Tidy the F*ck Up by Condo, Messie -- Read -- Imperial Library of Trantor

Index

Front Cover Title Page Copyright Page Contents Introduction 1 Why Can’t You Get Your Sh*t Together?

2 Throw Sh*t Out

Designate a purge and allow yourself to break some rules Remember what your happy place looks like Surround yourself with stuff you like and use Does your enjoyment of the thing transcend logic? The practical approach to joy Resist the urge to multitask Save the sentimental shit for later Stay in your lane You can’t control other people Your family doesn’t want your shit Turn off the fucking television Be like Elsa and let it go Aunt Mary won’t notice if you donate her dishes Storage units are a racket Your Chapter 2 Checklist

3 How to Organize Your Sh*t

Getting down to brass tacks Books It’s not a fucking trophy case Get real—you’re never reading that Proudly display your “desert island” picks Magazines get a special shout-out Papers Your smartphone is your BFF Get your inspiration from better sources Reclaim the refrigerator It’s the 21st century: time for paperless statements Have stereo instructions ever been useful? If you didn’t learn it the first time . . . Don’t leave the money stuff lying around Random crap If it doesn’t have a home, its home is in the trash Your kitchen is full of random crap How many fucking pens do you need? Your bathroom should not look like an Ulta Beauty No, you don’t need an Ethernet cable Ditch the DVDs (and Blu-Rays) The American version of a savings account (the piggybank) Honorable mention: empty boxes Clothing You have too many fucking sweaters You’re entitled to your sweatpants A messy heap takes up more space than tidy items If you can’t see it, you won’t wear it It’s a closet, not an Oreo—don’t overstuff it Life is too fucking short to fold your underwear Where to put your parka in June Memory Lane Carve out a day for this one Resistance is futile Don’t confuse the memory with the thing Keep the crème de la crème Photographic memory not required Collectibles: display them or dump them When is enough enough? Your Chapter 3 Checklist

4 Put Sh*t Away

Decide where you want things You don’t have a lack of storage, you have too much shit Work smarter, not harder Keep your shit to yourself Lean into the lazy Pulling out that bottom bin is a bitch Channel your inner MacGyver . . . or not Russian nesting dolls have their shit together Changing handbags doesn’t have to be its own project American closets are not one-size-fits-all If you can see it, it should make you happy Embrace the embarrassing shit Live like your mother-in-law’s stopping by Clutter in organization’s clothing Be grateful, not guilt-ridden Your Chapter 4 Checklist

5 The Magical Feeling of Having Your Sh*t Together

Become a decision-making badass Make room in your life for more good stuff A clean space helps you hit the reset button Tidying is like therapy you don’t have to pay for Sometimes you’re going to regret tossing the toaster Dress like you’re ready to get your hands dirty How do you want your home to feel? Your home has to evolve with you Whenever possible, give old things new life Clutter messes with your shit Don’t let your shopping history repeat itself Life after clutter Your Chapter 5 Checklist