The Naked Roommate by Cohen, Harlan -- Read -- Imperial Library of Trantor

Index

Front Cover Title Page Copyright Acknowledgments Contents Book Orientation: The Stuff before the Tips

Welcome Students My Reason for Writing This Book How This Book Was Written The Sixth Edition: Toned, Leaner, and Fitter Additional Resources A Note to Parents A Note to Educators A Final Note to All Readers First Page, First Tip, and First Days of College

Chapter 1 Arriving on Campus: So Real You Can Smell It, Touch It, and Taste It

1: Expect the Unexpected 2: Patience, Patience, and More Patience 3: Finding Your Three Places on Campus 3.5: The Five People in Your Corner 4: When Lost or Confused, Ask 5: Be Yourself: Not Me, Not Him, Not Her 6: About Your Parents… 7: Homesickness: Breathe Deep, It’s in the Air 8: Technology: The Fifth Wall Harlan’s Tip Sheet

Chapter 2 Residence Halls: Living, Eating, and Bathing with Hundreds of Strangers

9: Residence Halls: A Cruise without the Water 10: Meet People without Even Trying 11: Resident Assistants: Your Personal Assistant 12: Not All Residence Halls Are Created Equal 13: The Ugly Side of Residential Life Harlan’s Tip Sheet

Chapter 3 Roommates: Good Ones, Bad Ones, and Everything in Between

14: The Ultimate Roommate Rule 15: The Random Roommate 16: The Naked Roommate 17: The Best Friend Roommate 18: The Gay, Lesbian, or Bisexual Roommate (pick one) 19: The Noisy, Naughty, and/or Nasty Roommate 19.99: The Masturbating Roommate 20: The Your-Girlfriend/Boyfriend-Doesn’t-Live-Here Roommate 21: The Lying, Stealing, Klepto Roommate 22: The Drunk and/or High Roommate 23: The Roommate in Need Harlan’s Tip Sheet A Break to Warn You about Holiday Break

Chapter 4 Finding Friends: Your Social or Antisocial College Life

24: The Snow Globe Factor 25: Shopping for New Friends 26: Why College Friends Are Different 27: Friend Today, Gone Tomorrow 28: High School Friends, Cows, and Cats Harlan’s Tip Sheet

Chapter 5 Getting Involved on Campus: An All-You-Can-Do Buffet

35: Greek Life: Getting In 36: Greek Life: The Good 37: Greek Life: The Bad 38: Greek Life: The Ugly Harlan’s Tip Sheet

Chapter 7 Life Inside the Classroom: Assuming You Wake Up and Go to Class

39: To Go or Not to Go 40: Nice Professor, Nice Professor 41: How to Get an A (or almost an A) 42: How to Just Pass 43: How to Fail 44: The Cheat Sheet 45: The Art of Reading (or not reading) the College Textbook 46: Take Notes Here 47: Do It in a Group 48: Old Exams, Sharing Notes, and Mostly Legal Ways to Pass 49: The Major Issue: Picking One 50: Advice on Your Advisor 51: Pick a Number, Any Number 52: Time for Time Management (this will be fast!) 53: Wine Tasting, Bowling, and Other Important Electives Harlan’s Tip Sheet

Chapter 8 Dating and Relationships: Your Higher Education in Lust, Love, and Loss

54: The Rules of College Love (or just lust) 55: The College Hookup 55.5: The Most Important Relationship 56: Close-Distance Relationships 57: Long-Distance Relationships (LDRs) 58: High School Bitter Sweethearts 59: Imaginary Relationships and Online Dating 60: The Friendly Relationship 61: Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual Relationships 62: Cheaters, Users, and Abusers 63: I Have No Life Other Than My Relationship 64: I Got Dumped and No Longer Have a Relationship Harlan’s Tip Sheet

Chapter 9 Sex: Having It, Not Having It, Hearing Other People Having It

65: Deciding to Do It 66: Deciding Not to Do It 67: Doing It Way Too Much 68: The One-Night Stand 69: Pimps, Hos, and Reputations 70: Sexual Souvenirs 71: The U of Birth Control 72: Possibly Pregnant Harlan’s Tip Sheet

Chapter 10 Drinking on Campus: Tapping the Keg of Truth

73: Drinking on Campus 74: Slow Down, Don’t Drink Too Fast 75: Not Everyone Is Drinking 76: The Social Lubricant 77: Safer Unsafe Sex and Alcohol 78: Sexual Assault and Alcohol 79: Don’t Be So Stupid That You Accidentally Kill Yourself 80: Drinking and Driving 81: Still Hungover… 82: You Might Be an Alcoholic If… Harlan’s Tip Sheet

Chapter 11 Drugs on Campus: The Smoking, Snorting, and Pill-Popping Truth

83: About Drugs on Campus 84: How to Avoid Them 85: Why Not to Do Drugs 86: Just Don’t Accidentally Die 87: College Smoking Butts Harlan’s Tip Sheet

88: Loans, Grants, Scholarships, and Loose Change 89: Your Financial Aid Advisor: Money, Money, Money, Monnnnneeey 90: Part-Time Jobs, Big-Time Benefits 91: The Credit Card and the $600 Candy Bar 92: Bad Checks, Bad Credit, and Bad Ideas… 93: Checking Out the College Checking Account 94: Sorry, This Book Is Now “Used” 95: Cheap Strategies for Eating (or barely eating) 96: Laundry Tips: This Page Is Not Fabric Softener Harlan’s Tip Sheet

Chapter 13 Things Not Mentioned in the College Brochure: What They Don’t Tell You

97: The Freshman 15…Or, Um, 45 98: The Student Body Image 99: Exposing the College Eating Disorder 100: Depression and Other Major Mental Health Issues 101: Sexual Assault 102: To Transfer or Not to Transfer 103: Safe, Schmafe 104: Commuting? Words to Take with You 104.1: Community College: A Smart and Less Expensive Road 105: Diversity: Sexual, Religious, Racial—It’s All Good Harlan’s Tip Sheet

Chapter 14 College: A Higher Education: It’s Almost Time to Say Good-bye

106: The U of No Regrets 107: Your Tip Goes Here

The Naked Rear End About the Naked Author Back Cover