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Index
Cover Title Page Copyright Page Dedication Contents Music Is My Boyfriend
Oaf’s Story: Chapter One
Worst Dates Ever: 1983
Oaf’s Story: Chapter Two
Worst Dates Ever: 1986
Oaf’s Story: Chapter Three
Worst Dates Ever: 1992 Interlude
Oaf’s Story: Chapter Four
Worst Dates Ever: 1999
Eiffel’s Story: Chapter Five
Worst Non-Date Ever: 2004 Kitty Interlude How Attila Joined the Band
Oaf + Eiffel: Chaper Six
How Olaph Joined the Band
Oaf + Eiffel: Chaper Seven
How Izeed Joined the Band
Oaf + Eiffel: Chaper Eight
How Udaho Joined the Band Kitty Interlude Eiffel’s Really Bad Break-Ups: “Chelsea”
Oaf + Eiffel: Chaper Nine
Eiffel’s Really Bad Break-Ups: “Ramon”
Oaf + Eiffel: Chaper Ten
Eiffel’s Really Bad Break-Ups: “Eezie”
Oaf + Eiffel: Chaper Eleven
Eiffel’s Really Bad Break-Ups: “Hammond”
Oaf’s Story: Chapter Twelve
The Short Stories
Birth of an Oaf Wuvable Oaf in “Muchomachomusclebros.com” Lil’ Papa & Oaf in Miracle Birth Smusherrrr in Straight Street Pavel in Special Needs Kitty Santino Strays Happy Birthday, Bufu!!! Pwetty in Pink! Reigning Gole Blud “Beardos” Pig in the City Ejaculoid in “Ultimate Sacrifice” Sphihcterine in “Muddy Buddy” Ejaculoid in “Rawk Gawdz” Wuvable Oaf and the Troff Pig Wuvable Ogre in Forbidden! Wuvable Oaf in “San Furrancisco”
The Official Handbook to the Oafiverse Glossary of Terms A Very Special Thanks To:
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