Embrace the Moments
of Your Life
Every single moment during our time on Earth should be appreciated and not taken for granted. The people we spend moments with also deserve our thankfulness, love, and gratitude. When we embrace the moments of our lives, it gives us a new perspective on the things we may have taken for granted during the normal course of our day—things we might overlook simply because we’re so busy. You might take the feel of the breeze through your hair, the sun on your face, or the song of a bird for granted because they happen all of the time. If you really notice them, your perspective will change and you’ll become aware of them more and more often.
Meaningful Moments
When we think of the meaningful moments that we’ve experienced, we often think of the big moments, the life-changing events that affected us and caused a change in our path or in the status of our lives, such as graduating from school, moving out of our parents’ home, getting married, having kids, the passing of someone you’re close to, losing a job, getting a better job, winning awards or being recognized for your achievements in some way, and the list could go on and on. Some events motivate you to do more with your life, others cause you to pause and take notice of where you’ve been and where you’re going, and still others make you more appreciative or realize you didn’t know what you had until it was gone.
As you’re considering the meaningful moments in your life, it’s also important to look at the small things. Yes, big events can cause big change, but sometimes the little moments can cause profound change. Maybe you’ve experienced an unexpected surprise that made you trust someone a little bit more or a disappointment that made you rethink how you feel about expectations. Successes, victories, arguments, and losses all affect us in meaningful ways—even if you don’t realize the meanings at the time. No matter how big or how small, when an event, person, or situation affects you in a meaningful way it’s an opportunity to learn, to grow, and to connect with your core ideals.
To give you some ideas to jumpstart your search for the meaningful moments in your life, think about some of the following: things that others have done for you that were totally unexpected, places you’ve traveled to and the people you were with or met during the trip, successes that impacted your life, failures that taught you something, and the people you’ve known who made an impression on you or helped shape your life. As you review your past for the meaningful moments you may not have thought about in a while, also remember to purposefully create new meaningful moments in the future.
Awareness of Being in the Now
An awareness of living in the moment, the now, of your life means to experience every single moment with a sense of heightened alertness. It is feeling the vibrancy of life, filling each day with positivity, and noticing what is happening around you. Being in the now brings about a sense of coziness because it gives you an appreciation of the people around you and the gifts from the natural and spiritual world. It is appreciating what you’ve been able to accomplish and obtain in life instead of focusing on what you haven’t been able to achieve. Living in awareness and in the now means you’re thinking about where you are right now in your life and what you’re doing in this moment. You’re not worrying about the past or planning for the future, but instead you’re finding happiness and contentment with what you’re experiencing today.
What does awareness mean to you? By definition, it is being perceptive and conscious and recognizing a situation, fact, or development. When applied to your life, it means to be more in tune with everything taking place. Consider your thoughts, emotions, feelings, actions, and how you react or don’t react to all of it. Being aware enables you to see the truth of a situation, especially if you’re linked to it through your intuition or a frequency connection. Being aware also means to be as informed as possible so that you can formulate your own thoughts about it. For example, if you want to raise your frequency, but you don’t know what frequency is, then you will not be able to raise it because of a lack of awareness. If you learn about frequency and teach yourself to connect to the energy within you, your own personal vibration, then you can raise it because you’re now aware of what it is and how it can positively affect you. The more you know in life, the more of a well-rounded person you will become and the easier it is to be more aware.
If you’re not feeling a cozy connection to the world around you, then you may not be as fully invested in your own story, your now, as you could be. If you find yourself facing barriers to your forward progress, feeling tired and unconcerned with finding the positive, or being more focused on what you haven’t done than what you’ve been able to accomplish, then it’s time to make changes, to notice what is happening in your life, to become more aware of not only what is occurring around you but what is going on within you. When you are aware of yourself as a spiritual being that is made of energy, understand that you are timeless, and are more aware of what you’re here to see, understand, and learn in this lifetime, then you will change your perspective. It’s time to activate a connection to coziness, to feel life with all of your senses, which will help you live in the now. This will help you to see life in a different way; will encourage you to stop to notice the moments, like the rain streaming down a window pane, and to consider what you’re experiencing and how it affects you emotionally and on a deeper, spiritual level. You’ll feel a heightening of your senses during the experience. The more often you make yourself aware, the more aware you will become until it is second nature.
