index

A

Abstract thinking, 171–172

Acceptance, 300

Acid reflux, 275

Active sleep, 255, 256

Adrenaline, 65

Adult sleep, 254–255

Aerobic exercise

      in pregnancy, 50, 148, 288

      in reducing stress, 289

Affect detection in empathy, 81

Affective intent, 109

Age

      chronological, 95

      digital, 140–143

      mental, 95

      sleep needs by, 252–253

      television watching and, 143–147

Alcohol

      brain development and, 30

      sexual abuse and, 183

Allergic reactions, 44

Alley, Kirstie, 96–97

Alliance for the Lost Boys of Sudan, 182

Alloparenting, 14, 72

Altruism, 221–222

      happiness and, 163, 165

Alzheimer’s disease, ginkgo biloba in, 43

American Academy of Pediatrics

      on breast-feeding, 125

      on television watching, 144

American College of Obstetricians on exercise, 51

American Idol (TV show), 15

American Sign Language, 112–113

Amniotic fluid, smell of, 36

Amniotic sac, 25

Amygdala, 172, 183, 231

Andreasen, Nancy, 106

Anencephaly, 27

Anger, 189, 206

      continual, as toxic stress, 154–155

Animal rights movement, 60

Anorexia nervosa, 173

Antisocial personality disorder, 183

Anxiety disorders, 166, 184

Anxiousness in baby, 179–181

Appealing to fixed mindsets, 137

Application, punishment by, 239

Aristotle, 161

Association cortices, 106

Associative data, 7–8

Attachment, 64, 191, 192–193

      Harlow’s experiments on, 60–61

      theory on, 192, 193

      time as factor in, 193

Atem, Jacob, 182

Attention-deficit disorders, risk for, 44

Attention span, 24

      television and, 145

Attentive parenting, 122, 190–191

Auditory perception, origin of, 34

Authoritarian parenting, 199

Authoritative parenting, 199, 236, 245

Authority, respect for, 221

Autistic children, 176

Autobiographical memory, 106

Avoidance behaviors, fetus’s display of, 32

Awareness, 78

      increasing your, 207

Axonal migration, 1

B

Babies

      anxiousness in, 179–181

      attention span of, 24

      bonding in providing safety for, 65–66

      bringing home, 55–56

      cognition in, 63–64

      crying of, 55–56

               reasons for, 169–174

      disruption of normal, 159–160

      exploratory behavior of, 100–103

      exposure to new things, 179

      food preferences of, 37–38

      fussiness in, 180

      having first, 2

      hypnotic effect, on fathers, 128

      imitation by, 62

      impact of, on marriage, 1, 57–60

      leaving alone in pregnancy, 287–288

      limbic system in, 48

      memory of, 35, 63

      moral sensibilities in, at birth, 220–225

      need for face time, 113

      need of, to relate to others, 14–15

      prewiring of, for learning, 62

      prior to birth (See Fetus)

      sensitivities in, 159–160

      sleep in, 69, 70, 255–256

      social contract with parents, 56

      stress-response system in, 47–48, 66–68

      struggle of, in learning to sleep independently, 276–277

      talking to, 4, 125–129, 293

      teaching impulse control to, 4

      temperament in, 160–165

      tracking of language in, 109–110

Baby Blues (comic strip), 280

The Baby Book: Everything You Need to Know about Your Baby from Birth to Age Two (Sears), 262, 274

