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Index
Cover Title Page Copyright Table of Contents Dedication Foreword by Lacey Chabert Introduction Own Your Kitchen - CHAPTER 1 - Whore d’Oeuvres
So, You Agree? Fairy Toast Gretchen’s Wieners Whatever, I’m Getting Cheese Fries White Gold Hoops Spring Fling Rolls Cheese and Crackers for Eight People I Can’t Help That I’m So POPular Popcorn It’s Not Regular Guac, It’s Cool Guac
- CHAPTER 2 - Regina’s All-Carb Diet
Swedish Nutrition Bars Are Buttermilk Pancakes a Carb? Your (Angel) Hair Looks Sexy Pushed Back Fetch-uccini Alfredo Mac and Cheese Balls, Because I’m a Mouse, Duh Is Your Cornbread Muffin Buttered?
- CHAPTER 3 - I Really Want to Lose Three Pounds
Just Stab Caesar Salad Boo You Whore-iental Salad Grool Sleepover Oats Three-Days-’til-Spring Fling Cranberry Fat Flush You Smell Like a Baby Prosti-turmeric Latte You Will Get Pregnant and Diet Smoothie
- CHAPTER 4 - On Wednesdays We Eat, Drink, and Wear Pink
I Want My Pink Soup Back! Watermelon Gazpacho She’s Fabulous, but She’s Evil. And These Are Her Deviled Eggs. Burn Brunch Citrus Salad I’m Sorry People Are So Jealous of My Perfect Pink Taco Give Me a Beet Hummus Queen Beet-za Strawberry Frosé, Obvi Not Word Salad. Actual Pink Salad. Do Not Trust These Treats
- CHAPTER 5 - Cramming for Finals
Aaron Samuels’s Actual Mom’s Chicken Stuffed Shells JAMBO-laya Total Meltdown She Asked Me How to Spell Orange Chicken October 3-Bean White Chili Why Are You So Obsessed with MEatloaf? It’s Like, All in Swedish Meatballs
- CHAPTER 6 - Mean Grills (She Doesn’t Even Grill Here)
Amber D’Alessio Grilled Hot Dogs Best. Rack. Ever. Everyone Grab Some RubBURGERs Hot as Africa Pepper Chicken Homeschooled Jungle Veggie Bowl
- CHAPTER 7 - Happy Hour Is from Four to Six
Why Are You White? Russian Regulation Hottie Toddy Test Results on the Rocks Too Gay to Function Cosmo Awesome Shooters High Status Man-hattan Candy You Can’t Sip with Us You Go, Glenn (Hot) Coco Half a Virgin Piña Colada
- CHAPTER 8 - Get In, Loser, It’s Desserts
Cake Made of Rainbows and Smiles The Fun-Fetchy Cake Face Smells Like a Foot Peppermint Bark Hump Day Treat: Peanut Butter BALLS Ms. Norberry Pie Strawberry Toaster Doodles Crack Rock Candy Milkshake-It Like 2004
Final Thoughts Acknowledgments About the Authors Additional Images Newsletters
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