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Index
Cover
Title
Contents
Introduction and Acknowledgment: Fourth Edition
Part I: Foundations
Program Notes
Rules of Engagement
STOP Program Video Information
Typologies of Domestic Violence Offenders
The Context of Competence
Pacing and Leading
Provisional Status Policy (Group Leaders’ Version)
Shame-o-Phobia: Why Men Fear Therapy
Approaching the Unapproachable—Therapist Self-Disclosure to De-Shame Male Clients
What Men Want From DV Groups
Part II: Orientation Information
The STOP Program Q&A
Typical Questions and Concerns
Provisional Status Policy (Group Members’ Version)
The 15 Commandments of STOP
Gratitudes
Mindfulness in Everyday Life
Feelings Count
Part III: New Member Sessions
House of Abuse
Time-Out
Time-Out Information for Partners
When Your Partner Blocks Your Path
Part IV: Core Curriculum
Anger & Aggression
Session 1: The Red Flags of Anger & Abuse
The Cycle of Abuse
The Red Flags of Anger
The Four-Square Technique
Red Flags Chart
Session 2: Anatomy of Power & Control
Power & Control Wheel
Threats & Intimidation
Revising Personal Stories
Session 3: Self-Talk and Personal Stories
Bad Rap Worksheet
Bad Rap
Bad Rap Quiz
Examples of Anger-Producing Self-Talk
Session 4: Masculinity Traps
Men Are Supposed To . . .
Masculinity Traps
Session 5: Masculinity Traps: Fathers & Good Men
Guidelines for Good Men
Session 6: Jealousy & Misinterpretations
Jealousy
Misinterpretations
Session 7: Normative Male Alexithymia
Normative Male Alexithymia
Anger Is A Secondary Emotion
Session 8: Switch!
Switch!
Personal History
Session 9: Put-Downs from Parents
Put-downs from Parents
Session 10: Shame-o-Phobia
The Male Shame Manifesto
Session 11: The Broken Mirror
The Broken Mirror Sequence
Relational Heroism
Session 12: What’s Your ACE Score?
Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Info
What’s My ACE Score?
ACE Resilience Questionnaire
Relationship Skills
Session 13: Assertiveness & Asking for Change
Assertiveness
What Is Assertive Behavior?
Asking for Change
Session 14: Empathy & Active Listening
Expressing Your Feelings
Active Listening
Session 15: The Five Love Languages
The Five Love Languages
Session 16: Intimacy Training: Wives & Partners Group
Session 17: Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse
Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse
Emotional Abuse & Mind Games
Conflict with Respect
Relationship Respect Contract
Which Attachment Style Am I?
Session 18: Your Attachment Style
Can I Count on You?
Effective Communication
Session 19: Apologies
The Art of Apologies
Classic Apology Mistakes
Handling Criticism: Nondefensive Listening
Session 20: What’s Up With Sex?
Sexual Abuse: Psychological & Physical
Masculinity Traps: Sex
About Sex
Session 21: Kids Who Witness
Questions for Kids
Personal Responsibility
Session 22: Accountability & The Way Aggressive People Think
Accountability Statement
Accountability Defenses
The Way Aggressive People Think
Accountability Checklist
Session 23: Stake in Conformity: Protect What You’ve Earned!
Stake In Conformity: Protect What You’ve Earned!
Screw You!
The MAST Assessment
Session 24: Substance Abuse & Relationship Abuse: What’s the Connection?
I Really Didn’t Mean to Do It . . . I Was Drunk
Why Do We Care?: The Relationship Between Substance Abuse And Intimate Partner Violence
Safe at Home Questionnaire, Revised
Session 25: Stages of Change: Where Are You At?
The Five Stages of Change
Making Changes, Pros and Cons
Session 26: Prevention Plans
Prevention Plan
Exit/Relapse Prevention Sessions
Most Violent and/or Most Disturbing Incident
Prevention Plan
Standard Forms
Weekly Check-In
Evaluation Form
Treatment Expectations
References
Index
Copyright
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