Baby Einstein (DVD), 146

Baby Prodigy (DVD), 23

Background components of human behavior, 80

Bakermans-Kranenburg, Marian, 236–237

Balanced emotional surveillance, 202

Balance in fetus, 36–37

Baldwin, James, 78

Bandura, A., 226, 227

Bargh, John, 142

Barney & Friends (TV show), 146

Basic Rest Activity Cycle (BRAC), 258

Baumrind, Diana, 197, 198, 200, 236, 248

Bed sharing, 262–263, 268

Bedtime routines, 259

Behavior

      avoidance, 32

      background components of, 80

      as choice, 209–210

      decision making and, 107

      exploratory, 100–103

      foreground components of, 80

      mirroring of, 175

      praising in absence of bad, 235–236

      Presbyterian, 101

      taking critical look at your, 296

      visible, 48–49

Behavioral psychology, 2, 3

Behavior modification, 300

Binet, Alfred, 95, 151

Biochemical rhythms in mothers, 255

Bipolar depression, risk for, 44

Birth defects

      causes of, 27

      DNA and, 27

      environmental toxins in, 27

      folic acid and, 27, 288

      neural tube and, 26–27, 288

Birth weight

      brain volume and, 40

      IQ and, 40

Blended families, 15

Bliss, prediction of, in marriage, 59

Blogging, 3

Bloom, Paul, 221

Bobo the clown, learning from, 226–227

Body language, interaction of, with speech, 112

Body maps, development of, in baby’s brain, 32

Body Mass Index (BMI), 40

Bonding in providing safety, 65–66

Bone mineralization, stress hormones and, 67

Boundary formation in empathy, 82

Bradlee, Ben, 162

Brain

      desire for safety, 60–66

      early development immaturity of, 13

      emotions and, 167, 170–173

      fixation on safety, 123–124

      gray matter in, 92

      hemispheres in, 171

      job description of, 12

      learning and, 122–123

      response to external environment, 6

      role of, in bridging facts and emotions, 230–232

      sensory system of, 30–31

      structural abnormalities of, 91

      survival as priority of, 12–15, 64

      white matter in, 92

      wiring of, 6, 276

Brain boosters

      advertising of ginkgo biloba as, 43

      breast-feeding as, 124–125, 293

      talking to baby as, 125–129

Brain-derived neurotrophic factor, 51

Brain development

      alcohol in, 30

      answering questions about, 1–2

      in children, 9–10

      creativity in boosting, 4

      drugs in, 30

      exercise in, 49–51

      exposure to hostility and, 57

      in fetus, 23–26, 287

      folic acid in aiding in, 27

      impact of television on, 4

      iron in, 42

      male versus female, 29

      neurons in, 22

      nicotine and, 30

      overstimulation and, 127

      parenting and, 3

      Paré on, 27

      pregnancy weight gain and, 40–41

      scientific answers to, 2, 3–4

      stress and, 45–49

      timetable for, 151–153

Brain Rules, 2, 16, 21–52

Brain science, inadequacies of, 5–8

Brain size, IQ scores and, 40

Brain volume, birth weight and, 40

Breast-feeding

      as brain booster, 124–125, 293

      length of, 293

      nocturnal, 267

      oxytocin in stimulating lactation in, 73

Breast milk, omega-3s in, 125

Bullying, 280–281

      television and, 144

Bundy, Ted, 237–238

Burnett, Carol, 280

Burns, Robert, 80

Buscaglia, Leo, 81

C

California Achievement Test, performance on, 9

Calories in diet, 288

CAP (rules), 300

      explaining rationale behind, 300

Career, guiding children toward high income, 300

Cathepsin D, link to intelligence, 92–93

The Cat in the Hat, reading to fetus, 33–34

Causal data, 7–8

Ceausescu, Nicolae, 64–65

Cell phones, texting on, 149–151

Cells

      embryonic, 28

      glial, 28, 91

      migration of, 28–29

      nerve, 2

Cellular biology, 2, 3

Child rearing

      gay parents in, 15

      grandparents in, 15–16

      length of time in, 11

      role of nature in, 10

      teamwork in, 14

      in two-parent household, 6–7

Children

      boosting confidence of, 4

      brain development in, 9–10

      career guidance for, 300

      charting emotional landscape of, 297

      controlling digital activities of, 297

      developing empathy reflex with, 298–299

      development of moral reasoning in, 225–232

      differences in, 6

      in doing right thing, 222–223

      effect of divorce on, 67–68

      encouragement of, 121–122

      feelings in, 169–170

      fighting in front of, 292

      in finding happiness, 5

      getting to know individually, 6

