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Index
Cover Page
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Contents
Introduction
1. Bears, Cheeseheads, and Tuna
One Ring
2. Time Is a Flat Circle
3. Legs Twitching, Quietly Barking
4. Snow Bowl
5. Quarterback-Shaped Balloon Animal
6. That Calm Inner Plumbing
Two Rings
7. You Always Remember Your First
8. Finally, We Could Have Nice Things
9. Attitude Adjustment
10. Pond Scum Again
11. Schopenhauer on the Fifty
12. Superhorse
13. Legit
Three Rings
14. The Patriot Way
15. Last Season Meant Nothing
16. Chum in the Water
17. Flap Your Wings
Four Rings
18. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
19. Martyball
20. A Van Gogh Underneath
21. Your Team Cheats (or Asterisks Like Ninja Stars)
22. Any Day the Giants Lose (Is a Good Day)
23. Anger, with Sh*tloads of Fighting Back
24. Losers and Sore Losers
25. The Super Bowl That Shall Not Be Named II
26. A Tale of Two Tight Ends
27. “We’ll Take the Wind”
28. Chaos Theory
29. Maybe They Oughtta Study the Rule Book
30. Because Karma
31. Malcolm GO!
Five Rings
32. Defend the Wall
33. Not Bitter
34. Like Some Teenage Goth Girl
35. 28–3
36. You Can’t Always Get What You Want
Epilogue: The Luxury of Ordinary Losses
Acknowledgments
Index
Color illustrations
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