS
CHAPTER I
The Author tells of his Good Deeds.
The Angel appears to have made a slight Mistake.
The Author is troubled concerning his Investments.
And questions a Man of Thought.
CHAPTER II
Philosophy and the Dæmon.
When the Dæmon will not work.
CHAPTER III
Literature and the Middle Classes.
May a man of intelligence live, say, in Surbiton?
CHAPTER IV
Man and his Master.
Why the Man in Uniform has, generally, sad Eyes.
The Traveller’s one Friend.
The disadvantage of being an unknown Person.
CHAPTER V
If only we had not lost our Tails!
And little Boys would always tell the Truth!
And everyone obtained his just Deserts!
And only people would do Parlour Tricks who do them well!
And all the World had Sense!
CHAPTER VI
Fire and the Foreigner.
My British Stupidity.
I am considered Cold and Mad.
Sometimes I wish I were an American Woman.
CHAPTER VII
Too much Postcard.
The Postcard as a Family Curse.
The Artist’s Dream.
Why not the Eternal Male for a change?
How Women are ruined by Art.
Difficulty of living up to the Poster.
CHAPTER VIII
The Lady and the Problem.
The Stage Hero who, for once, had Justice done to him.
She has a way of mislaying her Husband.
What is a Lady to do with a Husband when she has finished with him?
Could she—herself—have been to blame?
CHAPTER IX
Civilization and the Unemployed.
Early instances of “Dumping.”
Cricket, as viewed from the fixed Stars.
The Heir of all Ages. His Inheritance.
Is it “Playing the Game?”
CHAPTER X
Patience and the Waiter.
Waiterkind in the making.
His Little Mistakes.
How to insult him.
CHAPTER XI
The everlasting Newness of Woman.
Doctor says she is not to be bothered.
That “Higher Life.”
Is there anything left for her to learn?
When they have tried it the other way round.
A brutal suggestion.
CHAPTER XII
Why I hate Heroes.
Because it always seems to be his Day.
Because he always “gets there,” without any trouble.
Because he’s so damned clever.
And, finally, because I don’t believe he’s true.
CHAPTER XIII
How to be Healthy and Unhappy.
The unsympathetic Umbrella.
A Martyr to Health.
He was never pig-headed.
Only just in time.
How to avoid Everything.
The one Cure-All.
CHAPTER XIV
Europe and the bright American Girl.
She has the Art of Listening.
The Republican Idea in practice.
What the Soldier dared not do.
Her path of Usefulness.
CHAPTER XV
Music and the Savage.
Recreation for the Higher clergy.
Why are we so young?
Where Brotherly (and Sisterly) Love reigns supreme.
The one sure Joke.
How Anarchists are made.
CHAPTER XVI
The Ghost and the Blind Children.
Why not, occasionally, a cheerful Ghost.
Where are the dead Humorists?
The Spirit does not shine as a Conversationalist.
She is now a Believer.
How does he do it?
Blind Children playing in a World of Darkness.
CHAPTER XVII
Parents and their Teachers.
Their first attempt.
The Parent can do no right.
His foolish talk.
The Child of Fiction.
The misunderstood Father.
CHAPTER XVIII
Marriage and the Joke of it.
Love and the Satyr.
What the Gipsy did not mention.
A few rules for Married Happiness.
The real Darby and Joan.
Many ways of Love.
Which is it?
CHAPTER XIX
Man and his Tailor.
The difficulty of being a Gentleman.
How we might, all of us, be Gentlemen.
Things a Gentleman should never do.
How one may know the perfect Gentleman.
Why not an Exhibition of Gentlemen?
CHAPTER XX
Woman and her behaviour.
Woman’s God.
Those unsexed Creatures.
References given—and required.
The ideal World.
A Lover’s View.
No time to think of Husbands.
The Wife of the Future.
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