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STEP 1 THE PRICE OF HAPPINESS GOALS FOR STEP 1 1. You will learn how to measure your moods as well as your satisfaction in your relationships with others using three self-assessment tests. You will take all three tests at least once per week to chart how much you have improved as you progress from step to step. 2. You will identify your personal goals for this experience. What do you hope to learn and accomplish as you read this book? If you had a magic wand and could solve all of your problems,
STEP 2 YOU FEEL THE WAY YOU THINK GOALS FOR STEP 2 In this step you will learn about several simple but revolutionary ideas that can change your life: 1. You FEEL the way you THINK. You will discover that negative feelings like depression, anxiety, and anger do not actually result from the bad things that happen to you but from the way you think about these events. 2. Most BAD feelings come from ILLOGICAL thoughts (“distorted thinking”). 3. You can CHANGE the way you FEEL! MOOD TESTING You alrea
STEP 3 YOU CAN CHANGE THE WAY YOU FEEL GOALS FOR STEP 3 1. In this step you will learn the difference between healthy and unhealthy feelings. Is anger good or bad? What’s the difference between healthy sadness and clinical depression? 2. You will learn how to break out of a bad mood. 3. You will learn what to do when you’re stuck in a bad mood. MOOD TESTING You have already taken three mood tests at the beginning of Steps 1 and 2. I would like you to take the three tests again at the beginning o
STEP 4 HOW TO BREAK OUT OF A BAD MOOD GOALS FOR STEP 4 In this step you will learn several techniques that can help you change the way you feel. These include: 1. The Attitude Cost-Benefit Analysis 2. The Experimental Method 3. Examine the Evidence 4. The Survey Method MOOD TESTING You have already taken three mood tests at the beginning of the previous steps. I would like you to take the three tests again at the beginning of this step to chart your progress. If you need help, you can review the
STEP 5 THE ACCEPTANCE PARADOX GOALS FOR STEP 5 1. You will learn about a powerful method for modifying Negative Thoughts called the Externalization of Voices. If you are in a Ten Days to Self-Esteem group, you can work in a group of two or three to practice. If you are working on your own, you can practice with a friend or do it on your own with the help of a mirror. 2. You will learn about two completely different ways of talking back to Negative Thoughts. One of them is called Self-defense and
STEP 6 GETTING DOWN TO ROOT CAUSES GOALS FOR STEP 6 1. In today’s step you will learn how self-defeating attitudes and beliefs can make you vulnerable to painful mood swings and to conflicts in personal relationships. 2. You will identify your own self-defeating attitudes with the Vertical Arrow Technique and with the Self-defeating Belief Scale. 3. You will learn how to develop a personal value system that will lead to greater happiness, productivity, and intimacy, now and in the future. MOOD T
STEP 7 SELF-ESTEEM—WHAT IS IT? HOW DO I GET IT? GOALS FOR STEP 7 In this step, we will focus on a buzzword that is frequently discussed but not often understood: self-esteem. You will discover the answers to these questions: 1. When people say they have low self-esteem, what do they really mean? 2. What are the consequences of low self-esteem? 3. Can a person have too much self-esteem? 4. What is the difference between self-esteem and self-confidence? 5. Should you base your self-esteem on your
STEP 8 THE PERFECTIONIST’S SCRIPT FOR SELF-DEFEAT GOALS FOR STEP 8 1. You will learn about several types of perfectionism, including physical perfectionism, achievement perfectionism, perceived perfectionism, emotional perfectionism, romantic perfectionism, relationship perfectionism, and obsessive-compulsive illness. 2. You will learn about the price you pay for being a perfectionist—along with the hidden benefits of this mind-set. 3. You will learn about the differences between neurotic perfec
STEP 9 A PRESCRIPTION FOR PROCRASTINATORS GOALS FOR STEP 9 1. You will learn about the ten characteristics of people who procrastinate. 2. You will discover the hidden benefits of procrastination. 3. You will learn how to attack procrastination with the Procrastination Cost-Benefit Analysis and with the Devil’s Advocate Technique. 4. You will discover how to become a more productive and creative person. MOOD TESTING You have already taken three mood tests at the beginning of the previous steps.
STEP 10 PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE! GOALS FOR STEP 10 1. In this step you will assess how much progress you have made so far. Have you achieved some of your goals? What work still remains to be done? I will emphasize the importance of continued practice so you can deal successfully with painful mood swings and enjoy greater self-esteem in the future. 2. You will learn how to deal with feelings of hopelessness and overcome the relapses into depression that may occur after you begin to feel bett
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