      giving gift of emotional regulation to, 165–170, 215

      goal in raising happy, 160–161

      helping make friends, 298

      ice storm, 45–46, 181

      imitation by, 78, 141

      influences on, 7

      instilling moral awareness in, 300

      listening to parents, 78

      lying by, 223–224

      mental-health issues for, 166, 293

      monitoring emotions of, 297

      morning sickness in mother and gifted, 22–23

      obesity in, 148

      opinions of parenting styles, 247–248

      praising efforts of, 4, 136–140

      problem-solving skills in, 131–132

      reconciling in front of, 68, 292

      resilience in, 181–183

      rules and discipline in raising moral, 232–245

      source of happiness in, 196–197

      television watching by, 143–147

      use of language by, 131

      vulnerability of, 13

Choices, willingness to make right, 223

Chomsky, Noam, 109, 110

Chore charts, 300

Chronicles of Narnia series, 211

Chronological age, 95

Circadian rhythm, 258

Clarity, 300

Clinical depression

      linking stress with, 177, 288

      parenting and, 58

      social isolation as cause of, 71

Cognition

      in babies, 63–64

      learning sign language in boosting, 112–113

Cognitive neurosciences, 80

Cognitive tests, breast-feeding and, 125

Cold, distinguishing hot from, 32

“Cold” decision-making behaviors, 107

College-degree parents, 153

Comfortable, being, with emotions, 200–201

Common fate, principle of, 63

Common value signals, 104

Communication

      neural, 29

      nonverbal, 5, 100, 108–111, 150, 205

      verbal, 100, 108–111, 205

Competition, 154

COMT (catechol-O-methyl transferase), link to short-term memory, 92

Conferences, learning, 135

Confidence, boosting, 4

Conscience, 222–223

Consequences, considering the, 226

Contraception in Romania, 64–65

Control, loss of, as toxic, 154

Cooperative social groups, survival and formation of, 14

Cortex, 171–172

Cortisol, 49, 65, 270, 289

Cosby, Bill, 223

Co-sleeping, 267, 269

Cowan, Carolyn, 292

Cowan, Philip, 292

Cravings, 41

Creativity, 100, 117

      cognitive gadgets in, 106

      impact on brain development, 4

      intelligence and, 105–108

      in play, 131

      predicting, 107–108

      risk taking and, 106–107

Crisis, as teachable moment, 211

Cross-modal transfer, 93

Crying in baby, 55–56

      reasons for, 169–174

Cry-It-Out (CIO) style of sleep consolidation, 260

      camping out, 275

      choosing between NAP style and, 275

      Ferber on, 263–265

      graduated extinction, 275

Crystallized intelligence, 99

Curiosity, pressure in extinguishing, 154

D

Damasio, Antonio, 229–230

Darwin, Charles, 94

Data

      associative versus causal, 7–8

      sources of, 16–17

Decision making, emotions and, 229–230

Decoding in nonverbal communication, 5, 281

Deferred imitation, 141–142

Delay, as enemy, 293

Demandingness, 198–199

Depression, 166, 184. See also Clinical depression

      learned helplessness as gateway to, 155

      marital conflict and, 59, 76–77

      in new parents, 293

      postpartum, 76

      risk for, 44

Developmental psychology, 160

Diamond, Adele, 294

Diet. See also Food preferences

      calories in, 288

      fruits and vegetables in, 288

      of lactating mothers, 38

      paleo, 42

Digital age, 140–143

Digital experiences, dividing, into categories, 297

Digital games, 297

Direct intervention, 207

Disappointment, continual, as toxic stress, 154–155

Discipline. See also Punishment

      inductive, 244–245

      spanking as, 245–247

Disgust, 192, 206

Disney, Baby Einstein DVDs and, 146

Distress, 192

Divorce

      effect on children, 68

      rates of, 15, 292

Django Unchained, 251

DNA, birth defects and, 27

Dopamine, 183

Dopamine receptor, genes of, 92

Dora the Explorer (TV show), 146

Dorsolateral prefrontal cortex, 104, 231

Down syndrome, 97

DRD4 (dopamine receptor D4), 183

DRD4-7, 183

Drowse/arouse cycle, 258

Drugs

      brain development and, 30

      divorce and abuse of, 68

Dry rubs, 197, 198

Duchamp, Marcel, 105

Dweck, Carol, 139

Dyslexia, risk for, 44

E

Ectoderm, 26

Educational videos, claims of, 145–146

EEGs, 268

Effort, praising, 136–140, 155, 296

Einstein, Albert, 122, 151

      brain of, 90–91

Ekman, Paul, 114–115

Eliot, Lise, 36

Elkind, David, 152, 154

Embryonic cells, 28

Emotional changes

      describing, 83

