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Index
Title Page
Contents
ALSO BY JESS VALLANCE
Part 1: During Which I Have an Epiphany
Diseased
Urgent Emergency
A Leak
Planning
Immoral Support
Diagnosis
A Wake-Up
The Epiphany
Part 2: During Which I Am Care-Free and Luxuriate in Hedonistic Pursuits
The Ultimate Bucket
The Plural of Sand
Nobby, Petal and Brenda
Soft
Hapy Brthdax, Til
Camp Matilda
Queen of Spades
Badger
The Greatest of Ease
Rush
Say Cheese
Ollie
Post
Part 3: During Which I Visit the City of Light and My Grandmother Becomes an Unwitting Internet Sensation
Mini-Break
Nan on Tour
Dogs Cats Zebra
Mona Lisa
Other Plans
Happy-Face Nan
Part 4: During Which I Consider the Unlikely Hypothesis That I Am, in Fact, a People Person
News
Goodbye
Interpersonal Relationships
Library Sarah
Great English Classics
Requited
Not Indifferent
Such a Fan
Reboot
Better Than Nothing
Date Night
Sold Out
Busted
To Infinity
An Outing
People
Making Friends
My Idols
Part 5: During Which I Learn How to Have Fun, for Crying Out Loud
Gathering
Prophecy
Oversharing
Like Disgusting
Strangers
The Flat
The Way They Did Things
While You Can
The List
Good Night
Vicky
Enjoyment
Help a Fellow Person
William
Results Day
Screaming and Hugging
Candles
Part 6: During Which I Discover My Entrepreneurial Spirit and Learn to Converse With the Departed
Money
Everyone’s Invited
Nagging
The Spirit Whisperer
Madame Violet Verano
Down to Business
Restructuring
Black and White
Paying Customers
Going Concern
Not Going Back
Business Trouble
Mrs c Gunn
Difficult Customer
Part 7: During Which My Three-Year-Old Brother and I Form an Unlikely Private Investigation Partnership
Google
Tiny Tigers
Tension
Further Investigations
A Recruit
Market Research
Conscience
The Truth
Part 8: During Which I Realise a Number of People, Myself Included, Are Not That Great
Rescue
Part 9: During Which I Make a New, Altogether More Important, List and Begin Work on It at Once
A New List
Freshers
Spider
The Future
To Be Perfectly Honest Extract
Jess Vallance
Copyright
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