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Index
Cover Landing Page Title Page Dedication Epigraph Contents Lie 1: I didn’t do it Lie 2: I am lying Lie 3: It’s an ulcer Lie 4: You’ve beated me to it Lie 5: I’m number three Lie 6: I looked it up on Google Lie 7: Memoir is non-fiction Lie 8: Happy families Lie 9: It’s people crying that puts Dad in a bad mood Lie 10: He married well Lie 11: We’ve posted you a present Lie 12: We don’t have favourites Lie 13: I’m the most hard-done-by Lie 14: I’m your only girl Lie 15: One day I’ll run off and join the circus Lie 16: Ma’s gone to get the messages Lie 17: I’ve lost my mother Lie 18: The man will come with big scissors and cut off your thumb Lie 19: The Da was taken Lie 20: I will not cry Lie 21: I didn’t peek at Barney Lie 22: All he needs is a firm hand Lie 23: Being good makes things better Lie 24: One day you’ll move into the Big House Lie 25: They’re pestering me to have another baby Lie 26: I am your father Lie 27: The Saudis are all bloody incompetent Lie 28: I’m leaving you Lie 29: We’re staying together for the children Lie 30: I don’t remember Lie 31: I forgot Lie 32: I’m Selina Lie 33: School is really nice Lie 34: There will be no morning run Lie 35: That woman is ill-disciplined Lie 36: I have never enjoyed taking a poo Lie 37: I’m going home Lie 38: I couldn’t get him to change his mind Lie 39: I hate Dinah Lie 40: There’s nothing I can do Lie 41: One day I’ll report him Lie 42: That was entirely inappropriate Lie 43: I’m going to kill myself Lie 44: It won’t happen to my child Lie 45: I am frigid Lie 46: Jesus knows best Lie 47: This is the toughest letter I’ve ever had to write Lie 48: I’ll take her home Lie 49: I deserved it Lie 50: Will you go out with me? Lie 51: Nemo me impune lacessit Lie 52: I’m Sylvie Lie 53: I want a relationship Lie 54: I just wanted to return his pullover Lie 55: Honestly it won’t be so bad Lie 56: We’re spending quality time together Lie 57: Marriage is all I want Lie 58: We parent together Lie 59: You’ll be fine Lie 60: Let me tell you a secret Lie 61: We’ll see you for your second course of chemotherapy in a month’s time Lie 62: We agreed a story and she carried it off well Lie 63: The testes are unremarkable Lie 64: I am good Lie 65: It was just a joke Lie 66: Jesus loves me Lie 67: No it wasn’t misgusting Lie 68: Stickers are fair Lie 69: It’s not easy for me to do this Lie 70: Always tell the truth Lie 71: I’d just have to kill some people Lie 72: With my body I thee worship Afterword Acknowledgements Sources About the Author Copyright
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