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Index
CHAPTER ONE:EVERYONE DIED VIOLENTLY
CHAPTER TWO:THOR’S KIND OF A DICK WHEN HE’S HUNGRY
CHAPTER THREE:ALL THE PRESIDENT’S ASS-KICKING
CHAPTER FOUR:QUETZALCOATL HATES CLOCKS
CHAPTER FIVE:BAKED SPIT AND BROKEN GLASS
CHAPTER SIX:BANANABILISM
CHAPTER SEVEN:HAPPY FUN BREAKFAST TIME
CHAPTER EIGHT:TALK ECONOMICAL TO ME, BABY
CHAPTER NINE:CLASSY
CHAPTER TEN:BRING THE SHOTGUN
CHAPTER ELEVEN:QUETZALCOATL ALSO HATES CHILDREN
CHAPTER TWELVE:THE OTHER HALF IS VIOLENCE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN:HE’S PRETTY WELL-SPOKEN FOR THE GUY WHO FOUNDED KENTUCKY
CHAPTER FOURTEEN:BUSINESS ETHICS
CHAPTER FIFTEEN:THERE ARE A LOT OF DEAD ACROBATS FOR SOME REASON
CHAPTER SIXTEEN:THE HOBO STATE
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN:FOR SCIENCE
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN:THE GHOST IN THE NON-MACHINES
CHAPTER NINETEEN:EXPLETIVES AHOY
INTERLUDE:THOR, GOD OF CHRONOLOGICAL NARRATIVES
CHAPTER TWENTY:MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE COMPOUND…
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE:BAG LADY
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO:BAD PUN! BAD PUN!
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE:TORSOS-A-GO-GO
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR:ADAPT OR DIE
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE:AT LEAST IT’S NOT RAINING MAN-EATING FROGS, RIGHT?
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX:HOPE TASTES DELICIOUS
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN:SERIOUSLY, CLOWNS SUCK
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT:THE SMITING ISSUE
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE:HE’S GOT THE TOLERANCE OF A BELLIGERENT IRISHMAN
CHAPTER THIRTY:SHAKESPEARE INVENTED THE HOOKER METAPHOR
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE:IT’S NOT LAZY IF YOU CALL IT AN HOMAGE
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO:KA-THUNK
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE:THE SAME THING WE DO EVERY NIGHT
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR:HIS NAME WAS SLEEPZOR, HE WAS A TIREDMOTRON
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE:DISPERSING THE DIPLOMATS
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX:COWBOYS AND INDIANS
CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN:HE’S REFERRING, OF COURSE, TO THE GREAT SEWAGE FLOODS OF IOWA
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT:ECONOMIC STIMULUS SHOVEL
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE:NICE TO MEET YOU
CHAPTER FORTY:FAMOUS LAST WORDS
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE:THE PEN IS MIGHTIER THAN THE LASER RIFLE
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO:HOLLOW MIDGET ARSONISTS
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE:KILL SEQUENCE 588 INVOLVES NOTHING BUT A SPOON
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR:STOP ME IF YOU’VE HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE…
CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE:IT’S ON NOW, BITCHES
CHAPTER FORTY-SIX:OR A MONKEY IN PEOPLE CLOTHES
CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN:IT WAS, IN FACT, HIS THIRD
CHAPTER FORTY-EIGHT:THIS ONE GOES OUT TO ALL THE ENGLISH MAJORS
CHAPTER FORTY-NINE:HIPPIE HIPPIE SHAKE
CHAPTER FIFTY:THE BEST LAID PLANS
CHAPTER FIFTY-ONE:THIS IS A CALL
CHAPTER FIFTY-TWO:HOSED IF YOU DO, HOSED IF YOU DON’T
CHAPTER FIFTY-THREE:SIN CITY
CHAPTER FIFTY-FOUR:ELEGY
CHAPTER FIFTY-FIVE:IF THE HELICOPTER’S A-ROCKIN’...
CHAPTER FIFTY-SIX:BOOM
CHAPTER FIFTY-SEVEN:JOIN, OR DIE
CHAPTER FIFTY-EIGHT:IT’D TAKE A MIRACLE
CHAPTER FIFTY-NINE:OLIVE BRANCH
CHAPTER SIXTY:A TINY, STEAMING LOAD
CHAPTER SIXTY-ONE:BOSS FIGHT
CHAPTER SIXTY-TWO:HELL HATH NO FURY
CHAPTER SIXTY-THREE:RAGNAROK & ROLL
CHAPTER SIXTY-FOUR:THE END
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