Embracing Silence
Making time for silence increases self and spiritual awareness. It gives you time to think about your intentions and to create plans of action to achieve your desires. When you spend time in silence, it heightens all of your senses. You begin to pay attention to your emotions, physical sensations, and what you see. If you’re not talking and are sitting in a quiet room, you’ll begin to notice other background sounds that you’d normally ignore, like the ticking of a clock, the hum of the refrigerator, or a bird singing outside of the window.
When I was in college, I got nodules on my vocal cords. The treatment was that I couldn’t talk for a month. I thought I’d die! Miss I-Can-Talk-Your-Ears-Off wasn’t going to be able to speak for a month? During the month, I went through about twenty notebooks because I had to write down everything that I wanted to say. It was difficult, to say the least, and when I was able to speak again I did it during one of my acting classes so that everyone could hear if there was a difference to my voice. My tone was clear, not hoarse and raspy like it was before I was diagnosed.
During that month, not only did I heal my voice but I also developed a great appreciation for silence. I noticed more of the things happening around me, more of the sounds that I didn’t pay much attention to before. I also noticed how other people interacted with me when I couldn’t talk. When you’re forced into complete silence, you learn to appreciate the ability to talk and laugh. I learned a lot about connecting with my inner self during that time too.
Embracing Honesty
Honesty, in my opinion, is the most important character trait that any person can have. To live in coziness, we have to be honest with the people around us and, most importantly, we have to be honest with ourselves. It is a choice we make to not lie, use deception, cheat, or steal from another person. Honesty is a code to live your life by. Trust is built from honesty. When you’re not honest with someone else, then you can hurt them emotionally. If you’re miserable because of someone else’s actions, if you’re giving up your real self to be what someone wants you to be and you’re not happy with who you’re becoming, then admit that to yourself and take the steps needed to be true to yourself again. Denying what you’re feeling will only keep you in a state of dishonesty within yourself. See the truth of situations and people as they are, acknowledge them and decide honestly if the situation is right for you.
Simplify and Slow Down
Do you find that you’re often moving at warp speed and still there doesn’t seem to be enough time in the day to finish everything you want to do? Our society is very busy due to technological advancements that make it easier to connect to others around the world. This means your work day may no longer be one shift but could mean middle of the night meetings to accommodate a customer’s time zone. For those of you with children, you may feel even more stressed due to their extracurricular activities in addition to your work. To find your way back to the simplicity of a cozy life, you should slow down and simplify.
When you’re forced to slow down due to illness or some other life event, you start paying attention to the things you were missing when you were going full steam ahead. If you push and push yourself to the breaking point, then your immune system may become weak due to stress and cause illness or exhaustion. Instead of pushing so hard that you break, try to find balance. You’ll be less stressed and ultimately more productive in the long run than if you’re speeding along at a hundred miles an hour without any downtime.
You may be wondering what kind of changes you could make that will help to simplify your life. Let’s go over some examples to get you started. Look at your time commitments and how much you’re multitasking just to get it all done. There are only twenty-four hours in a day and if you’re busy for seventeen of them and get seven hours of sleep, then there’s no time to relax. What can you let go of completely or do less frequently? Find as many ways to free up your time as you can so that there is some time for you. For example, instead of waking up and looking at social media on your phone, you meditate, begin the day reading a few pages from a book you enjoy, or do some stretching exercises.
Try It Now Exercise
Hygge includes being aware of the moments in your life, which is one of the best ways to begin the path of transformation. You have the ability to make a total transformation within yourself if that’s what you truly desire. It is getting back to the truth of your soul and being mindfully aware of the world around you. In this exercise, I’d like for you to select a place where you can watch nature and contemplate what you’re seeing and feeling.
