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Index
Title Page
Copyright Page
Dedication
Contents
Publisher’s Note
Chapter 1: Walking with the Monster
Chapter 2: You Know My Story
Chapter 3: It Wasn’t a Long Process
Chapter 4: Not the Kind of Trouble
Chapter 5: Before I Continue
Chapter 6: The Funny Thing Was
Chapter 7: My Mom and Stepfather
Chapter 8: T for Today
Chapter 9: I Was a Junior
Chapter 10: So Maybe It Will Come
Chapter 11: I Know
Chapter 12: But Suddenly
Chapter 13: You Have to Remember
Chapter 14: I Call Trent
Chapter 15: Stung
Chapter 16: Not Only That
Chapter 17: She Sounds
Chapter 18: Let’s Find Out
Chapter 19: But First
Chapter 20: I’m Out of Practice
Chapter 21: It’s a Doozer
Chapter 22: I Will Invite Him Too
Chapter 23: Tonight
Chapter 24: Maybe That’s Why
Chapter 25: Now You Might Think
Chapter 26: So Where to Find
Chapter 27: She Makes It So Easy
Chapter 28: But Playing the Odds
Chapter 29: Several Miles Farther West
Chapter 30: Either Way
Chapter 31: Stockton
Chapter 32: I Locate Robyn’s Apartment
Chapter 33: I Watch Him
Chapter 34: Robyn Greets Trey
Chapter 35: Robyn Is Making
Chapter 36: That Idea
Chapter 37: Why Not?
Chapter 38: What I Don’t Really Get
Chapter 39: I Meant to Pick Up a Stash
Chapter 40: I Purposely
Chapter 41: Robyn Decides
Chapter 42: I Start to Leave
Chapter 43: He Wants Me
Chapter 44: It Is a Clear
Chapter 45: Halfway Home I Stop
Chapter 46: I’m Totally in the Wrong
Chapter 47: I Get Home
Chapter 48: All the Way to Stockton
Chapter 49: I Tiptoe Through the Door
Chapter 50: But It’s Saturday
Chapter 51: Mom Leaves for the Gym
Chapter 52: Scott Takes Off to Play Golf
Chapter 53: That Feeling
Chapter 54: My Dad
Chapter 55: I Expect Her to Say
Chapter 56: Mom Is Still Ranting
Chapter 57: Mom Goes to Change Hunter
Chapter 58: It’s Been Almost a Week
Chapter 59: The Garage Calls
Chapter 60: My First Inclination
Chapter 61: She Opened the Door
Chapter 62: We Leave It There for Now
Chapter 63: On the Way Home
Chapter 64: As We Pass the Counter
Chapter 65: Like I Care
Chapter 66: So Why
Chapter 67: I Tuck That Away
Chapter 68: I Pull into Our Driveway
Chapter 69: Luckily
Chapter 70: Mom and Jake Leave
Chapter 71: Eventually
Chapter 72: Leigh Has Put On a Few Pounds
Chapter 73: Truth Is
Chapter 74: Instinct
Chapter 75: Leprechauns
Chapter 76: Then It Dawns on Me
Chapter 77: Oh Yeah, That Bites
Chapter 78: For the Next Few Hours
Chapter 79: Dinner Tonight
Chapter 80: I Won’t Even Try
Chapter 81: But I Have
Chapter 82: It Is Late Friday Afternoon
Chapter 83: Jake Jumps to His Feet
Chapter 84: I Have to Admit
Chapter 85: Okay, That’s Bad
Chapter 86: Except for the Kiss Thing
Chapter 87: Linda Sue
Chapter 88: Dad and Pal
Chapter 89: Okay, Two Ways
Chapter 90: Dad Carries Hunter out the Door
Chapter 91: Dad Drives Off
Chapter 92: Saturday Morning
Chapter 93: The Hallway Conversation
Chapter 94: First I’ve Got To
