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Index
Cover
Title Page
Dedication
Table of Contents
Prologue: Too Young
Chapter 1 - Why Won’t They Let Me Do This?
Chapter 2 - Dear Mr Alcoholic
Chapter 3 - A Child is Born …
Chapter 4 - Why Would People Even Think It?
Chapter 5 - Payment Point
Chapter 6 - Single
Chapter 7 - Bored, Bored, Bored, Bored …
Chapter 8 - Some People Just Can’t Wait
Chapter 9 - Maybe it’s Because I’m a Londoner
Chapter 10 - Nice New Motors
Chapter 11 - My (So-Called) Exciting Life
Chapter 12 - Bloody Cat …
Chapter 13 - Why This Is a Good Job
Chapter 14 - Death and What Follows
Chapter 15 - I Do Like Some Drivers …
Chapter 16 - The Dangers of Prostitution
Chapter 17 - My Night Shift
Chapter 18 - I Hate Psychiatric ‘Services’
Chapter 19 - Sticky Feet
Chapter 20 - Workload
Chapter 21 - Night Shifts
Chapter 22 - Busy, Busy, Busy
Chapter 23 - New Uniforms (But Still Green)
Chapter 24 - Daddy, Daughter; Kill
Chapter 25 - ORCON!
Chapter 26 - Oh … Bollocks …
Chapter 27 - ‘Donor’ Takes on New Meaning
Chapter 28 - Pavlov’s Dog
Chapter 29 - Mothering Sunday
Chapter 30 - The Other Guy
Chapter 31 - Twelve Hours to Go
Chapter 32 - Proper Day
Chapter 33 - These Boots …
Chapter 34 - Gamma GT
Chapter 35 - Deaf Old Women
Chapter 36 - Hand Over Mouth
Chapter 37 - Essential, Not Emergency
Chapter 38 - Return of Pavlov’s EMT
Chapter 39 - Naughty?
Chapter 40 - Too Darn Busy
Chapter 41 - How Not to Stop a Stolen Car
Chapter 42 - Sunday
Chapter 43 - Eight … Nine Down
Chapter 44 - Health Copyright
Chapter 45 - Venus Transit
Chapter 46 - Not All Bad
Chapter 47 - Wedding Saga + Pub Fight
Chapter 48 - Kick Off
Chapter 49 - Only One Stabbing
Chapter 50 - Good Shots
Chapter 51 - Ethnic Dress
Chapter 52 - Small Victories
Chapter 53 - Right to ‘Load and Go’?
Chapter 54 - The Climax Draws Near …
Chapter 55 - Negative
Chapter 56 - Fallout
Chapter 57 - Booze or Pot?
Chapter 58 - Too Quick?
Chapter 59 - From One Extreme …
Chapter 60 - Driving for the LAS (For Dummies) Part I (Assessment)
Chapter 61 - Driving for the LAS (For Dummies) Part 2 (Training)
Chapter 62 - Driving for the LAS (For Dummies) Part 3 (The Real Deal)
Chapter 63 - Bombs, Bongs and Dive-bombing
Chapter 64 - Shouldn’t You Be Dead?
Chapter 65 - Crunch … Crunch … Crunch … Masked Symptoms
Chapter 66 - An Excellent Bad Day
Chapter 67 - Broken Ambulances
Chapter 68 - An Apology to A&E Departments
Chapter 69 - Knee Trouble
Chapter 70 - Drunk and Disorderly
Chapter 71 - Favourite Job
Chapter 72 - Notting Hill – Stabby, Stabby
Chapter 73 - Sad Stories That Stay With You
Chapter 74 - Update on Last Posting
Chapter 75 - Tricky Extraction
Chapter 76 - Cannibals, Schizophrenics and Hermaphrodites (Oh My …)
Chapter 77 - Holy Joe’s
Chapter 78 - Assaulted and Happy About It
Chapter 79 - Dead Babies
Chapter 80 - GCS 3/15 Outside The Door
Chapter 81 - Protecting Little Old Men From The Police?
Chapter 82 - Victims
Chapter 83 - Behind Locked Doors
Chapter 84 - Substitute
Chapter 85 - Nicked
Chapter 86 - More Nicked
Chapter 87 - You Decide
Chapter 88 - Dragging
Chapter 89 - Sedation
Chapter 90 - Patient Gets Better!!!
Chapter 91 - Safety Net
Chapter 92 - A Hidden Pregnancy
Chapter 93 - Upsetting
Chapter 94 - Therapy?
