The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America by Kracht, Matt -- Read -- Imperial Library of Trantor

Index

Cover Title Copyright Contents Introduction Section 1: How to Use This Book

The Difference Between Birding and Bird Watching Where to Look for Birds How to Identify Birds Bird Size Bird Shape Bird Behaviors Bird Songs and Calls Ethics Author’s Note

Section 2: The Birds

· Typical Birds

American Goldfink Black-capped Prickadee Bushtit Dork-eye Junco Dumb Western Bluebird Evening Grossbutt Golden Crowned Dumb-Shit Goddamn Song Sparrow Gray Cat Turd House Binch Kentucky Gargler Lameland Longspur Palm Burglar Pine Shitkin Tufted Titface Western Meadowjerk Western Wood Pew-Pew White-breasted Butt Nugget

· Backyard Assholes

Damn Crows Dumb-Ass Robin European Shartling Shit-Headed Cowbird Stupid-Ass Steller’s Jay

· Hummingbirds, Weirdos, and Flycatchers

Butt-chinned Hummingbird Doofus Hummingbird American Dickwood Belted King-Pisser Fucking Pigeon Ass-throated Flycatcher Fuck-tailed Flycatcher

· Egotists and Show-offs

American Redfart Eastern Kingbutt Red-winged Buttwad Scarlet Teenager Western Kingbutt

· Fuckers

Northern Fucker Pileated Woodfucker Red-breasted Shitsucker

· Floaters, Sandbirds, and Dork-legs

Common Goon Dullard Goddamned Canada Goose Caspian Turd Seadull Great Blue Moron Limpdick Solitary Sand-pooper Wood Snork

· Murder Birds

Crested Chacha Great Grey Shite Motherfucking Bald Eagle Pooper’s Hawk

Section 3: Tips for Watching Birds Section 4: Four Seasons of Bird Watching

Spring Summer Fall Winter

Section 5: Extinct Species

Carolina Parakreep Great Ugh Labrador Dunce Passenger Pudgen

Section 6: Bird Feeders

Choosing the right feeder Tray or Platform Feeder Suet Feeder Tube Feeder House or Hopper Feeder

Section 7: Keeping Your Own Bird Journal

Why keep a bird journal? Journals vs. Field Notes How to start your bird journal Tools and tips for writing and drawing in the field

Acknowledgments References About the Author Chronicle Ebooks