PornBurger · Hot Buns and Juicy Beefcakes by Ramsey, Mathew -- Read -- Imperial Library of Trantor

Index

Dedication Epigraph Contents Acknowledgments Introduction Pornburger 101 Burger Stacks

Of Hooves & Heifers

The Bambi Bao-Ser’s Castle Burger Bill U Murray Me? Birthday Sex Calicornication The Chronic-Kah Burger Creamed Porn Croque Van Damme The Full Mounty Harissa Tomei Horn Dog Cheeseburger Pop Tart The Inglorious Basquered The James Francophile The Lolita Melon Monroe The Merman My Bloody Valentine The Pickleback Pumpk’n Spice Fatte Porknado The Slumberjack So Kalbi Maybe The Hawaiian Five “O” Face The Spread-Eagle Burger The Umilfy Wake’n Bacon The Wooly Lamb-Oth The Willem Dafoe-Nut The Yorkshire Pudd-Tang

Of Fish & Fowl

Foie-Ck A Duck A Fish Called Hitachi Wanda I Woke Up Like This The Mac Daddy Burger

Of Earth & Turf

Fugazim

Centerfolds

Meat Your Maker Getting Beefy

Maple-Bacon-Wrapped Burgers Onion-Soup-Braised Beef Tongue Patties The Juicy Floozy Patties Steak Tartare Patties Oxtail Burgers with Sweet Vermouth Oxtail Jus

Let’s Pork

Primo Pork Burgers Half-Smoke Burgers Stuffed with Beef Cheek Chili

Belly of the Beast

Slow-Roasted Pork Belly Candied Prosciutto Cooking with Bae Carnitas Beer-Braised Pork Cheeks

On the Lamb

Lamb Burgers Slow-Roasted Lamb Belly

Deer Prudence

Venison Burgers

Fowl Play

Seared Foie Gras Duck Burgers Au Poivre Fried Chicken

Wet ’N’ Wild

Lobster Burgers Smoked Trout Burgers

Farm to Veg-Table

Compressed Watermelon Patties Veggie Burgers Double-Fried Pickle “Patties”

The Pornburger Pantry

Condiments

Mayonnaise-Based Condiments Mustard-Based Condiments Ketchup-Based Condiments

Sauces & Spreads

Avocado Crema Grilled Pineapple Butter Roasted Physalis Shallot Compote Strawberry Harissa Cornichon Relish Bacon Jam Port Wine Onion Jam Bone Marrow Onion Jam Bacon Peanut Butter Foie Gras Mousse Foie Gras Cognac Sauce Truffle Whipped Goat Cheese Sous-Vide Chicken Liver Pâté Demi-Glace Boozy Cheese Sauce Parmesan Mornay Creamy Hunter Sauce (Sauce Chasseur) Pineapple Gastrique Roasted Tomatillo Salsa Caffeinated Maple Syrup Chorizo Hollandaise Sausage Gravy Uni Beurre Blanc

Vegetable Accoutrements

Ancho-Chile-Rubbed Grilled Corn Roasted Brussels Sprouts Crispy Asparagus Shavings Caramelized Onions Black-Vinegar-Marinated Onions Shallot/Onion/Garlic Confit Creamed Corn Cold-Smoked Tomatoes Old Bay and Bacon Potato Salad Potato Parsnip Gratin Smoked Shiitake “Bacon”

Quick Pickles

Quick Pickled Beets Quick Pickled Hamburger Dills Rice Vinegar Cucumber Pickles Jalapeño Pickles Red Onion Pickles Red Cabbage Slaw Pickled Fennel Pickled Hot Dogs

Buns & Batter

Brioche Buns Cheeseburger Pop Tarts White Castle Cheeseburger Waffles Cheddar Buttermilk Biscuits Liège Waffles Potato-Chip-Crusted Foie Gras Gougères Rice Buns Deesnuts (Crescent Roll Donuts) Goat Cheese Beignets Fried Macaroni and Cheese Buns Shrimp Toasts Kalamata Olive/Onion Confit and Cherry Cakes Pineapple Upside-Down Cakes Yorkshire Pudding Root Vegetable Latkes Whole Kernel Corn/Jalapeño Batter

Sidekicks

Guacamole Bonbons Crispy Gnocchi Tots Beef Leaf Fries with Gremolata Black Garlic Fries with Bone Marrow Poutine Chicken-Fried Popcorn Sweetbreads Chicken-Fried Pig Ears Shut-The-Fuck-Up Puppies (Oyster and Crab Hush Puppies) Kimchi Tempura Shoestring Onion Rings

Whistle Whetters

The Liquid Diet Malted Underberg Milkshake Round Midnight Coconut Horchata Frosteezes Burnt Creamsicle

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