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Index
Cover Dedication Acknowledgments Foreword Before You Begin This Book Introduction Chapter 1: Facts About Grief
1.1 Definitions
Grief Mourning
1.2 When Does Grief Begin? 1.3 How Long Does Grief Last?
Age of the Deceased Cause of Death Nature of Relationship Other Events in One’s Life Support Systems Resources One Can Command One’s Coping Skills Sexual Differences
1.4 Does Grief End? 1.5 Why Must You Express Your Grief?
Understanding the Grief Process
Chapter 2: Preparing for a Death
2.1 The Diagnosis
Only the Beginning
2.2 Visiting the Dying 2.3 Anticipatory Grief
How Anticipatory Grief Can Be Helpful When Is Anticipatory Grief Not Helpful?
2.4 When Death Comes
When Death Occurs in a Hospital When Death Occurs at Home
Chapter 3: Funeral Preparations
3.1 Why Have a Funeral? 3.2 Planning the Funeral
When Cost Is a Factor Making the Funeral Meaningful
3.3 Selecting a Cemetery 3.4 Burial
What Happens to the Body After Burial? Visiting the Grave How Often Should You Visit the Grave? Thoughts Pertaining to the Headstone
3.5 Cremation 3.6 Memorial Services 3.7 Cenotaphs 3.8 Disposing of Personal Belongings
Chapter 4: Mourning your Loss
4.1 Grief Is Unlike Other Life Experiences 4.2 Disbelief and Shock
Some Ideas on How to Help Yourself
4.3 Denial
Some Questions to Ask Yourself Ways That People Avoid Reality How to Help Yourself Deal with Denial When to Consult with a Professional
4.4 Rage and Anger
Anger Is a Powerful Emotion Does One Have to Express Anger? Know Your Anger History When Do You Know You Are Getting Angry? Prioritizing the Things That Make You Angry When to Seek Professional Help
4.5 Guilt or Regrets
How to Help Yourself When to Seek Professional Help
4.6 Depression
Know Your Own Symptoms of Depression When to Seek Professional Help
4.7 Fears
How to Help Yourself When to Be Concerned
4.8 Panic
How to Help Yourself
4.9 Physical Illness and Symptoms
How to Help Yourself When to Be Concerned
Chapter 5: Continuing Reminders of your Loss
5.1 Public Holidays
Christmas Other Religious Holidays Secular Holidays
5.2 Special Family Occasions 5.3 Anniversaries
Birthdays Wedding Anniversaries Special Anniversaries The First-Year Anniversary of the Death
5.4 Dreams, Nightmares, and “Visions” 5.5 Visiting the Cemetery
When to Be Concerned
5.6 Revisiting Favorite Places 5.7 Unexpected Reminders
Chapter 6: Differences that Matter
6.1 Old Age 6.2 Long-term Illness
Suggestions for Those Dealing with AIDS
6.3 Sudden Death 6.4 Suicide 6.5 Murder 6.6 Extended Family 6.7 Grandparent 6.8 Friend 6.9 Pet 6.10 Sibling 6.11 Parent
As an Adult As a Child
6.12 Love Relationship 6.13 Spouse
The Loneliness of Widowhood
6.14 Child
Abortion Grief as Part of Your Life
Chapter 7: Complicated Grief
7.1 Other Changes in Your Life
Delayed Grief
7.2 Unusual Circumstances 7.3 Unintentional Acts and Far-Reaching Consequences 7.4 Multiple Deaths 7.5 Sudden Illness and Death 7.6 Violent Death
Accidental Death Suicide Murder
7.7 Questionable Deaths 7.8 Shock of Discovery 7.9 Hearing the Death News 7.10 Witnessing a Death 7.11 Notoriety 7.12 When the Body Is Not Presentable 7.13 When There Is No Body 7.14 Secrets Discovered After Death 7.15 “Unacceptable” Relationships 7.16 Dependent Relationships
Spouse Adult Child
7.17 Conflicted Relationships 7.18 Unfinished Business 7.19 Substance Abuse 7.20 Replacement Child 7.21 Unusual Developments 7.22 Missing Persons 7.23 How to Help Yourself
When to Be Concerned
Chapter 8: Unresolved Childhood Grief and Trauma
8.1 What Is Unresolved Childhood Grief? 8.2 No Detour Too Long to Avoid a Cemetery 8.3 Ten Years of Not Talking About It 8.4 The Girl Whose Father Killed Himself 8.5 A Not-So-Funny Joke 8.6 Problems in the Making 8.7 What Is Death-Related Trauma? 8.8 Why Review Such Painful Memories? 8.9 Where Do You Start?
Gathering Information
8.10 Finding the Source of Your Grief
Early Death Experience
8.11 Other Things to Look For 8.12 Restarting the Grief Process
Recording Your Recollections Books Healing Old Wounds Writing Letter Writing Drawing Funeral Home and Cemetery Visits Symbolic Burial When to Be Concerned
Chapter 9: The Road to Recovery
9.1 Helping Yourself Through Your Grief
Diet Exercise Rest
9.2 You Know You Are Getting Better When... 9.3 New Relationships
When Do You Know You Are Ready? Where to Start On Dating On Children and Dating How to Help Your Children On Sexuality On AIDS When a Relationship Breaks Up On Remarriage
Chapter 10: A Friend in Need
10.1 Preparing Yourself 10.2 When Death Occurs 10.3 Funeral Arrangements 10.4 Funerals 10.5 Emotional Help
Taking Care of Yourself
10.6 Things to Avoid 10.7 Long-Term Help 10.8 Writing a Letter of Condolence 10.9 Delivering Death News
By Telephone In Person Looking Out for Yourself
Epilogue Bibliography
General Grief Widowhood Suicide Parent Grief Parent Death for Adult Child Children For the Family When a Member is Seriously Ill For Family and Friends The Death of a Pet Dealing with Anger For the Professional
Resources
Finding Professional Help Support Groups Death of a Child Suicide Death of a Spouse Death by Murder Death of a Pet Illness with Cancer
About Helen Fitzgerald Index Copyright
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