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TITLE PAGE AUTHOR’ NOTE COPYRIGHT THE DOOR I’M JUST NO GOOD AT RHYMING THE ISLAND WHERE EVERYONE’S TOBY GROWN-UPS ARE BETTER (I) THE GOOD-CHILD TEST ALPHABET BOOK (BY THE LAZIEST ARTIST IN THE WORLD) THE ONE-EYED ORR IF YOU EVER HAVE TO MEMORIZE A POEM OF TWENTY LINES OR LONGER AND DELIVER IT TO YOUR CLASS, THEN THIS IS A PRETTY GOOD CHOICE TOASTED KNIGHT FOR LUNCH AGAIN? MY DESSERT TUMMY THE DUEL THE GECKO YOU’LL NEVER FEEL AS TALL AS WHEN YOU’RE TEN THE FROG RACE THE LAST TIME I EVER WENT DOWN TO BREAKFAST WITHOUT MAKING MY BED A SHORT SAGA HEY, KIDS! GET YOUR PARENTS TO READ YOU THIS POEM! ’TIS BETTER . . . THE POEM THAT’S TITLED “THE DOOR” YESTERDAY’S TOMORROW THE CYCLOPS JUST GOT GLASSES THE HUNGRY GIRAFFE NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE (THE TEACHER AND THE CHILD) THE INCREDIBLE STORY OF THE DAY THE GLISTENING CITY OF SAN FRANCISCO WAS SAVED FROM CERTAIN DESTRUCTION BY A LOWLY SNAIL THE SWEETEST LULLABY EVER (FOR PARENTS TO TELL THEIR CHILDREN) CHOCOLATE FOR BREAKFAST SOMEBODY STOLE MY BAGEL’S HOLE HOW THE FOURTH GRADER COMMUNICATES RE-VERSE SOMETIMES I DON’T WANT TO SHARE DEEP IN THE LAND OF CA’NAROT INFINITY POEM THE UNIPEDE THE RACE FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE? THE WHYDOO INSIDE YOU THE VALLEYS SHAPE THE MOUNTAINS LIVE EACH DAY LIKE IT’S YOUR LAST GROWN-UPS ARE BETTER (II) THE SHORTEST ANACONDA IN THE WORLD DISNEYLAND HAD NOTHING ON THIS PLACE THE OLD WOMAN WHO LIVED IN ACHOO THE LITTLE HURTS WHAT HAPPENED TO US MONSTERS? (THE MUMMY’S LAMENT) THE REMARKABLE AGE JUST BECAUSE I’M A TURKEY SANDWICH AND SOME CHIPS DOESN’T MEAN I DON’T HAVE FEELINGS TOO, YOU KNOW! HEY, WE FINALLY FOUND SOMEONE WHO KNOWS THAT STORY ABOUT THE SNAIL WHO SAVED SAN FRANCISCO! EIGHT EPILOGUE THE SECRET OF MY ART THE POEM THAT’S TITLED “THE POEM THAT’S TITLED ‘THE DOOR’” LUCK I’M SHY ON THE OUTSIDE THE LEMONADE STAND STAND I LOVE QUIET TWO ROADS JACK SPRAT (UPDATED) ROLLER COASTER + EARTHQUAKE = ? THE ARGUMENT TRAPPED! UNFAIR RIDDLE #1 UNFAIR RIDDLE #2 UNFAIR RIDDLE #3 THE INVISIBLE HORSE GOOD THINGS JACK MAKES A FATAL STRATEGIC BLUNDER THE WORLD’S BEST OFFER THE NURSERY RHYME “LITTLE BOY BLUE,” WITH SOME WORDS REPLACED BY DELICIOUS GREEK FOOD NEVER SWITCH YOUR LAUNDRY DETERGENT WITH YOUR DISHWASHER DETERGENT THE ABDOMINAL SNOWMAN NOTHING RHYMES WITH DUTHING THE MONSTER UNDER MY BED INSTEAD IS DEAD PICTURE PUZZLE! TEN GINORMOUS HIPPOS JUMPED ON A BED I DON’T LIKE MY ILLUSTRATOR YES MEANS NO AND NO MEANS YES… I’M ALWAYS HAPPY IN MY ROOM THE RULES OF “TIC” THE POEM THAT’S TITLED “THE POEM THAT’S TITLED ‘THE POEM THAT’S TITLED ‘THE DOOR’’” JUST BE YOURSELF THE INCREDIBLE BARGAIN I’M OLD FOR MY AGE HOW TO DESIGNATE AN UNGULATE THE WAY WE’RE ALL THE SAME OUT ON THE FARM ON A SATURDAY NIGHT A COLD-AIR BALLOON WHAT? YOU THINK I HAVE A BAD MEMORY? GROWN-UPS ARE BETTER (III) I AM NOT EVEN GOING TO TALK ABOUT THIS NEXT THING THE NEW BAD WORD WORST. BIRTHDAY PARTY. EVER. SALLY THE CENTIPEDE GETS HER SHOES ON TO TAKE A WALK WITH HER MOM UNDER MY DRAGON’S WING ON THE OTHER HAND, THEY BOTH HATE DANDELIONS EVEN THE BUTTERFLY MORAL: IF IT’S NOT YOUR MAGIC WAND, LEAVE IT ALONE THE ICE CREAM MONDAE L-O-V-E JIGSAW PUZZLE DIFFICULTY CHART THE POEM THAT’S TITLED “THE POEM THAT’S TITLED ‘THE POEM THAT’S TITLED ‘THE POEM THAT’S TITLED ‘THE DOOR’’’” THE LATEST BEDTIME OF ALL THE LOSER’S CHEER THE CHILD’S FAREWELL THE PARENT’S RESPONSE ON MY INTENTIONS OF EXPANDING MY EXPERIENCES EATING GARDEN CUISINE, WITH AN APPROXIMATE TIME FRAME INCLUDED LET’S MEET RIGHT HERE IN TWENTY-FIVE YEARS UM, YOU CAN STOP READING NOW. THAT WAS THE LAST POEM. OOPS, THAT ACCIDENTALLY RHYMED. OKAY, SO THAT WAS THE LAST POEM. BUT THERE ARE ABSOLUTELY NO MORE FROM HERE. SO STOP READING. DARN IT! I’M JUST NO GOOD AT NOT RHYMING. BUT I’M TELLING YOU, THIS IS REALLY THE END! INDEX OF TITLES (IN THE BOOK) OUTDEX (OF TITLES THAT DID NOT MAKE THE FINAL CUT) ACKNOWLEDGMENTS ABOUT THE AUTHORS
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