You Do You by Knight, Sarah -- Read -- Imperial Library of Trantor

Index

Cover Title Page Copyright Table of Contents Epigraph I’m Sure You’re Wondering Why I Called This Meeting I. YOU ARE HERE: An orientation exercise

Feat. The Tyranny of “Just Because” Just who do you think you are?

Ready player one Lowest Common Denominator Living A few caveats

WNDs and the second half of the Golden Rule The social contract The social contract—with amendments

Helpful guidelines for not being a psychopath Before you sign on the dotted line

Meet Judgy McJudgerson

A taxonomy of Judgys

Mental redecorating

Turning your weaknesses into strengths

Unconventional wisdom for unconventional people Leaning in to being you

II. DOs & DON’Ts: Rules for the breaking

DON’T BE SELFISH (Life is short. Reclaim the word.) You can’t please everyone, so you’ve got to please yourself

SPF Happy

Everybody dies “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”

Good selfish, bad selfish 7 ways you being selfish can benefit others

Attract your opposite Break new ground Your absence is their present

Selflessness: the mother of all myths

I learned it by watching Vanilla Ice Third time’s the charm DO YOUR BEST (Except when you can’t. Or you don’t want to. Or it’s giving you heartburn.)

5 reasons why it’s bad to be perfect

What would Marty McFly do?

Slack off every once in a while, or someday, you will ruin Christmas Perfection is in the eye of the beholder Damn, it feels good to be a gangster Stop and smell your new business cards Dial back on the “git ’er done”

Okay, but how do I relax???

Lower the bar Look around you Be the first to fuck shit up Talk to literally any old person

DON’T BE DIFFICULT (Ask for what you want, push back on what you don’t, and beware the focus group.) Being difficult: the spectrum

Just the tip

How to be “difficult”

You don’t get what you don’t ask for (Feat. Help around the apartment, good seats at the movies, better orgasms) I’ll be in my office What a bargain! (Feat. Ask the questions you’re not supposed to ask) 10 awesome things negotiating can get you

Death by focus group A taste test

Use your powers for good, not evil

God, why do you have to be so difficult? DO BE A TEAM PLAYER (On the contrary, you can do YOU all by yourself.) One is the loveliest number

God bless theater people 6 benefits of being alone

There’s no “o” in “team,” either. What’s your point? DON’T QUIT YOUR DAY JOB (Take risks, ignore the doubters, and prove the haters wrong.) Risky business

5 types of risks you could take and how to approach them (Feat. Saying “I love you,” starting a side hustle) Top 3 ways to silence the haters

Fly under the radar Screen your calls Clap back

I wish I knew how to quit you

Actually, sometimes when people quit, we all win

Midnight in the garden of obligation, guilt, and fear

III. WILLs & WON’Ts: Not-so-great expectations

YOU WILL CHANGE YOUR MIND (About unconventional lifestyle choices that inexplicably bother people who don’t have to live them? Probably not.) The elefante in my uterus How to convert the conventional conversation

Feat. Lifestyle choices and responses to “You’ll change your mind”

What if it’s not a choice? YOU WON’T GET ANYWHERE WITH THAT ATTITUDE (There are plenty of perks to being a pessimist.) The three little Ps

Productivity

Identify the threat Neutralize the enemy Go in guns blazing

Planning

Umbrella-ella-ella A “rain plan” isn’t just for rain

Punctuality

The early bird gets out in time for lunch Expect delays Time to crack the whip

“P” for “Play it close to the vest” YOU WILL REGRET THAT (Says who?) But it feels so right

You should try it!

One wrong doesn’t make a regret

This one time, at band camp You’ve got to make your own mistakes, and own the mistakes you make

YOU WON’T GET A GOOD JOB IF YOU DON’T GO TO COLLEGE (How to succeed at success without really caring what anyone else thinks.) Success is not one-size-fits-all

Other things you might succeed at You get a gold star

Good hair, don’t care YOU WILL NEVER LIVE THAT DOWN (Yes you will. Go ahead and let your freak flag fly.) Wacky with a chance of goofballs Making it weird

Freak flag: flying high

5 signs you might already be weird

Freak flag: half-mast

Feat. Mental redecorating

Freak flag: low and tight

Pretend you’re a toddler Pretend you’re a celebrity Pretend you’re alone

IV. SHOULDs & SHOULDN’Ts: Much too much obliged

YOU SHOULD ALWAYS PUT FAMILY FIRST (First runner-up is okay too.) Bye, bye, black sheep Reclaiming your time

There can be only one. It doesn’t have to be your cousin Jennifer. Altar-nate plans 5 ways to talk to your family about choosing other people over them

I choo-choo-choose you YOU SHOULDN’T ACT SO CRAZY (I kept a litter box under my desk for a year and I turned out okay.) Leave your biofeedback at the tone

I’m not a doctor, I don’t even play one on TV, please don’t sue me.

Life’s a beach YOU SHOULD SMILE MORE (How to break free from the Cult of Nice.)

Reasons I might not be smiling on any given day

The Cult of Nice

Do as I do, not as I look when I’m walking down the street minding my own goddamn business

There’s too much traffic on the high road

Feat. How to get NOT VERY NICE

YOU SHOULDN’T EAT THAT (I’ll take extra cheese, please.) It’s all in your head, not in your hips

Feat. Fêng shui with a side of “fuck that shit”

YOU SHOULD CHECK YOUR EGO AT THE DOOR (Check to make sure it’s fully inflated, that is.) High fives all around

Feat. [NAME REDACTED]

Leggo my ego That thorough stroking I promised

5 more reasons to feel good about yourself

Epilogue Discover More by Sarah Knight Acknowledgments About the Author Also Available

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