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Index
Cover Title Page Dedication Contents 1 - Please Stop Standing on the Toilet Seats 2 - Please Don’t Encourage the Cat to Lick You 3 - Please Fix the Lighting in the Boys’ Bathroom So We Can See Our Reflections Better 4 - The Pole in the Community Room Is Not for Pole Dancing 5 - Please Ban Country Music from All Future Dances 6 - Sequined Camouflage Is Not Appropriate at School 7 - We Are Too Old for Picture Day 8 - The Fart Squad Needs to Be Disbanded 9 - The Storage Shed Is Not for Kissing Behind 10 - Prevent Locker Juice: DO NOT Leave Food in Your Locker Over Break 11 - Please Stop Giving False Impressions 12 - Secret Santa Presents Should Come from the Heart, Not the Fruit Bowl 13 - Secret Santas Are Offensive 14 15 - Welcome-Back Hugs Should Be Limited to Five Seconds 16 - If You Are Going to Share Details About Your Love Life, Please Learn the Bases 17 18 - Please Do Not Abuse the Suggestion Box 19 - Please Try to Spend More Energy on Stuff That Matters 20 - Please Don’t Take Your Bad Day Out on Innocent People 21 - To The People at This School Who Have Been Acting Depressed Lately: Don’t Stop Believing 22 - Instead of a Complaint, Here’s a Tip: Seize the Day! Acknowledgments Copyright
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