Chapter 95 - Dog Teams
Chapter 96 - Perils of Drinking (Number I in a Series of 230)
Chapter 97 - Security
Chapter 98 - Major Incident Cover
Chapter 99 - Phonetic
Chapter 100 - Odds and Ends
Chapter 101 - A Changed Role (the Secret is Out)
Chapter 102 - First Night
Chapter 103 - Major Food Poisoning Incident – D&V Part 2
Chapter 104 - Shopping
Chapter 105 - Mobile Phones
Chapter 106 - Standby
Chapter 107 - Worthwhile (For a Change)
Chapter 108 - Happiness is a Warm Pizza
Chapter 109 - How to Blog and Not Lose Your Job
Chapter 110 - Fit
Chapter 111 - 45+
Chapter 112 - Return Job
Chapter 113 - Hoaxes
Chapter 114 - Masking Histories
Chapter 115 - Carrots
Chapter 116 - Doorknob
Chapter 117 - Short-Term Memory Loss
Chapter 118 - Liars
Chapter 119 - Can’t Touch Her
Chapter 120 - HAI
Chapter 121 - Flat
Chapter 122 - Dentist
Chapter 123 - Radiating Pain
Chapter 124 - Values
Chapter 125 - Rough
Chapter 126 - Whether the Weather
Chapter 127 - Recognised
Chapter 128 - Decomp
Chapter 129 - Matern-a-water-taxis
Chapter 130 - Little Things
Chapter 131 - A Happy Job (For a Change)
Chapter 132 - Physician Response Unit
Chapter 133 - Nowt
Chapter 134 - Tesco
Chapter 135 - Scum
Chapter 136 - Overturned
Chapter 137 - A New Definition
Chapter 138 - An Hour to Go
Chapter 139 - Get Them When They Are Young
Chapter 140 - Not Breathing
Chapter 141 - Knife Time (Well, Actually a Sword, But You Know What I Mean …)
Chapter 142 - Knife Time II
Chapter 143 - Knife Time III
Chapter 144 - Flat
Chapter 145 - Broomstick
Chapter 146 - Apologies to All Police
Chapter 147 - Tongue
Chapter 148 - Multiple Explosions in London – July 7, 2005
Chapter 149 - Today – July 7,2005
Chapter 150 - Normality-July 8, 2005
Chapter 151 - How to Get Gassed
Chapter 152 - Contaminated
Chapter 153 - 8:30
Chapter 154 - Street Resus’
Chapter 155 - Things to Do When Hit By a Car …
Chapter 156 - Handbags
Chapter 157 - Again?
Chapter 158 - Decon
Chapter 159 - Raised
Chapter 160 - Shifting Resources
Chapter 161 - And … Relax …
Chapter 162 - A Moment of Zen
Chapter 163 - Bit Of A Surprise
Chapter 164 - Bad Job
Chapter 165 - Multiple Trauma and Floppy Children
Chapter 166 - Internet Saves Girl!
Chapter 167 - Sheer Bloody Terror
Chapter 168 - The Benefits of Lovely Weather
Chapter 169 - Waitrose
Chapter 170 - Sorry
Chapter 171 - Saved One!
Chapter 172 - A Call to Arms
Chapter 173 - Mercy! MRSA!
Chapter 174 - 80/50
Chapter 175 - Unconscious? (Tricks of the Trade)
Chapter 176 - Reprieve
Chapter 177 - More
Chapter 178 - Surprise
Chapter 179 - Wake-up Call
Chapter 180 - ‘Care’ Home
Chapter 181 - Epileptic Fit
Chapter 182 - Community Relations
Chapter 183 - Seven Witnesses
Chapter 184 - Breathless
Chapter 185 - Soft, Wet Snooker Ball
Chapter 186 - The Humanity of Bystanders
Chapter 187 - Crying
Chapter 188 - Night Number One
Chapter 189 - Monkey Balls, Loss of …
Chapter 190 - Sickle Cell
Chapter 191 - IQ Test
Chapter 192 - How It Should Be Done
Chapter 193 - No Tax Disc
Chapter 194 - Gah!
Chapter 195 - Tickets
Chapter 196 - Health Forecasts
Chapter 197 - We Sometimes Do Good Work
Chapter 198 - R+J = GBH?
Chapter 199 - The Friday Before Christmas
Chapter 200 - Panic on the Streets of London
Chapter 201 - Rant Alert! Rant Alert!
Chapter 202 - Why I Hate Smoking Parents
Chapter 203 - Can’t be Bothered
Chapter 204 - Spaces
Chapter 205 - Happy Christmas …
Chapter 206 - Lexicon of the LAS (or what ‘punter’ means)
Acknowledgements
Copyright
About the Publisher
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