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Index
Title Page Copyright Contents 1. Yes, He Definitely Got My Drunk Text 2. The Sliding Scale of Hotness 3. Double Screwed 4. The Da Vinci of Underwear 5. Captain Filthy Mind 6. A Couple of High-Net-Worth Flamingoes 7. First Class Virgin 8. You Posh Fucker 9. I Know How to Handle a Stick 10. Maybe It’s the Polo Shirts 11. Proven Boner Killers 12. I Volunteer as Tribute 13. This Could Be the Big One 14. I Don’t Want to Do the Conga 15. Dirty Dancing is Now On The List 16. Are My Lips Still Stupid? 17. The Full Proof 18. The Blow Job Department 19. Disney World for Horny Adults 20. I’m a Fan of Eggplants 21. My First Sex Errand 22. Hard-on Chutzpah 23. Anvils and Telephone Poles 24. The Joy of Dick 25. Good Morning to Me 26. Wet T-Shirt Contests 27. My Roommate is Busy 28. I Don’t Snore 29. A Little Appreciation Here 30. Good Cop, Bad Cop 31. Afternoon Delight 32. Homicidal Mangoes 33. Every Cell of My Spreadsheet 34. Greatest Theft of All Time 35. The Sex Fairy 36. Not So Floofy Now 37. Poker Face 38. Sometimes Men Kiss Each Other 39. Never Say Never 40. Trouble for Troliver 41. Mansion Kink 42. Skydiving 43. This is What Libraries are For 44. A Mutual Manhandling 45. Better Than Tacos 46. More Than Handcuffs 47. My Life is a French Film 48. Like Dracula 49. I Hate Time 50. Property of Mark Banks 51. THE ECLAIRS ARE REALLY GOOD HERE 52. Sex, Love, and Camembert Epilogue
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