When you take the time to sit outside in a natural environment, it’s easy to quiet your mind and consider the moments of your life. This is living friluftsliv (see Chapter One). Think about the different moments you experienced during the day. Try to go through a few different emotions to see if they occurred that day. Did you have a moment that made you happy? Maybe you saw a puppy or a funny video that made you laugh. Maybe you experienced a situation that made you feel a little melancholy or sad. Did you have an argument or lose your temper? Think of each of these different emotions and the situations that occurred. Can you dig deeper to see why you reacted the way you did to those situations? If you can, then you’re experiencing growth at a spiritual level.
While you’re sitting in nature also pay attention to the now of that particular moment. Feel the moment, the energy of the world that surrounds you, and the way it makes you feel inside. First focus from the greatness of the sky, trees, ocean, or whatever environment you’re in and connect your spiritual self to the spiritual essence of your surroundings. Just feel. Now take your focus smaller to notice more and keep taking it smaller until you notice the little things around you. Do you see small rocks? Is there water, any interesting plants, or maybe bugs crawling around? As you experience the now of your moments in nature, allow its energy to balance you and refresh your mind, body, and spirit. Your observations may surprise and enlighten you.
Leave Technology Behind
Technology is wonderful, isn’t it? With the technological advances of our society it’s easier than ever to get our work done quickly using our desktop computers, smartphones, laptops, and tablets. There are apps for just about everything, from creating a grocery list to maps to find our way around this great big world we live in. There are apps for every age group, for every professional field, for entertainment, and for sports. It enhances our lives, making many of the tasks we do daily easier and quicker to accomplish than ever before.
We no longer have to visit the library to do research; we can do it online through a wide variety of search engines, websites, dictionaries, and encyclopedias. Yet, sometimes, it’s refreshing to visit a library and read through a wide selection of books to learn from the authors who took the time to research and write about every topic imaginable. You can even find rare and out of print books at online retailers. The feel of holding a book in your hands and flipping through the pages gives a sense of comfort you don’t get when using handheld devices, a laptop, or a desktop computer. You can now attend school online, which makes it easier for people who have to work full-time to earn a degree.
Technology has wonderful advantages, but just like everything in life, there’s a flip side to it where disadvantages come into play. One of the primary things that you’ll encounter is that some things you see online aren’t true. You might think it’s true but upon further research, you discover that it’s not. I remember once when I believed a story about a miniature giraffe. Looking back, it’s funny, but at the time I was amazed that miniature giraffes were in existence. Image editing software has come a long way over the years and that little giraffe looked so real! Yes, I was gullible, I believed it, but it taught me an important lesson. Now I think twice before falling hook, line, and sinker. Now I fact-check stories if I’m not sure that they’re truthful. It’s easy to let technology do the work for us that we used to do ourselves.
When was the last time you bought and used a paper map? For me, it’s been years because it’s easier to use GPS (global positioning system) to map out where you need to go. The disadvantage of this is that you can end up in the wrong place if you’re using outdated software.
Another disadvantage that I find with technology is that people are having less face-to-face interaction. You can see two people sitting side by side, both on their cell phones, only to find out that they’re texting each other. Instead of doing that, why not put the cell phones away and have an actual conversation with one another? People often sleep with their cell phones beside their bed or they have their laptops, tablets, and phones in the bed with them. Why not turn those off, put them in another room, and get a good night’s sleep? Some people even get addicted to technology and have withdrawal symptoms if they have to be without their smartphone for any length of time.
Technology is a wonderful addition to our lives. Try to use it to enhance your life without getting addicted to it, ignoring other people because of it, or letting it take over your day.
Social Media
Social media is one of the great advantages of the internet and one of the technological advances made in the things you can do online. Through social media we can stay in touch with family and friends, even those we have lost contact with over the years, and meet new people all around the world who have similar interests. Today most people are active on one or more of the social media platforms. Social media can give us a sense of coziness through connections with others. We can also obtain news stories through social media and keep up with what is happening in the world. Sharing pictures has never been easier, so you can see events you couldn’t attend in person.
