The Sexy Vegan Cookbook by Patton, Brian L. -- Read -- Imperial Library of Trantor

Index

Cover Title Copyright Contents Acknowledgments Introduction Chapter 1. The Most Important Meal of the Day… Cocktails!

The Bloodbath The Arnold Bomber The Dirty Dudetini The Knucklehead The Numbskull The Get Busy

Chapter 2. Beatin’ the Meat Meat Substitutes

Basic Seitan My Balls Pretend Italian Sausages Pretend Breakfast Sausage Patties Tempeh Bacon Pretend Canadian Bacon Tempeh Chorizo

Chapter 3. The Second Most Important Meal of the Day, After Cocktails Breakfast

Mostest Ultimate-est Breakfast Sandwich in the History of the Universe Hangover Hash Sexy’s Scramble Morning Benediction Avocado Toast The Big One The Real Man’s Quiche Sailor’s Oatmeal with Glazed Walnuts The Almond Brothers Breakfast Bar Smoothness

Chapter 4. Spoon-Fed Soups

New England Blam Chowder Cauliflower and Roasted Fennel Soup Country Veggie Soup Minestrone Onion Soup White Bean and Kale Soup Peanut Butternut Squash Soup Harvest Vegetable Soup Sambar

Chapter 5. Go Fork Yourself! Salads

Et Tu, Tempeh? The Karate Chop The Grilled Cobb The Beet Down Curry Fried Tofu Salad The Girlfriend’s Favorite Salad That She Constantly Asks Me to Make and Won’t Shut the Hell Up About Southwest Slaw Marinated Eggplant Pasta Salad Chickpea Party Seared Hearts of Palm Salad

Chapter 6. Handheld Sandwiches

The Seitan Worshipper The S.I.L.F. The Quote-Unquote Tuna Melt The Portly Fellow The Fat Ass Bourbon Tempeh Sliders The Beany Tahini Burger Black Bean Burger with Kajillion Island Dressing

Chapter 7. The Dinner Bell Entrees

Spaghetti and Balls Lasagna Fauxlognese Stuffed Shells Puttanesca Oyster Mushroom Risotto Grilled Seitan Caponata with Lemon Pilaf Colonel Schmolonel’s Fried Seitan with Mashed Taters, Gravy, and Greens Barbecue Ribz with Smoky Elbows and Cheeze Crabby Cakes over Succotash Grilled “Fish” Tacos with Corn and Jicama Salad Seitan Steak ‘n’ Fries Mexicali Quinoa with Black Lentils and Pretend Chipotle Sausages Jambalaya Shepherd’s Pie

Chapter 8. Pizza!!

Basic Pizza Dough The Mario The Luigi Pretend Sausage and Peppers The B.L.A.T. Three-Cheeze Pesto The Mush-a-boki

Chapter 9. Snackage

Nachos Venti Tater Skinz Creamy Onion Dip Golden Beet Hummus Buffalo Wangs Boomin’ Shroomers Gargantuan Guac Jalapeno Poppers Juanito’s Salsa Pico de Gallo La Carga de la Madre Homemade Refried Beans

Chapter 10. Condiments and Sauces

The Crazy Shit and the Crazy Shit Vinegar Barbecrazyshit Sauce Kajillion Island Dressing Dreamy Tahini Dressing Balsamic Glaze The Tomato Killer Fauxlognese Sauce Peanut Sauce Sour Creaminess Chili Topping Seitan Seasoning Scramble Seasoning Blackened Seasoning Parmesan Topping Hollandaze Sauce Cashew Ricotta Not-zzarella Sauce Smoked Cheddar Sauce Not Yo Mama’s Cheeze Sauce Basil Pesto

Bonus Chapter. we all Scream!! Ice Cream

Nilla Raspberry Hibiscus The Green Goblin The Sailor’s Peanut Butter Rum

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