Chapter 95: But I Can’t Puke
Chapter 96: I Had Hoped
Chapter 97: The Worst Thing Is
Chapter 98: Dad Finally Calls
Chapter 99: Still, Leigh Agreed to Watch Hunter
Chapter 100: All Spiffy
Chapter 101: I Love Him, Too
Chapter 102: In Reno
Chapter 103: Dad Chooses the “Big Three”
Chapter 104: Dad Really Is Lucky
Chapter 105: See, It’s Hard to Tell
Chapter 106: I Don’t Think
Chapter 107: Party Time
Chapter 108: None of That
Chapter 109: Three Weeks and Four Days
Chapter 110: The Question Is Answered
Chapter 111: I Can Hardly
Chapter 112: I Do
Chapter 113: I Grab a Few Dollars
Chapter 114: He Cruises Slowly
Chapter 115: He Finds a Secluded Parking Place
Chapter 116: I Stop
Chapter 117: Twenty Minutes Later
Chapter 118: Not a Wink
Chapter 119: I’m Glad
Chapter 120: We Leave It at That
Chapter 121: The Rest of the Day
Chapter 122: She’ll Want to Know
Chapter 123: I Don’t Care
Chapter 124: We Merge onto the Freeway
Chapter 125: A Little Girl
Chapter 126: We Make the Deal
Chapter 127: After We’re Through
Chapter 128: We Drift for a While
Chapter 129: All Evidence of Our Tryst
Chapter 130: Always, in the Past
Chapter 131: At Least Kevin Won’t Be in Today
Chapter 132: It Being a Holiday
Chapter 133: Livid Doesn’t Cover It
Chapter 134: She May Be Right
Chapter 135: The Freeway Is Deserted
Chapter 136: We Drift Toward Sleep
Chapter 137: I Must Have Dozed Off
Chapter 138: By the Time
Chapter 139: Mom May Be Worried
Chapter 140: They Know I’m Using
Chapter 141: It’s Late Saturday Afternoon
Chapter 142: I’ve Got a Good Idea
Chapter 143: Not Exactly Forgiven
Chapter 144: November Empties
Chapter 145: Today I’m Coming Down
Chapter 146: Help
Chapter 147: It’s Dark
Chapter 148: No More Sleep for Me
Chapter 149: Brad Is Home When I Call
Chapter 150: I Finish My Shift
Chapter 151: On the Way to Red Rock
Chapter 152: Life at Brad’s
Chapter 153: December Twenty-First
Chapter 154: I Cash My Check
Chapter 155: Layaway Picked Up
Chapter 156: It’s Almost Eight
Chapter 157: One Shower
Chapter 158: It Was a Definite Party
Chapter 159: I’m Crawling Home
Chapter 160: Okay, Not Good
Chapter 161: I Sit by the French Doors
Chapter 162: After a While
Chapter 163: Brad Takes Off
Chapter 164: But What About Trey?
Chapter 165: I Guess I Should Call Mom
Chapter 166: I Sit at the Kitchen Table
Chapter 167: By the Time Brad Stomps In
Chapter 168: After Breakfast
Chapter 169: Monday Morning
Chapter 170: Santa Is Coming
Chapter 171: Around Four P.M.
Chapter 172: Snippy?
Chapter 173: Voices
Chapter 174: Halfway to the Door
Chapter 175: We Spend Christmas Eve
Chapter 176: Brad Is Generous
Chapter 177: Especially as He Gently Peels
Chapter 178: Before It’s Possibly Possible
Chapter 179: I Have To
Chapter 180: My First Reaction
Chapter 181: By the Time
Chapter 182: I Keep Waiting
Chapter 183: Twelve Thirty-Five
Chapter 184: I Do Call Home
Chapter 185: What Is Wrong with Me?