It’s up to us as to how much time we spend online. It’s important to know that while social media has tremendous advantages, it can also become a huge distraction. Have you ever found yourself on a social media platform just scrolling down your feed looking at funny videos, memes, or seeing what your friends were up to last night when you really are supposed to be doing work? I know I have. Social media can become a waste of time that we could use being more productive. It also makes us lose focus. When you get so wrapped up in social media that you pay more attention to it than you do to what’s happening in your real life, that’s when social media becomes a problem. Social media can expand your horizons. I have online friends all around the world I have never met face-to-face but consider my friends. Some I have been connected with for years. Some I met through our businesses and I’ve stayed in touch with them through social media. It’s a great way to stay connected and to learn more about your world and the people in it, as long as you make sure it’s not the only way you engage with people. Doing things with your family and friends without your phone attached to you will help you find balance in your online life and your real life.
Try It Now Exercise
Oh no! You did not just say to go tech-free for a week, did you? I must have read that header wrong. I can’t live without my phone! Please say you’re kidding me …
What was your first thought when you read the title of this section? Now be honest. Did you react like the first paragraph above or did you think no big deal? For me, giving up technology isn’t a big deal because I don’t depend on it for my livelihood or entertainment. Half of the time I forget to take my phone with me, which frustrates other people, but hey, that’s just me. I’m not attached to the thing. If you use your cell phone for work, which is the case with many people I know, then you’d have to schedule your tech-free week during your vacation. You can talk to everyone who is important in your life and let them know what you’re doing beforehand; change your voicemail message to say you’re on vacation and tech-free this week and you’ll get back to them when you return.
So you’ve got the cell phone covered. Computers, including any handheld devices like e-readers, are off limits too. Shut them down and put them away. Avoid any opportunities to get online on a public computer. Tech-free means you’re off the phone, computer, video games, social media, and any other technology. You’re unplugged from the distractions of the internet and social media, which can eat up a lot of your time doing nothing. You’re going grassroots, back to the basics, back to a simple life, back to cozy, and back to you.
For many people, technology is all they know. They’ve grown up surrounded by technology. This exercise is going to be more difficult if this describes you. You may think you can’t live without your phone, but I assure you that you can; even celebrities practice weeks without technology and rave at the results they achieved. Sure, your online friends will miss you while you’re gone, but just remember that saying absence makes the heart grow fonder. Now comes the fun part—getting to know yourself better and truly experiencing the people in your life and your surroundings.
So what do you do during your week without technology? The first thing you’ll do is adjust to not reaching for your cell phone. You’ll probably experience boredom and possibly feel short tempered the first day or two. Once you get used to not using technology, you’ll begin to find other ways to entertain yourself and to get information, and you will probably feel more relaxed as you take in the real world around you. You’ll find you’re able to maintain better focus, you’re more attentive to your surroundings, and you’re more productive in your tasks when technology is out of the window. Unplugging from technology can help you get your priorities in the right order, enjoy more time with family, and enjoy activities that allow you to meet new people in person, rather than online.
If you don’t think you can let go of technology for a week then just try it for a day. There are so many benefits to unplugging, even if it’s for a short time. You might even prefer having less time online and more time doing things in your everyday life.
Living in the Moment
When you live in the moments of your life you look at everyone, everything, and every situation with fresh eyes. You look for details that you normally wouldn’t see. If you’re keeping a journal, write down what you notice in these moments. You may pay more attention to the beauty of a sunrise or sunset or the smell of flowers in the air. Songs may have more significance when you really listen to the words.
Living in the moment is easy to do once you get the hang of it. Take a look at your surroundings. Is there anything or anyone near you that you’ve taken for granted lately? We usually don’t think about having a roof over our heads or how warm and cozy our beds are when we finally get to lie down to sleep. What about that hot water in the shower? Living in the moment means to be aware and thankful of the gifts you’ve been given. Think about your mother’s perfume or father’s cologne. If you catch a whiff of that scent when you’re out shopping does it immediately remind you of your parent? Being able to notice that scent and to stop to think about your parent for a single moment in time—that’s living in the moment. If you didn’t have a great relationship with your parent, then acknowledge the scent, think about the accomplishments you’re proud of and how much you’ve been able to do in your life, and then let it go. That is acknowledging the moment for what it is and then releasing it out into the universe so it doesn’t have a negative effect on you.
