[Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Plunges into... 01] • Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Plunges into History Again by Society, Bathroom Readers' Hysterical -- Read -- Imperial Library of Trantor

Index

Cover Title Page Copyright Project Team THANK YOU! THANK YOU HYSTERICAL SCHOLARS! CONTENTS Introduction DISASTER!

London’s Burning

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

Where Are They Now? The Neanderthals

BUILDING BLOCKS OF HISTORY

These Toolish Things

This Old House AUTHOR, AUTHOR!

Black Like Him

AFFLICTION

Fears and Phobias of the Famous

Just Crazy About Trains IT’S WAR TO YOUR HEALTH *

The Golden Age of Quackery

HOLLYWOOD REWRITES HISTORY

Hollywood Rewrites History

LOVE AND MARRIAGE *

Forbidden Love

MISCELLANEOUS *

Talkin’ Trash

The Mighty Pen Mission Impossible AMUSEMENTS

Parading Through the Americas

MEMORABLE MEN

Billy, Don’t Be a Hero

A Brunch of Rebels MOVING EXPERIENCES *

Ancient Ninja: Separating the Men From the Myth

HISTORY’S HELPMATES

Rocking Horses

It’s a Dog Tag’s Life Bad Trip HISTORY IN THE RE-MAKING

Sir Francis Fake

The American Plague The “Relax, This Won’t Hurt a Bit” Awards A Grave Mistake ARTISTS ON THE CUTTING EDGE

No Nuts, No Glory!

FOOD GLORIOUS FOOD

A Match Made in Heaven

AMERICANA

The Experiment That Failed

WAY WITH WORDS

The Cat’s Pajamas

Guerrilla Warfare Part 2, The Civil War WILY WOMEN

The First Gold Digger

Gold Rush Gals One Potato, Two Potato FASHIONISTAS

Chanel No. 1

The Night You Couldn’t Get a Taxi in Paris Hollywood Rewrites History: Titanic AROUND THE WORLD

Let’s Go to Greenland!

WHEN YOU GOTTA GO

Bathroom Safety

INVENTIVE MINDS

The Coolest Man in History

You Shred It, Wheat! Dancing for Dollars The Really Depressing Great Depression IT’S JUST BUSINESS

Ye Olde Moneylender *

Knocking Em’ Dead in Poughkeepsie Theater of the Absurd Where Are They Now? The Etruscans The First Great Ecological Disaster FAMOUS FIRSTS

Forgotten Firsts

Blue Belle Rejects of the Constitution Can I Get That in Writing? Uncle John’s Wedding and Bedding Awards Where Are They Now? The Sumerians The Yanks Are Coming! Carbine Williams Now You’re Cooking With Gas! Guerrilla Warfare Part 3, The U.S. Army Rangers Island Hopping From Barbocoa to Briquette The Sun King Diet The King’s Champagne Ring-a-Ding-Ding Take My Wife…Please! Love and Silverware ART ATTACK

The Painted Lady

Starving for Their Art? Let There Be Libraries More Mighty Pen The Fall of the Wall Seeing Red Where Are They Now? The Phoenicians MYSTERY HISTORY

Before Roswell

The Magic Man A Prophet Who Slept His Way to the Top

Chips Off the Old Block? Part 1

Attack of the Killer Balloons Made in Japan A Breed Apart TAKE THIS JOB…

Peru’s Pooper Scoopers

A Fly on the Wall Hey, Who Turned the Lights Off? Time of the Seasoning Before They Were Poets The Oops Factor Little Things Mean a Lot Smithsonian by the Numbers Lew Who? Return of the “Relax, This Won’t Hurt a Bit” Awards Wordsville Guerrilla Warfare Part 4, The Green Berets Nuclear Nightmares Who “Nose” the Real Cyrano de Bergerac? Thar She Blows Killer Flu A Plain History of the Amish Where Are They Now? The Goths Hollywood Rewrites History: Gladiator Chips Off the Old Block? Part 2 Guerrilla Warfare Part 5, Delta Force QUIZZICAL STUFF

All That Jazz

A Hair-raising Story Hats Off to Mustafa Kemal! Corn: The A-maizing Story God of the Dance Ear Piercing That Stinking Feeling: Part I Flower Power A Nobel Experiment Tea Time Tempest Over a Tea Party Guerrilla Warfare Part 6, Navy SEALs Seuss on the Loose Shaolin Smack Down That Stinking Feeling: Part II A Hun-nymoon in Venice Where Are They Now? The Huns The Gates of Paradise Let Them Eat Le Big Mac Where Are They Now? The Maya The Saint That Ain’t Horsepower THE KNIGHT STUFF

The Knights Templar: Part I

Parallel History When Henry Met David Hey, Your Fly Is Closed! Where Are They Now? The Celts Worst Impressions What a Paine in the Neck! A Prettier Paul Revere Mona Lisa Caper The Plundering Politician Rage Against the Machine Published in Prison Pinball’s Rise and Fall A Tough Job Making Their Mark Nobody Helped Pokers, Drawn The Riot of Spring Another Blooming Quiz! Office Etymology Tennis, Anyone? The Knights Templar: Part II The Third Leg The Longest Mile More Horsepower Overnight Success The Preposterous Plate of Brass Hollywood Rewrites History: Robin Hood Prince of Thieves When Congressmen Attack “My Name Is Bill…” A Seedy History The Story of Butter Typhoid Mary, Quite Contrary Puuuuush! Yoga Stretches Westward A Bump On the Head Someone’s Derivative A Cymbal of Success Move Over Babe Ruth Queen Isabella The Real M*A*S*H Those Handy Bags Star Shine The Price of Free Speech The Witch of Wall Street You Go Girls! Great Gigs of History The Enigma of Enigma Dreamland by the Sea * Leonardo the Science Guy The Queen’s Dwarf The Sport of Kings QUIZ ANSWERS INDEX

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