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Imperial Library
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Index
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Contents
Things You Only Know if Both Your Parents Are Dead
The Murderer Who Came to Tea
Twitch.tv
Ribs
List of Fears: A List
Adult Size Large
24 Stories From the Middle of the Desert
Swoosh
PCM (Per Calendar Month)
Hot Sauce Capitalism
Wayne Rooney Is the Main Antagonist of My Life
That Time I Invented Sitting Down
I Have the Monopoly
Hallowe’en ’96
I Will Never Be as Tough as Pitbull
The Tao of Dog Piss
Why Rocky IV Is the Greatest Ever Rocky Film and Therefore by Extension the Greatest Film in History: an Imaginary Ted Talk
Eyemask: A Review
I Went to Barcelona and All I Got Was This Handjob From a Sex Robot
Hey: Am I a Leather Jacket Guy?
All the Fights I’ve Lost
At Home, in the Rain
Moustache Rider
Running Alongside the Wagon
Footnotes
Acknowledgements
About the Publisher
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