Reconnecting to your spiritual essence is a way to live in the moment. Because you connect to the divine part of your inner self, you are surrounded with your own positivity and light and the frequency (the vibration) that is uniquely you. This makes living in the moment easier and more meaningful.
Taking deliberate and specific actions will help you stay focused on the moments of your life. Let’s say you’re in the middle of your work day. You’re writing up a report but you’re so tired your eyes keep closing. Instead of fighting it, give into that moment. Let your eyes close and just listen. Do you hear yourself breathing? What other sounds are happening around you? Can you hear the air conditioning or the murmured speech of coworkers? Maybe there’s a clock ticking or someone is tapping on their computer keyboard. Listen to all of the things happening around you that you normally wouldn’t be paying attention to. Now let your mind move into your own frequency and into your inner essence. Let the cozy feeling of being at home within yourself rejuvenate you and refresh your senses. You feel energized, aware, and in tune with your inner self. There is a sense of balance because you connected to the moments happening around you. Open your eyes. Now you’re ready to finish that report and will be refreshed and awake while you do it.
Examine the Little Things
Life is filled with big, eventful moments that make memories that last a lifetime. It is also filled with little moments that can be easily forgotten. Sometimes those little moments can be the catalyst for big changes in your life. Realizations are often spurred by some little action, resulting in moments of clarity.
Spirituality has, at its core, a foundation of warmth and love that is part of our overall well-being. When we are more spiritually conscious, we’re able to change ourselves and improve on all levels, including the spiritual, physical, and emotional. Our self-
esteem soars and feelings of self-worth increases. With it comes a calm peace of mind that can help us be a positive influence on others. When we experience this type of calming effect because we are connected to our spiritual self, we can consciously deepen our spiritual foundations, can have better relationships with others, and do not take things or people for granted. Looking for the messages in the little things can help us grow as spiritual beings regardless of other things that are happening at the same time. Being mindful of these small moments makes them extra special and more meaningful.
How do you start your examination of the little things, those unexpected moments that often lead to eye-opening experiences? Begin by noticing more. As an example, let’s say you’re at a store. If you’re shopping in a hurry you go in, grab what you need, and leave quickly so you can get to the next thing you have to do. It’s efficient but you miss a lot of what is happening around you when you’re fast-tracking it through the store. The next time you go shopping, allow yourself extra time just to stroll down the aisles and look at things, notice the people around you, and see if you discover anything interesting and new. I know when I do this I often end up in conversations with strangers about something on the shelves. You too can have similar experiences by noticing the people near you, offering a smile, feeling the wind in your face or the rain on your arms, or just go for a drive to experience the environment. There are little moments all around you if you’ll be aware and notice them. Little moments can open your mind and heart to many wonderful things.
Minimalistic Approach
The minimalistic approach to coziness can help you enjoy more of the moments of your life. But what is the minimalistic approach? It means to enjoy more by having less, similar to the Swedish concept of lagom (see Chapter One). It is appreciating the things you have and not constantly striving to get more stuff. Is it using what you need instead of having a lot of things that are unnecessary. It’s spending less, doing less, needing less. If you’re unsure if you’d like to live according to the minimalist approach, you can try it for a short time to see if it works for you before taking it to the extreme and giving away all of your belongings and moving into a tiny home. Living minimally means different things to different people, so you have to determine just how minimal you want to go in your downsizing.
To try being a minimalist short-term, you can first start by getting rid of all of the clutter in your home. Clutter blocks the flow of energy in a space and removing it allows the energy to flow freely again. Once the clutter is gone, you can also sort through your clothes and donate items you no longer want or that no longer fit you. Do the same in your kitchen. If you have accumulated ten spatulas, then leave one out and pack up the rest. Go through your home doing this in every room. Put things in boxes and pack them away in a spare room or garage until you decide if you really want to pursue living the minimalistic lifestyle. Once everything is put away then your home will be simplified with less clutter, less decorations, and less duplication.