      sources of, 83–84

Emotional happiness, 161, 229

Emotional intimacy, loss of, 290

Emotional landscape

      charting for children, 297

Emotional reactions as reflexive, 209–210

Emotional regulations, 165–170, 215

Emotional safety, punishment and, 242

Emotional surveillance, 203–204

Emotions

      attitudes toward, 209

      being comfortable with, 200–201

      as central, 197–198

      comparing, to Post-it notes, 167–168, 169

      as contagious, 213

      crying and, 168–169

      decision making and, 229–230

      defined, 166–167

      difficulty regulating, 67–68

      empathy and, 212–214

      examining, 206–207

      expressing, 189–190

      happiness as, 160–161

      judging, 209

      labeling, 205–206

      memories and, 172

      monitoring in child, 297

      punishment and negative, 240

      role of the brain in bridging facts and, 230–232

      running toward, 208–211

      tracking, 201–204

      verbalizing, 204–205

Empathy, 221

      affect detection in, 81

      boundary formation in, 82

      in calming nerves, 213–214

      defining, 81–82

      emotions and, 212–214

      enabling, 280–282

      in forming friendships, 173–176, 281–282

      imaginative transposition in, 82

      mirror neurons in, 175–176

      neurobiology behind, 174, 282

      practice in projecting, 214–215

      as reflex, 82–84, 213

               developing with children, 298–299

               developing with partner, 291

      in stabilizing marriage, 281

      success of, 82–83

      winning contest on, 80–81

Encouragement of children, 121–122

Endoderm, 26

Entin, Esther, 131

Environment

      importance of, in HighScope Perry Preschool Study, 10–11

      learning about through self-corrected ideas, 101

      response of brain to external, 6

      role of, in sleep, 253

Environment toxins, birth defects and, 27

Epinephrine, 65

Episodic memory, 106

Eudaimonia, 161

Evolutionary biology, 11

Executive function, 104, 105, 135, 223

      improving, 294

      testing, 148–149

Exercise

      aerobic, 50, 148, 288, 289

      brain development and, 49–51

      effect of overstrenuous, 51

      need for balance in, 51

      strengthening, 148

      stress and, 51

Expectations

      effect of extreme on higher-level thinking, 153–154

      from experiences, 143

Experiences, expectations from, 143

Experimental psychology, 178

Exploration, 117

      babies’ desire for, 101–103

Exquisite sensitivity, 142–143

External environment, brain’s response to, 6

External sensory information, processing, 172

Extinction, 122–123

Extrospective information, 80, 112, 150

F

Face blindness, 115

Faces, decoding, 176, 281

Face time, babies’ need for, 113

Face-to-face communication, 112

Facial Action Coding System (FACS), 114–115

Facial recognition, research on, 114–115

Facts, role of the brain in bridging emotions and, 230–232

Fairness, 221

Families

      blended, 15

      changes in defining, 15–16

      gay, 16

      reading as tradition in, 298

      single-parent, 15

      sleep and, 267–268

Fathers. See also Husbands; Males

      clinical depression in, 58

      depression in, 77

      hypnotic effect of bodies on, 128

      TV depiction of, 57

Fears, 189, 209

Feelings

      in children, 169–170

      verbalizing, 299

Females. See also Mothers; Wife/wives

      brain development in, 29

      release of oxytocin in stress response in, 72–73

      risk taking in, 107

      unequal workload of, 59, 73–75, 292

Ferber, Richard, 255, 263–265, 271, 275, 276

Ferberizing, 263, 265

Fetus

      active mental life of, 21–22

      balance in, 36–37

      brain development in, 23–26, 287

      desire for lack of simulation, 22–23, 28, 287–288

      display of avoidance behaviors in, 32

      hearing in, 33–35

      heart rate of, 33

      learning by, 1

      memory and, 31

      playing music to, 4, 24, 287

      reading to, 33–35

      sensitivity to temperature, 32

      sight in, 33

      smell in, 35–36

      strategic development of senses in, 30–31

      talking to, 125–129, 293

      taste in, 37–38

      touch in, 32

Fighting

      effect of, on babies, 66–68

      in front of children, 292

“Fight or flight” responses, 65

Firmness in punishment, 241, 301

First-person stories, source of, 16

Fish

      mercury in, 45

      omega-3s in, 44–45

Fitzgerald, F. Scott, 272–273

