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Chapter One “W hat’s wrong with the old-fashioned way?” Susannah Langston could feel the heat rise in her cheeks, but she kept her chin up. She was an intelligent woman, an educated woman. She wouldn’t allow this…this scientific discussion to embarrass her. “In case you didn’t know, Doctor,” she began crisply, “it takes two people to create a child the old-fashioned way.” The elderly medical man gave a rusty chuckle. “Well, I reckon they explained that in my first class. Not that I didn’t already learn that lesson in the back seat of my—never mind.” He cleared his throat. “Now, Miss Langston, I don’t know where you came up with this crazy idea—” “Doctor, artificial insemination isn’t crazy, nor is it new.” “Hell, I know that. We’ve been doing it to the animals for years. But it seems a shame—” “I’m sorry, but I’m not asking for your personal opinion,” she said gently but firmly. “All I want to know is where do I have to go to have it—to get the procedure performed.” He leaned back in h
Chapter One
Chapter Two S omeone had to bear the brunt of his anger, and it seemed only fair to Lucas that that someone be the doctor. “Doc, what the hell game are you playing?” he demanded over the phone. “Now, Luke, calm down. Did you talk to Miss Langston?” “Yeah, I talked to her. But she wasn’t willing to be a surrogate mother. She intended to keep the baby!” He couldn’t have sounded more horror-stricken if he’d been talking about infanticide. “Why did you send her here?” “It seems crazy, I know, but with both of you wanting a baby, I thought—hell, I’m sorry, Luke, but I don’t like either of your choices. I was hoping to kind of jolt the two of you, if nothing else.” “Well, you succeeded. I’ve never had such an embarrassing conversation in my life. Who is the woman? I’ve never seen her before.” “You might’ve seen her if you’d stop living like a hermit. You don’t even come to church anymore, much less the few social occasions we have around here.” “Who is she?” he repeated, ignoring the other c
Chapter Two
Chapter Three “H ow?” Lucas asked hoarsely. He hadn’t intended to break down in front of Doc—or anyone for that matter. He was embarrassed and anxious to get back in control. “It’s simple. You marry the woman.” He stared at the old man. Doc must’ve lost his mind. “I can’t do that, Doc, and you know it!” “’Course you can.” He jerked away from Doc’s touch. “No, I can’t. I can’t let myself—I loved Beth!” “I know you did, son. But that doesn’t mean you can’t marry again. Lots of men do.” Doc moved back to his chair. “Come sit down and let’s talk about it.” “No! When I lost Beth and my baby boy, I vowed I’d never—I can’t do that, Doc!” He clenched his jaw. A man didn’t cry, especially not where someone else could see him. “You took a few hits that year,” Doc said calmly. “After all, your father had been dead only a few months. And your friend Billy died in that car crash in Denver. A rough time.” Lucas shook his head and stared out the window. He’d been doing a lot of that lately. But it wa
Chapter Three
Chapter Four S usannah stood near one of the serving tables, chatting with several ladies who frequented the library. Even so, she kept her eye on the door, watching for Abby and Lucas’s return. It didn’t take long for her to realize something had happened outside that was causing a lot of excitement. Three or four people rushed in and immediately began whispering. When everyone who heard the gossip turned to stare at Susannah, she knew she was in trouble. “What’s goin’ on?” Mrs. Wilson wondered, staring across the room. “I have no idea,” Susannah said, then fell silent. Abby and Lucas Boyd entered the room. “There’s Abby. I bet she’ll know. Yoo-hoo, Abby!” Mrs. Wilson called across the room. Wishing the floor would open and swallow her whole, Susannah stepped away from her acquaintance. Suddenly she didn’t want to know what was causing all the ruckus. Because it involved her…and Lucas Boyd. Whether it was in response to Mrs. Wilson’s call, or something else, Abby started across the ro
Chapter Four
Chapter Five S usannah was feeling quite satisfied with herself. Not only had she figured out how to end the speculation about any baby she might have, but she’d also managed to pull it off quickly. It hadn’t been easy to locate three petite blondes in Caliente. Since Lucas Boyd had fallen for that type the first time, it made sense to Susannah that he’d most likely follow the same pattern now. With Abby’s help, she’d located the three most attractive ladies. But that had only been the beginning. Then she had to convince them to share their moment with Lucas Boyd with each other. None of them liked the idea. In the end, however, they’d all agreed, because they wanted first crack at a wealthy widower who’d finally come out of seclusion. “Did you hear?” Gertie asked as she tottered up to the front desk in the library, two books clutched against her sagging bustline. “I beg your pardon, Gertie? Did I hear what?” Susannah asked, somewhat distracted by her thoughts. “Lucas Boyd. He’s eatin’
Chapter Five
Chapter Six W hat did one wear to reject a marriage proposal? Susannah didn’t know the answer to that question as she studied the contents of her closet Wednesday night. Why had she ever agreed to this meeting? She knew why. It was impossible to look into Lucas’s pleading blue eyes, to know the pain he’d suffered and deny him something that would cost her nothing but embarrassment. Embarrassment that she would suffer when he asked her why she wouldn’t marry him. And he would ask. Then she’d have to explain how painful it would be to be married to a man who could only marry her because he had absolutely no interest in her. And that would be embarrassing because she’d discovered a growing interest in him. He couldn’t consider those three blondes she’d set him up with, because they might tempt him from his mourning. After all, whether he admitted it or not, they were all quite like his Beth. Unlike her. And, as he’d said several times, he had nothing to give any woman ever again. Not sinc