Now think about the other things you can do without that will also save you money. If you go to the movies or out to eat a lot, decide to cook at home and forfeit the entertainment for a while. Are there other luxuries you can eliminate? If you stop at a coffee shop every morning, try making your coffee at home. When you go shopping, make a list first so you only buy what you need instead of a lot of extras. Choose items that are versatile instead of buying many different items that serve the same purpose.
Once you’ve cut back on your spending and reduced the clutter in your home, then start thinking about how you can be a minimalist in the rest of your life. If you’re doing too much, choose to eliminate some activities. By eliminating stressful situations or people who cause you anxiety, you’ll more easily be able to stay balanced.
Living with a minimalistic approach to life isn’t just about the things you have and the things you do. It’s about cutting back to what you need, eliminating things that make you worried or anxious, and surrounding yourself with people who fill your life with happiness. You may find you really enjoy the minimalist approach, but if you don’t, then just pull out those boxes and put your stuff back in its place. You’ll never know how you feel about it until you try.
Clutter Can Hold You Back
A cozy environment is not a cluttered environment. Clutter can accumulate without you even realizing it is happening. Mail piles up on the table, junk drawers are suddenly filled to overflowing, and stuff is just sitting around. Clutter can be a great catalyst to get you into a cleaning spree, but it can also hold you back from experiencing the free flow of energy throughout your home or work space. It’s hard to feel cozy when clutter is taking over. Organization will prevent clutter from holding you back from the coziness you desire in your life. When your stuff is organized, it is neater and there is less of a mess in your environment.
Emotions can also cause you to create clutter. Maybe you’re holding on to clothes that are too small because you want to lose weight. In a situation like this, consider how old those clothes are. If you’ve had them for seven years, and they’re a size 1 but you’ve been a size 10 for all of that time, then maybe it’s time to donate them and feel happy with your size 10 body. Items like mementos, pictures, and birthday cards from people who are special to you might be things you’ll want to keep. Cleaning out the clutter in your environment helps you feel calmer and more relaxed.
Now it’s time to address the clutter in your mind. When you have lots of thoughts happening at once, it can get overwhelming. Grab something to write with and a piece of paper. The easiest and fastest way to clear your mind is to give those thoughts importance on paper. Write down that to-do list going through your mind. Once it’s on paper, you’ll find that you’re no longer going over it mentally because you have it right there in front of you. If you think of something else, add it to the list. That way you can think about the things you need to think about instead of constantly sorting through a ton of different thoughts.
Letting go of clutter is just like letting go of the things that no longer serve you. It brings balance so you can move forward. You only have so much space in your life for emotions, people, etc. In order for new opportunities to come into your life, you have to let go of the things that aren’t serving you. When you release them, energy flows with positivity, your mind calms and gets quiet, and you can move forward on your spiritual path with purpose.
Releasing What
No Longer Serves You
Just as clutter can sneak up on you and affect the positive flow of energy in your life, emotions, and perspective, people can do the same thing. There comes a time when you should evaluate all areas of your life to see what has accumulated that isn’t serving your best interest. A full cup will overflow when it can’t hold anything else. When you’re holding on to things that no longer serve you, the same thing happens to you. There’s no room in your life for the new if the old is taking up all of the space. Living cozy means to live simply, to let go of negativity and the things no longer serving you in order to find peace, happiness, and joy in all areas of your life.
I make it a practice, especially when I’m feeling overwhelmed, to look at what I’m doing that isn’t working—that is no longer serving me. We can release anything we no longer need, even if it is difficult. It is all based on your desires, needs, and priorities, which often change over time. Letting go of what no longer serves you doesn’t mean to let go of everything. If something has already served its purpose and is now just taking up space in your life, then it probably needs to go. I tend to work too much. I always take on a lot of different projects at one time and sometimes end up doing so much that I find it difficult to relax, slow down, and just enjoy some cozy time. When this happens, I know it’s time to let things go so I can slow down. I’ve had to learn to delegate responsibilities. This was difficult for me because I want to be there for the people in my life. Delegating not only helped me have less to do but it helps others learn to be more responsible.
