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Index
Cover Title Page Copyright Contents News: 18-Year-Old Miraculously Finds Soulmate In Hometown News: Thousands Of High-School Sweethearts Prepare For Post-Graduation Breakup News: Rise In Teen Sexual Activity Comes As Surprise To Area Teen News: No One Cares About Your Girlfriend Back Home Commentary: I’ve Left My Haltingly Awkward Voice Message; Now The Ball’s In Her Court Commentary: Heaven Must Be Missing An Angel Or Something To That Effect News: 20,000 Tons Of Pubic Hair Trimmed In Preparation For Valentine’s Day News: Area Man Creeped Out By Request To ‘Make Love’ News: New Roommate Hopes Five-Hour Fuckfest Didn’t Keep You Up News: Bar Skanks Announce Plan To Kiss News: Dream About You Not Sexual, Coworker Reports News: Ex-Girlfriend Don’t Want To Speak To You No More, New European Boyfriend Reports News: Date Disasterously Bypasses Physical Intimacy, Goes Straight To Emotional Intimacy News: Nike Introduces New Intercourse Shoe News: Supportive Gay Friend To Counsel American People On Ways Of Romance News: Study: Casual Sex Only Rewarding For First Few Decades News: Horrified Man Looks On Powerlessly As He Ruins Date News: New Six Flags Ride Based On Relationship With Deborah News: SWM May Have Lied About Liking Sunsets, Long Walks News: Goth, Metalhead Overcome Subcultural Differences To Find Love News: Soulmate Dropped For New, Better Soulmate News: Local Girlfriend Always Wants To Do Stuff News: S&M Couple Won’t Stop Droning On About Their Fetishes News: Area Girlfriend Still Hasn’t Seen Apocalypse Now News: Area Girlfriend, Boyfriend Achieve Perfect Mother-Son Relationship News: Area Boyfriend Keeps Bringing Up Scrabble Victory News: Boyfriend Ready To Take Relationship To Previous Level News: Nation Sickened By Sight Of Happy Young Couple News: New Girlfriend Tests Poorly With Peer Focus Group News: Girlfriend Changes Man Into Someone She’s Not Interested In News: Voyeur Concerned About Lack Of Sex In Neighbors’ Marriage News: Breakup Hints Misinterpreted As Marriage-Proposal Hints News: Break-Up Made Easier With Colorful Visual Aids News: Best Man Has No Idea Why He Was Picked News: Wedding Enjoyed By No One But Bride News: Mattress King Selects Wife From Small Wisconsin Village News: Marriage Handled Amicably News: Amazon.com Recommendations Understand Area Woman Better Than Husband News: Husband Still Faithful After 42 Years Of Trying To Cheat Commentary: My Man’s Intuition Tells Me My Neighbor Wants To Sleep With Me News: Lack Of Second Car Preserves Marriage News: Red-Lace Nightie Portends Another Excruciating Night For Closeted Husband Commentary: Honey, I’m Not Going To Stand Here And Debate The Merits Of The First Two B-52’s LPs In Front Of The Whole Supermarket News: Butterfly Fuck-Swing Filled With Junk Mail Commentary: Maybe This Appearance On Jenny Jones Is Just What My Marriage Needs News: Hatred Of Marriage Counselor Brings Couple Together Commentary: My Beloved, Would You Do Me The Honor Of Becoming The Fourth Mrs. Charles Ballard?
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