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven L ucas shook his head, wondering if he’d heard correctly. What was wrong with the woman? He offered marriage and she suggested an affair? “Why?” She didn’t meet his gaze. “It makes sense. The purpose of our marriage is to have a child. If I can’t get pregnant, we’d both feel foolish, wouldn’t we?” “Is there any reason you can’t get pregnant? Did Doc find something when he examined you?” He watched her closely, wondering what was going on. “No. He said everything was fine.” “Then we’ll go ahead and marry. I want my son conceived after the wedding, not before.” Feeling he’d settled the matter, he turned his attention to the food in front of him. Not that he was as calm as he hoped he looked. But he didn’t want Susannah to know about the jitters in his stomach. She didn’t respond. When she picked up her fork to begin her meal also, he relaxed somewhat. Before she ate anything, however, she lowered her fork to her plate. “Maybe you should go ahead and…and give Doc some, uh, s
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight H er wedding day. Susannah lay in Abby’s guest room bed, staring at the ceiling. Abby had ordered her not to get up before ten this morning…8:47 and counting. She should be exhausted. There had been a hundred chores to accomplish before her wedding. Including packing. She’d considered keeping her little house, but coward that she was, she couldn’t face either Abby’s or Lucas’s reaction. She and her fiancé had come to a silent agreement at their last meeting. They would stay as far apart as possible until the ceremony. At least, Susannah assumed that was what Lucas wanted since he’d avoided being alone with her. She knew it was her preference. In fact, she was surprised that Lucas was willing to go ahead with the ceremony. Especially since she’d already revealed how inadequate she was in…in certain areas. The expression on his face when he’d pushed his way out of her arms had confirmed her worst fears. The click of the door snapped her from her thoughts. Surprisingly she a
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine S he stood there, pale and trembling, in a simple silk gown in shell pink that brought out red highlights in her long hair. Her teeth sank into her bottom lip and troubled eyes met his. He looked over her shoulder. There were her bags. The wedding dress was laid across the bed. White pumps were beside it. “Frankie must’ve put your things in the wrong room. Our bedroom is across the hall.” “No. I didn’t think you’d want to share a room, since—” She broke off and stared at her feet. When he said nothing, she added, “So I took this one, if you don’t mind.” He stared at her blankly. What could he say? No, I want you in my bed every night. That made him sound like a demanding, insensitive male. “Okay.” When she didn’t move, he slowly reached out and took her hand. She didn’t resist, so he tugged her toward him. “But we’ll, uh, you’ll come to my bed. My son is going to be conceived in my bed, okay?” To his relief, she didn’t refuse. But she also didn’t exhibit any enthusiasm for
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten S usannah prepared for work the next morning, her cautious heart wondering if she could really be happy living with the man she had developed a craving for…but didn’t love, she hurriedly assured herself. She’d learned a lot yesterday. That sex was as good in sunlight as moonlight with Lucas Boyd. That pillow talk provided an intimacy she’d never experienced, one that brought smiles to the bedroom, another new experience. Even though Lucas’s gentle teasing held nothing significant and didn’t mean he cared about her, it represented a closeness new to her. And she learned that she was no more frigid than the hottest salsa served south of the border. She didn’t know why, except perhaps that incredible chemistry between them. Or maybe he was a superlative lover. But he could melt her bones with a look. When he touched her, she had no resistance at all. So, all in all, she descended the stairs that Monday morning with a good feeling about the future. When she entered the kitchen,
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven S usannah awoke the next morning at her normal time. But that was the only thing normal. She hadn’t visited Lucas’s bed last night. He had let her go to her room, and he hadn’t disturbed her. Because he had what he wanted. Oh, how she’d hoped he would still want her. She should’ve known. After all, she was inexperienced. While he’d never complained about her lovemaking, she’d feared he might not enjoy it as much as she. Tears seeped from her eyes, as they’d done last night. She hadn’t realized how much she’d counted on their marriage being real. But she had. Because she’d fallen in love with that ornery man. The father of her child. She dressed and went downstairs. She couldn’t hide in her room all day because her dreams hadn’t come true. Even after the baby was born, she still had to face Lucas each day, pretending not to love him. Pretending not to want him. She might as well learn to hide her feelings today. Besides, the library was closed both today and tomorrow. She
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve L ucas stood over his first wife’s grave, traces of his earlier shock on his face. He hadn’t intended to love another woman. Just another woman’s child. Beth would understand that. She knew how much he’d wanted their child. He hoped Beth would understand how things had changed. He’d loved her with the heart of a young man: naive, tender, expecting everything to go right. But it hadn’t. He was a different man, now. Seasoned with pain and sorrow. And able to love with a maturity and strength he hadn’t known he’d had. Had Beth lived, his love for her would’ve grown to this strength, he was sure. But she hadn’t. Now he loved Susannah. He’d missed her in his bed, but he’d told himself it was the sex he’d missed. When he’d returned her to his bed, he’d realized, shockingly, that it wasn’t the sex, it was the lovemaking. The holding, the touching, the sharing. He’d hungered for the sight of her, for the closeness of their togetherness. He’d loved her. Only he hadn’t realized it
Chapter Twelve
Epilogue
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