5-HTT in stress resistance, 184

Five years and older, television viewing by, 146

Fixed mindset praise, 139

Flavor programming, 37–38, 288

Flay, Bobby, 197

Fluid intelligence, 99, 100, 131

Fluid intelligence tests, 294

Flynn, James, 97

Flynn Effect, 97

Focus, ability to, television and, 145

Folic acid, 44

      birth defects and, 27, 288

Food preferences. See also Diet

      of baby, 37–38

      establishment of, in womb, 38

      during pregnancy, 41–45

Forbidden Toy paradigms, 242–243

Ford, Harrison, 257

Foreground component of human behavior, 80

Foreign languages, speaking to baby, 110–111, 287

Forgiveness reflex, happiness and, 164

Fowler, William, 129

Friendships

      empathy in forming, 173–176, 281–282

      helping children make, 165, 298

      in predicting happiness, 5, 163

      social competency in forming, 165

Frontopolar prefrontal cortex, 230

Fructose, 42

Fruit in diet, 288

Frustration, 206

Functional impulsiveness, 107

Functional MRI, 92, 107

Fusiform gyrus, 115

Fussiness in babies, 180

G

Gage, Phineas, 229

Galinsky, Ellen, 295

Galton, Francis, 94–95

Gaming, 140–143

Gardner, Howard, 98

Gauss, Carl, brain of, 90

Gay couples, child rearing and, 15–16

Gender. See also Females; Males

      high-school graduation and, 9

General cognition, measuring, 96

Genes

      resiliency, 182–184

      searching for smart, 92–93

      in twin studies, 181

Genetics

      happiness and, 177–180

      on psychiatric disorders, 3

      in sleep, 253

      temperament and, 181–184

Gesture, interaction of, with speech, 112

Gifted children, morning sickness in mother and, 22–23

Gilbert, Daniel, 161

Gill arches, 28

Ginkgo biloba, advertising of, as brain booster, 43

Ginott, Haim, 197, 212

“Giving” response, 76

Glennie, Evelyn Elizabeth Ann, 136

Glial cells, 28, 91

Glucocorticoids, 47–48, 51, 65, 288

Glucose, 42

“Goldilocks and the Three Bears,” story of, 38–39

Goldilocks Effect, 39, 45, 127, 204

Go the F**k to Sleep (Mansbach), 252

Gottman, John, 82, 83, 197, 201, 212, 213, 215, 292, 299

Gottman, Julie, 292

Gourmet parents, 153

Graduated extinction, 275

Grandparents, child rearing by, 15–16

Grant, W. T., 162

Grant Study, 162–163, 166

Gratefulness, happiness and, 163

Gratitude, 163

Gray, Peter, 131

Gray matter in brain, 92

Great Kids (Greenspan), 214–215

Greenspan, Stanley, 214

Gregersen, Hal, 102–103

Grief, 210

Grim, Patrick, 230

Growth mindset praise, 139

Grump factor, 3

Guilt, 192

Gustatorial sensations, 37

H

Haidt, Jonathan, 163, 221

Handbook of Child Psychology, 299

Happiness, 206, 209

      altruism and, 163, 165

      behaviors in predicting, 163–164

      defining, 160–161

      emotional, 161, 229

      finding, in children, 5

      forgiveness reflex in, 164

      friendships in predicting, 5, 163

      genetics and, 177–180

      gratefulness and, 163

      judgmental, 161

      link between socialization and, 163

      marriage and, 163

      money and, 164

      moral, 161

      in romantic relationships, 163

      secret of, 162–165

      “set point” in, 177

      sources of, in children, 196–197

      temperament and, 160

Happiness Equation, 178

Harlow, Harry, 60

      monkey experiments of, 60–61

Harm, 221

Harry Potter series, 300

Harvard Study of Adult Development, 162–163

Harvey, Thomas Stoltz, 90–91

Head Start, 9

Hearing in fetus, 33–35

Hecht, Joan, 182

Hemingway, Ernest, 224, 225

Hemispheres, 171

Higher-level thinking, effect of extreme expectations on, 153–154

High-reactive temperament, 179, 184

High-risk decision-making behaviors, 107

High-school graduation, gender and, 9

HighScope Perry Preschool Study

      environment in, 10–11

      tracking children in, 9–10

Hippocampus, 183

Hoffman, Dustin, 240

Home, bringing baby, 55–56

Home schooling, 121–122

Hope, marital conflict and, 59–60

Hostility, sustained exposure to, and brain development, 57

Hot, distinguishing from cold, 32

“Hot” decision-making behaviors, 107

Housework load, balancing, 59, 73–75, 292

Hrdy, Sarah, 72

Human behavior, as complicated, 8

Human conflict, Big Bang of, 80

Human learning, 111

Human relationships, importance of, 165

Hume, David, 228

Husbands. See also Fathers; Males

      cherishing of pregnant wives, 289

Hypercortosolism, 66

Hyper-parenting, 151–155, 295

      dangers of, 153–155

Hypnotic effect of babies on fathers, 128

Hypocortisolism, 66

Hypothalamus, 48, 49