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Index
Title Page
Contents
Copyright
Author’s note
1. Say My Name
2. The Distressing Things People Do for Distressed Wood
3. Please Leave a Message
4. The Sacred Art of Lesbian Juggling
5. Sacrilicious
6. Are You Sitting Comfortably?
7. How to Win Friends and Infuriate People
8. Fraternising in the Workplace
9. Lifestyles of the Rich and Shameless
10. Recreational Darts
11. Baby Names
12. No
13. Nobody Reads Any More
14. Congratulations if You Get the Reference
15. Clubbed to Death
16. Oh, Deccie, Oh, Deccie, Oh, Deccie!
17. Taking Out the Trash
18. Pandamonium
19. Damage Assessment
20. The Traffic is Murder
21. Smithfield’s Other Horse Market
22. They’re Not Allowed to Print it if it Isn’t True
23. Title Fight
24. Kübler-Ross Remodelled
25. Trying Times and Victimless Crimes
26. Meat Meet
27. One Way or the Other He’s Getting Screwed
28. Twenty-First-Century Rear Windowing
29. The View is Nice, the Fall is Not
30. Three and a Half People
31. Inevitable Gorillas
32. It’s the Quiet Ones You Have to Watch
33. Endangered Species
34. The KLF
35. Fallen Heroes
36. Dented Hopes
37. Penguins to the Slaughter
38. It’s a Lot Easier to Get Down than to Get Up
39. The Golden Boy
40. Equidistant Triangles, Fucknuggets!
41. Bus Lane Diplomacy
42. La Reveal Magnifico (This is a Dan Hanzus Shoutout!)
43. An Eerie Silence
44. Surprise!
45. The Traffic Really is Murder
46. Told You – It Really is the Quiet Ones You Have to Watch
47. A Bad Day to Die
48. Fraternisation with the Criminally Insane
49. Ah, Might as Well Jump!
50. Partners in Crime
51. Dogged Determination
Epilogue – In Case You Were Wondering
Free Book
Also by Caimh McDonnell
The Stranger Times: C.K. McDonnell
Eagle-Eyed Legends
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