Chapter 186: Turns Out
Chapter 187: When They Finally
Chapter 188: Smoke
Chapter 189: Highlights of the Last Two Weeks
Chapter 190: Every High
Chapter 191: I Haven’t Mentioned the Possibility
Chapter 192: But Lying Here
Chapter 193: In the White Shadow of Morning
Chapter 194: The Door Closes
Chapter 195: A Kiss Falls Softly
Chapter 196: I Still Haven’t Left
Chapter 197: Alone
Chapter 198: One Good Thing
Chapter 199: Brad Is a Little Late Tonight
Chapter 200: The Downside
Chapter 201: Wearing Nothing
Chapter 202: He Doesn’t Answer
Chapter 203: The Problem with Sex
Chapter 204: The Problem with Meth
Chapter 205: Relax
Chapter 206: Part of My Snappish Behavior
Chapter 207: I Know Exactly Two People
Chapter 208: I’ve Tried to Get Over
Chapter 209: We Set Up a Tentative Meet
Chapter 210: Have You Ever Tried
Chapter 211: Sooner Than Later, Brad Follows Through
Chapter 212: He Drops It
Chapter 213: The Roads Are Dry
Chapter 214: That’s What’s on My Mind
Chapter 215: Being Here
Chapter 216: I Leave Without Seeing Mom
Chapter 217: Perfect
Chapter 218: He Wants a Sample
Chapter 219: Too Close for Comfort
Chapter 220: At Least He Didn’t Try
Chapter 221: Wired (Weird) Out of My Tree
Chapter 222: Finally, There’s a Knock
Chapter 223: Long About the Time
Chapter 224: Two Guys, One Bed
Chapter 225: Brad Stirs
Chapter 226: Where Am I?
Chapter 227: His Face
Chapter 228: Brad Has Vacated the Room
Chapter 229: But of Course
Chapter 230: Over a Week
Chapter 231: It’s About Noon
Chapter 232: If You’ve Never
Chapter 233: Unlike Her Apartment
Chapter 234: I Leave
Chapter 235: Easter Sunday
Chapter 236: It’s Gray
Chapter 237: Knocking
Chapter 238: Standing There
Chapter 239: It’s a Short Conversation
Chapter 240: Four Cigarettes
Chapter 241: Just Like That
Chapter 242: All Alone
Chapter 243: No Word from Trey
Chapter 244: We Talk for Half an Hour
Chapter 245: Buzzed
Chapter 246: What Do I Do Now?
Chapter 247: I Sit for a While
Chapter 248: Bright and Early
Chapter 249: Brad Picks Me Up
Chapter 250: Brad Drops Me Off
Chapter 251: I Left My Cell
Chapter 252: Why Am I Not More Excited
Chapter 253: By the Time Trey Knocks
Chapter 254: Waiting for Digestion
Chapter 255: We Seal the Deal
Chapter 256: Clean, Maintenance-Buzzed
Chapter 257: Mom Greets Us
Chapter 258: Surprises Await
Chapter 259: While the Guys Talk
Chapter 260: Halfway Back
Chapter 261: It All Sounded So Easy
Chapter 262: May I Just Say
Chapter 263: The Scariest Thing
Chapter 264: Ultimately, She Agrees
Chapter 265: Baby Makes Three
Chapter 266: Trey Is Gone
Chapter 267: For a Few Days
Chapter 268: Trey Rolls Off Me
Chapter 269: They Say a Picture
Chapter 270: I Am Still by the Window
Chapter 271: Afterward
Chapter 272: I Still Love Trey
Chapter 273: Alive and Throbbing
Chapter 274: The Plan Has Flaws
Chapter 275: Plan B
Chapter 276: One Thing’s for Sure
Chapter 277: The Guy Lives
Chapter 278: Now All I Have to Do
Chapter 279: Who Knew Burglary
Chapter 280: Mom Can’t Have a Clue
Chapter 281: I Locate the Ladies’ Room
Chapter 282: Trey Is Waiting
Chapter 283: Guilty
Chapter 284: Trey Counsels
Chapter 285: I Consider That in the Shower
Chapter 286: If I Want to Fight Them
Chapter 287: When Trey Gets Back
Chapter 288: We Live an Endless
Chapter 289: On a Whim
Chapter 290: First Things First
Chapter 291: But This Time
Chapter 292: Homeless
Chapter 293: Tap-Tap-Tap
Chapter 294: A Second Patrol Car
Chapter 295: Cuffed
Chapter 296: Jail Regulars Will Tell You
Chapter 297: The Officers on Duty
Chapter 298: I Don’t See Trey
Chapter 299: One Option
Chapter 300: Back in Nevada
Chapter 301: Yeah, Yeah
Author’s Note
About the Author
Reading Group Guide
‘Fallout’ Teaser
‘Perfect’ Teaser
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