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Imperial Library
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Index
Introduction
In the Beginning
The Power Play
New Beginnings
The Choo Breakthrough
Baby Chick Dave
Getting Creative
1 Asleep in Vegas
Reverting to Form, Vegas Style
Morning Weirdness
This Stays in Vegas
2 River Cruising Unscripted
Lazy Boy Cruising
Cougar Grandma
Wertheim Is for Glass
Martinis and Missiles
Siegfried’s Mechanical Beasts
3 Buddy the Sheep
The Taiwanese Infiltrator
Don’t Call Me Buddy
Doing Hard Time in the Pen
4 Unscripted Food Adventures in Spain
Yes, We Have No Oranges
The Joy of Tapas
5 Vietnam Unscripted
Aviation Lust
Rickshaw Shakedown
A Second Wind for Ho Chi Minh
Wrecked But Not Wrecked
Craziness at Apocalypse Now
6 Murphy’s International Fitness Plan
Recognize the Temptation
Deal with the Frustration
Embrace the Dedication
Consume Fresh Fish
…or, Just Eat Some Duck Embryo
And Now for the Weight Loss Part
Beautiful, Fit Me
7 The Santorini Shakedown
Shakedown Showdown
The Final Sprint
8 Israel and the Camel Guy
Sensual Sludge
Mountains and Desert with a Space Oddity
American Floookas and the Flying Shoe
9 Target Practice in Taiwan
Medical Drama and the Soup Bath
The Ancient Relics of Taiwan
Chicken Ass and Other Delights
Staying Late at School
Explosive Mayhem at the Beehive Festival
More Target Practice and the Big Break
10 Thailand and the Great Escape
Bug Appetit
Ditching Madame de Sade
Turning the Tables
11 Bad Boys in Bangkok
The Sex Warehouse
A Case of Mistaken Identity
The Two-Edged Sword
12 Today Show Unscripted
Worms and Salsa
Ted’s Brunch
13 The Curse of Kang
Chaos in Israel
Kang’s Occult History
The Curse of Kang–Hyperdrive
14 Are You Smarter than a Fifth Grader?
Kid Commentator
15 Bureaucracy Is Everywhere
How to BS a Bureaucrat
Dealing with the Chairman
16 Dublin Explosion
A Night of Guinness and Smoke
The Imodium Interrogation
Shock and Awe
17 Grand Luxe
Cooked Spam in a Can
When Nature Calls, You Answer
18 The Waffles Made Me Do It!
Bumpy Ride
Workout Fever
The Joy of Belgian Cuisine
Jet Lag and Grey Goose
19 What’s Up, Doc?
The Weirdness of Shared History
(or, It’s a Small World)
20 Cooking with Cookie Monster
Questionable in a Chef’s Hat
21 The Joy of Family Vacations
The Shore Alternative for Vacations: Cruising
22 First-Class Germs
Waiting for God’s Shuttle
Sex for Hire, Ominous Hacking and Other Delights
A Good Game of Twister, Followed by
Decontamination
23 The Cleanest Bums in the World
The Glories of Automation
Emergency Rear-End Response
Perfecting the Art of Going
24 Japan: After the Tsunami
Shelter and Survival
25 Lost in Translation
Rule #1: If you can talk a good game, you can usually worm your way out of an ominous situation…but not always
Rule #2: If you think you understand what you’re getting, you are wrong
Rule #3: You are who they think you are
Rule #4: Different audiences hear different things
Rule #5: Your expectations may be dangerous
Lessons Learned
26 Moscow: Contrasts and Contradictions
Drinking and Staring
Turbulent Flying in Hookerland
Tatiana
27 Making Memories
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