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Index
Cover
Contents
About the Book
About the Author
Title Page
Introduction
Part 1: Understanding Sex and Desire
Chapter 1: Why Intimacy Is Important
Sex and Intimacy
Sexual touch
What is intimacy?
Better health
So why are many people still not as comfortable as they would like to be with their sexual expression and intimacy?
EXERCISE: HOLDING HANDS
Sexual Behaviours
Chapter 2: Gender Differences
Sex as a Relationship Barometer
Sexual Frequency
Change Your Sexual Thinking
Sexual Triggers
Responsive versus active desire
QUIZ: IS YOUR SEXUAL DESIRE RESPONSIVE OR ACTIVE?
Chapter 3: Your Sexual Image
Exercise: Becoming Sexually Aware
Sex Is Natural – Isn’t It?
First Sexual Experiences
Exercise: Your Sexual Beginnings
Understanding Your Sexual Self
Exercise: Building Ourselves
Enjoying Arousal
Exercise: Developing Mindful Awareness
Part 2: Sexual Coupledom
Chapter 4: Keeping Your Relationship Alive
Case Example: Trudy and Greg
‘In a Relationship’
Adapting
Expecting Too Much
Living Together
Managing Differences
Case Example: Karen and Calum
Case Example: Jim and Andy
Quiz: How Do You Manage Difference?
How Problems Develop
The Honeymoon Period
The ‘Cuddle Hormone’
When Early Euphoria Wears Off
Making Time
Spontaneity
Boredom
Chapter 5: The Sexual Dowry
Comfort With Affection
Case Example: Will and Ewan
Shame About Feelings
Exercise: Sex Education
Gender Issues
Exercise: How Expectations Affect Sexual Expression
Talking Point: The Sexual Sentry
Pleasing Yourself
Honesty and Vulnerability
Nurturing Self-Image
Chapter 6: Sexual Performance
Arousing Women
Vaginal Orgasm
Misguided Expectations
Touching Exercises
Body Exploration
After the Exercise
Sensual Discovery
Attempting Arousal
Arousal to Orgasm
Mindfulness
Exercise: Indoor Mindfulness
Unwanted Thoughts
Part 3: Overcoming Sexual Challenges
Chapter 7: Body Knowledge
Breasts
The Vagina
The Vulva
The Clitoris
Labia
The Cervix
Vaginal Odour
Vaginal Discharge
Penis Size
Male Genitalia
Chapter 8: Sexual Secrets
Masturbation
Case Example: Pip and Nor
Fetishes
Body Fetishes
Transvestism
Partners of Transvestites
Internet Pornography
Case Example: Alan and Ruth
Cybersex and Brain Changes
Partners
Women and Porn
Sexual Compulsion
Affairs and Infidelity
Talking Point: Identifying Infidelity
Sexting
Betrayal
Chapter 9: Ageing
Ageing in Men
Erectile Dysfunction
Longer to Climax
Enlarged Prostate
Low Testosterone
Ageing in Women
The Menopause
Chapter 10: Physical Limitations
Pelvic Inflammatory Disease (Pid)
Endometriosis
Ovarian Cysts
Mittelschmerz
Fertility
Pregnancy
Sex After Pregnancy
Musculoskeletal Disorders
Back Pain
Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
Breast Conditions
Cancer
Cardiovascular Disease
Diabetes
Prostate Conditions
Chronic Pelvic Pain Syndrome
Prostate Cancer
Overactive Bladder and Incontinence
Pelvic-Floor Exercises
Bowel Problems
Irritable Bowel Syndrome
Brain Injury and Strokes
Obesity
Herpes
Balanitis
Queefing
Pelvic Organ Prolapse
Hysterectomy
Chapter 11: Sexual Dysfunctions
Pain and Discomfort
Dyspareunia
Vaginismus
Provoked Vestibulodynia (PVD) and Generalised Vulvodynia
Effect on Relationships
Creative Solutions
Case Example: Kate and Frank
Genital Pain in Men
Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder
Erectile Difficulties
Treatment of ED
Exercise: Wax and Wane
Arousal and Orgasm
Early Ejaculation
Stop:start and Vaginal Intercourse
Stop:start and Anal Sex
Difficulty Climaxing in Men
Faking Orgasm
Difficulty Climaxing in Women
Chapter 12: Psychosexual Therapy
Case Example: Rita and Lim
Case Example: Stella and Patrick
What to Expect
Initial Assessment
History Taking
Making Goals
Treatment
Maintenance
Part 4: Maintaining and Improving Your Sex Life
Chapter 13: Sexual Realism
Fire-Fighting Problems
Looking for Alternatives
Case Example: Liv and Ulrika
Walking Around Obstacles
Finding Time for Sex
Exercise: Making Changes
Talking Point: Sexual Frequency
Asexual Relationships
Separate Beds
Hygiene
Chapter 14: Communicating
Quiz: How You Communicate
Sexual Confidence
Soulmates
Talking Point: Discussing Sex
Exercise: Discussing Sex
The ‘I Want–i Will’ Book
Exercise: Checking In
Reminiscing
Saying No to Sex
Asperger Syndrome
Asperger Syndrome and Sexual Problems
Partners
Communicating With and Without Words
Exercise: The Sounds of Silence
Exercise: How to Have a Conversation
Chapter 15: Safe Sexual Experimentation
Safe Sex
Sexual Exploration
Location, Location, Location
Oral Sex
Sex Toys
Role Play
Bdsm
Sexual Fantasy
Female Hot Spots
Multiple Orgasms
Fisting
Rimming
Anal Penetration
Frottage
Quickies
Tantra
Conclusion: Celebrating Sexuality
Kissing
Date Nights
Case Example: Sonia and Craig
Making Sex Special
After Sex
Resources
Getting Help
Relate
Psychosexual Therapy
Useful Reading
Index
Copyright
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