How to Be Miserable by Paterson, Randy J. -- Read -- Imperial Library of Trantor

Index

Cover Contents Introduction: The Dreams of Another Age

The Ten-Million-Dollar Question Column A and Column B What’s the Problem? Let’s All Embrace the Dark Side Four Points, Forty Lessons A Note to the Uncommitted

Part One: Adopting a Miserable Lifestyle

Lesson 1: Avoid All Exercise Lesson 2: Eat What You’re Told Lesson 3: Don’t Waste Your Life in Bed Lesson 4: Live Better Through Chemistry Lesson 5: Maximize Your Screen Time Lesson 6: If You Want It, Buy It Lesson 7: Can’t Afford It? Get It Anyway! Lesson 8: Give 100 Percent to Your Work Lesson 9: Be Well Informed Lesson 10: Set VAPID Goals

Part Two: How to Think Like an Unhappy Person

Lesson 11: Rehearse the Regrettable Past Lesson 12: Blame Inward, Give Credit Outward Lesson 13: Practice the “Three Bad Things” Exercise Lesson 14: Construct Future Hells Lesson 15: Value Hope Over Action Lesson 16: Become a Toxic Optimist Lesson 17: Filter for the Negative Lesson 18: Cultivate Your Presence—Elsewhere Lesson 19: Insist on Perfection Lesson 20: Work Endlessly on Your Self-Esteem

Part Three: Hell Is Other People

Lesson 21: Become an Island unto Yourself Lesson 22: Give Them What They Want Lesson 23: Measure Up and Measure Down Lesson 24: Play to Win Lesson 25: Hold High Expectations of Others Lesson 26: Drop Your Boundaries Lesson 27: Bond with People’s Potential, Not Their Reality Lesson 28: Demand Loyalty Lesson 29: React to Their Motives, Not Their Messages Lesson 30: Cultivate and Treasure Toxic Relationships

Part Four: Living a Life Without Meaning

Lesson 31: Keep Your Eye on the Small Picture Lesson 32: Let Your Impulses Be Your Guide Lesson 33: Look Out for Number One Lesson 34: Duty First, Life Later Lesson 35: Live the Unlived Lives of Others Lesson 36: Stay in Your Zone of Comfort Lesson 37: Avoid Solitude Lesson 38: Choose Fashion over Style Lesson 39: Pursue Happiness Relentlessly Lesson 40: Improve Yourself Conclusion: Ending the Misery Project: Life on the Top Floor

The Causes of Misery And Now, Ladies and Gentlemen, Please Remove Your Masks Short Term, Long Term Pain-based Impulses An Unreliable Crystal Ball A Culture with an Agenda Some Advice, At Last

Acknowledgments Notes References and Additional Reading