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Index
Dedication
Contents
Introduction
Part One
No One Wants to Go Out
I Can’t Stop Listening to “Get Lucky”
In Defense of Hipsters
I Am Hungover Again
I Don’t Know What to Do When I’m Alone
Printers Are Evil
The Exact Amount of Famous I Am: 35 Percent
All the Different Ways I Have Annoyed Famous People
TV Review: Shakespeare and David Bowie—England’s Beautiful Boys
Why We Cheered in the Street When Margaret Thatcher Died
The Rich Are Blithe
How to Handle Other People’s 5:2 Diets
BACON!
The Rainy Jubilee—God Bless You, Ma’am
TV Review: Imagine If You Didn’t Love David Bowie
The Smells of Your Childhood
The Unhappy Bus Tour Guide, New York
Part Two
My Muppet Face
The Two Things Men Need to Understand About Women
Women Keep Fucking Things Up
I Propose Not Having Opinions on Women for, Say, Five Years
A Woman’s Monthly Faultiness
Stop Making Everything Sexy
The Most Sexist TV Show in the World
No More Page 3
Let Us Find Another Word for Rape
Perhaps I Don’t Believe in Redemption Anymore
FGM—It Takes Just One Person to End a Custom
This Is a World Formed by Abortion—It Always Has Been, and It Always Will Be
Oh, Hillary. Suddenly, I Love You.
I Have Given Up Heels. Like, Totally.
The REAL Equality Checklist
Why Can’t Life Be More Like a Musical?
What Really Gives Me Confidence
Women Getting Killed on the Internet
How to Run a Half-Arsed Global Internet Campaign
Slash & Burn—My Life with Cystitis
On the Set of Girls with Lena Dunham: “She Is the Very Thing”
When the Oscars Won’t Be Evil
Mums Are Superheroes
All the Lists of My Life
Part Three
I Love Pete’s Car
Reading Is Fierce
Austerity—They Killed My Library
12 Years a Slave
New York Will Save Us
Syria: A Man on a Roof
The Refugees Are Saving Us All
We Are All Migrants
Swarms
We Need a New News
Je Suis Charlie
Paths
How Wind Turbines Keep Us Free
Russell T. Davies: The Man Who Changed the World, Just a Little Bit
Coffee Is Killing Us
TV Review: Elizabeth Taylor: Auction of a Lifetime—“Not So Vulgar Now, Is It?”
The Frumious Cumberbatch
The Poor Are Clever
Ironic Bigotry—Because Only a Cunt Would Pretend to Be a Cunt
How I Learned About Sex
We Should Ban Homework
To Teenage Girls on the Edge
My Beauty Advice
It’s Okay My Children Do Not Read
Part Four
The Twenty-First Century, Where We Live
The Feminisms
The Future
Epilogue
My Posthumous Letter to My Daughter
About the Author
Also by Caitlin Moran
Book Perk Ad
Copyright
About the Publisher
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