If you’re not sure how to let go of the things that no longer serve you, think about this—does it make you happy, do you feel like you’re accomplishing something and making forward progress, does it serve a purpose, and what would happen if you let it go? I love lists, so I often write all of these things down, evaluate it, and then make my decision. This evaluation should also include people. If you have people in your life you know don’t have your best interests in mind and are only around you because they want things from you, or if they’re always negative without anything positive to say, or maybe they’re drawn to drama. If any of these are true of someone you know then consider what your life would be like if they weren’t part of it. Would you feel relieved because you don’t have to deal with their drama, their negativity, or their using you anymore? If allowing someone a place in your life is no longer a mutual, equal relationship, then maybe it’s time to move on. On the other hand, if someone no longer wants to be part of your life, let them go.
Emotions are another area where you have to let go of what’s no longer serving you. It’s practically impossible to live a warm, cozy, simple life if you’re harboring feelings of resentment, anger, or jealousy. The two don’t mesh very well. Negative emotions affect you on a soul level, lower your frequency, and can keep you feeling out of sorts. When you release that which no longer serves you, then you’re opening the door for new, exciting, and positive things and people to enter your life.
Impulsive Behavior
Impulsive behavior is when you speak without thinking it through or take action based on how you feel instead of rational logical thinking. It is normal human behavior that makes life fun and interesting. We all decide to do things on the spur of the moment, it’s part of being in the now of your life. We all have gut feelings and intuition that guides us and that can drive our impulsiveness.
I’ve always been an impulsive person. I’d get an idea in my head and off I’d go. I couldn’t begin to tell you how many times I drove from Florida to Virginia simply because I decided I wanted to go. I’d just pack my bags, get in my car, and drive. Being impulsive adds a sense of adventure to your life. It gives you the feeling of freedom, of being true to yourself. Most of us know when to control our impulsive nature. For instance, I wouldn’t take off on a road trip right now because I have responsibilities at home that I can’t shirk off. But if I didn’t and the urge hit, well, that’s different.
When we allow our impulsive urges to overtake our responsibilities, that’s when it can become a problem. It’s important to know the difference in being impulsive and recognizing impulsiveness that’s gotten out of control. For example, someone who likes gambling might allot a certain amount of money from their pay each week for gambling. For the impulsive person who has gotten out of control, they might just spend their whole check. Being impulsive isn’t bad as long as you don’t let it control you. If you keep your impulsive nature in check and don’t go overboard with it, then you’ll discover that being impulsive makes you happy because you’re in touch with yourself at an emotional level and you trust in your feelings. You know what you want, what you need, and how you’re going to get it. Being impulsive adds fun to everything, and impulsive people love having a good time. An impulsive person doesn’t hesitate to be adventurous. You don’t have to twist their arm because they follow their hearts, wants, and desires. Since they often move from one thing to another quickly, impulsive people don’t procrastinate much. Sure, they make mistakes due to their impulsiveness, but boy do they have fantastic stories to tell about their adventures.
Some people prefer to squash their impulsive natures completely. As with anything, there has to be balance between never being impulsive and always acting on impulse. This is one area where it’s okay to be in the middle instead of being too much on one side or the other. In other words, moderation is better than going to the extreme. Sometimes fear can hold us back from acting on our impulses. If you’re worried about what other people might think or say about you, then you may find yourself being less impulsive. Also, fear of taking action can hold you back if you’re afraid of what the results of those actions will be. People who consider the results of impulsive behavior before taking action have achieved balance in their impulsiveness.
The Frequency of a Moment
Throughout the universe, energy is in constant motion every single moment. Energy is required in everything we do, every thought we have, and every physical movement we make. This energy is the frequency of the moment. One moment can play off of another and use more or less energy depending on the situation, which changes its frequency.
Using too much energy all of the time can make you feel drained and tired. This is especially true if you’re around negative situations or people. It takes more energy to deal with negativity because it’s a lower vibration that can pull your own frequency down to its level. If you’re trying to be more balanced, then avoiding negativity is a great place to start because your frequency will no longer fluctuate as much. When it’s flowing in an even manner it’s easier for you to stay centered and balanced.
