You're Not Crazy - It's Your Mother · Understanding and Healing for Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers by Morrigan, Danu -- Read -- Imperial Library of Trantor

Index

Introduction

IGNORING MOTHERS AND ENGULFING MOTHERS WHAT CAUSES NPD? CAN SHE HELP IT?

Chapter 2 How Narcissism Manifests Itself in Your Mother

She is either glowing or huffing. She re-writes history. She invalidates you. She rages at you. Nothing ever gets resolved. She ruins your special days and dismisses your successes. But she loves your tragedies. She creates Scapegoats and Golden Children.

Being the Scapegoat: Being the Golden Child:

She parentifies. She infantilises. She never apologises. Nothing is ever her fault. She has a victim/martyr mentality. She’s vindictive, and operates smear campaigns. She never allows you to be your authentic self. She triangulates. She probably loves her illnesses. She is odd about gifts and presents. She might hate your partner. She has no boundaries. It’s always about her needs. She lies to you about who you are. She is very sensitive. She talks a lot. A lot! She’s a master of projection. She probably mismanaged your appearance. She may neglect your medical care. She might make you overly dependent too young. She probably has zero curiosity. She’s sly. She probably will be vain. She rarely cries genuine tears. She doesn’t genuinely mourn. She has no sense of humour. She probably loves prestige. She may blame you for getting in the way of some huge success. She has no introspection. She takes everything personally. She lies against all the evidence. She’s inappropriate with service staff.

ENABLING FATHERS Chapter 3 The Effects on Us of Being Raised as the Daughter of a Narcissistic Mother

We often have problems with perception, and think we’re crazy. It feels like we were born broken. We expect our own perfection. We might be like a bird behind a window. We feel we’re powerless against her. We usually have self-esteem issues. We have difficulty knowing who we are. We can lack confidence. We can have difficulty being assertive. We can tend to end up in bad relationships. We can have difficulty trusting others. We can have difficulty showing emotion. We can tend to have addictions. We are prone to self-harm and self-neglect. We can have a disconnect between our thoughts and our feelings. We can struggle to claim things for ourselves. We can end up either over-achieving, or under-achieving. Loneliness can be a big issue. We might suffer from social anxiety. We can have difficulty accepting compliments. We are prone to depression. We can have a history of suicide thoughts and/or attempts.

Chapter 4 The Emotional Roller-Coaster

It can all take a while to process.

Chapter 5 Your Future Relationship with Her

So what do you do?

Low Contact Keeping to boundaries

Going No Contact So, now that you know what No Contact means, how do you do it? (Untitled) Effects of No Contact What do you say to people about the fact you’re No Contact? What do you tell your children about No Contact? What about siblings? ‘But what if she dies? Won’t you feel guilty about NC then?’

Are You Narcissistic?

Fleas

Chapter 7 Your Programmed Beliefs

The joy of being wrong

ABOUT HEALING Chapter 8 (Untitled) Claim Your Truth (Untitled) Chapter 9 What About Forgiving Her? Chapter 10 Therapy Chapter 11 EFT – Emotional Freedom Technique

PERSONAL PEACE PROCEDURE EFT FOR LIMITING BELIEFS Tapping affirmation EFT for addictions

Chapter 12 EFT Scripts

TAP AWAY YOUR SELF-CARE DEFICIT TAP AWAY THE USELESS HOPE SHE’LL CHANGE TAP AWAY YOUR GRIEF AND BEREAVEMENT TAP AWAY THE HURT SHE DROPPED YOU SO EASILY TAP AWAY THE FEAR OF HER TAP AWAY YOUR GUILT AT GOING LC OR NC TAP AWAY THE FEAR OF BEING WRONG TAP AWAY THE BLOCKS TO HEALING Now You Are Free To Fly

FURTHER RESOURCES

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APPENDIX I

Borderline Personality Disorder

(Untitled) Histrionic Personality Disorder Anti-Social Personality Disorder

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