Emotions also affect the frequency of a moment. If you’re happy, the frequency of the moment elevates and has a positive effect on you. If you’re angry or upset, then the frequency in that moment can lower, become darker, and have a negative effect on you. Negative energy has a tendency to hang around, making you rethink the situation over and over again while coming up with I should have said … scenarios. If you find yourself replaying an encounter with someone repeatedly, then find a way to balance the situation within yourself. There’s nothing you can do to change it now, and releasing the negativity will make you feel better then stewing over the situation. Accept it as a learning experience and let it go.
Another way the frequency of a moment can affect you is when you hold your emotions about the moment inside instead of releasing them. It doesn’t matter if the emotions are positive or negative, that energy has to be released in some way. If you don’t like expressing your emotions by talking about them you could try writing them down in a journal or a diary. Exercising can also help you express your emotions. Walking with a spring in your step when you’re happy or power walking when you’re mad helps to work off the excess energy and gives you time to think about the situation that made you happy or mad in the first place. By the time you’ve finished your walk, you’ll often find you’ve worked off the energy and come to a solution to a problem or thought of something else you can do that will make you happy. Without the weight of emotions that have been held in too long, you’ll feel lighter, more carefree, and in balance. It’s always good to find a way to handle the things in life that bother you and cause you stress than it is to hold them inside where they can fester.
Finding the frequency of a moment can help you feel the energy as it surrounds you. To do this, pick a particular moment to analyze. Perhaps you’re sitting at your desk working and suddenly decide to feel the frequency of that moment. Consider how the energy flows around you, how it affects you, and what you’re feeling. The more you do this the more connected you’ll be to the frequency of the moments of your life.
Try It Now Exercise
In order to allow new things to enter your life, there has to be room for them. Every new thing we want to do, or every new person we want to be involved with, requires our time and energy. If you have too many things going on in your life then you’ll eventually get to the point where nothing else will fit. This is when you have to decide what is working for you, what you want to keep doing, and what needs to go. If something is no longer serving your best interest, if it is negative or draining to your energy, then it might be time to release it. Letting go of the negative will lighten and raise your frequency. It gives you clarity of purpose and is often the beginning of a spiritual awakening. When you begin questioning if something is serving a purpose in your life or holding you back from living your life’s purpose, the truth will resonate within you. Deep inside, you’ll intuitively know what you need to release even if it’s something you think you want to keep.
As you begin to consider what you can release today, you’ll need to evaluate the things happening in your life. Making a list and separating it into various categories will help you see what you need to let go.
Start by looking at the things you do each day. Write down what you do from the time you wake up until you go to bed for one entire day. As you consider what you’ve written, decide if there are activities you are doing that someone else could do just as well. If there are chores or other things you could delegate to lighten your load, that’s one way to let go.
Now look at your relationships. Think about the dynamics of the relationship. If it’s a relationship that you’re definitely not going to let go of, are there any issues in the relationship that could be dealt with and parts of it released so you’re both feeling more at ease? For instance, if you’re constantly arguing with someone over something that, in the grand scheme of things, isn’t going to make a big difference in your lives, then try to pick your battles. Is it something you can ignore or just deal with to eliminate an argument? Can you make your reasons why it bothers you so much clearer to the other person so they can also try to make an effort to deal with it, change it, or ignore it? Compromise is at the basis of every relationship but it has to come from both parties or the relationship doesn’t work. It’s a give-and-take situation and only you know how much you’re willing to give and how much you can take before you’ve had enough. Some relationships you may be willing to let go. If there is someone you’ve befriended at work but who is constantly stirring up drama, which bothers or upsets you, then spending less time with them might be the best route to take. Some people you may end up cutting out of your life completely. In the end, only you know what is working for you and what isn’t when it comes to your relationships. I’m all for second chances and working out problems, but we also have to remember that we can’t change anyone else either. The desire to change has to come from deep within them before it will transform into the changes actually being made.
Next, you’ll make a list of where you see your life going in the next five years. Look back at the previous two lists to see if anything on those lists are things you plan to still be doing at that time. If they are, then those are things you need to hold on to. If not, then those are the things you might need to release.