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Index
Cover Title Page Copyright Notice Dedication Acknowledgments Preface to the New Edition Introduction: Why Learn the Art of Mingling? 1. Overcoming Minglephobia
—A Word About World Wide Web-Headedness —How to Fake It Till You Make It —Four Survival Fantasies for the Truly Terrified
* The Naked Room * The Invisible Man * The Buddy System * Celebrity Magic
—Choosing Your First Clique
* Practice Your Mingle on a Wallflower * Judging a Book by Its Cover * Body Language Check * The Safety of Numbers
2. Open Sesame: Making a Successful Entrance
—Get Ready, Get Set …
* To Shake or Not to Shake * About Your Smile * The Philosophy of Fibbing: Why Some Lies are Essential
—The Four Basic Entrance Maneuvers
* The Honest Approach * The Fade-In * The Flattery Entrée * The Sophistication Test
—Opening Lines for Every Mood
* Level One: Risk-free * Level Two: Playful * Level Three: Daring
3. Now What? Tools and Rules for Continuing the Conversation
—Recovering from a Flubbed Opening —Career Talk: Yes or No? —Ten Tried-and-True Tricks of the Trade
* A Mnemonic for Those at a Loss for Words * The Interview * Playing a Game * Room with a View * Using Clichés * About Eye Contact * The Dot-Dot-Dot Plot * The Echo Chamber * The Funny Thing About Humor * How to Handle the Joker in Every Deck
—To Bemoan or Not to Bemoan —The Secret of Listening
* Understanding the Problem * Hearing Aides
4. The Great Escape: Bailing Out and Moving On
—When to Move
* Boredom and Other Discomforts * Wrong Fit * Saving Face * The Case of the Vanishing Group * Time’s Up!
—The Etiquette of Escape
* Knowing Where You’re Headed * The Five Laws of Survival
—The Getaway: Twelve Exit Maneuvers
* The Buffet Bye-Bye and Other Handy Excuses * Celling Out * The Honest Approach in Reverse * The Fade-Out * The Changing of the Guard * The Smooth Escape * Shake and Break * The Human Sacrifice * The Personal Manager * Escape by Mutual Consent * The Counterfeit Search * The Preemptive Strike: Dodge Ball
—Emergency Escape Hatches
5. Fancy Footwork: Advanced Mingling Techniques
—Mingling Styles for the Well-Schooled
* The Quick-Change Artist * The Pole Vaulter * The Playful Plagiarist * Trivial Pursuits * The Art of Piggybacking * The Butterfly Flit
—Gimmicks for the Confident Mingler
* A Case of Mistaken Identity * The Interruption Eruption * The Quotation Device * Party Favors: The Helpless Guest Gambit * Making the Most of Toasts
—Sophisticated Body Business
* The Mysterious Mingle * The Touchy-Feely Mingle * Fumbling-In * The Swivel
—Conversation Pieces: Using Props
* Jewelry and Accessories * The Dumb Use of Smartphones * The Hors d’Oeuvres Maneuver * Working the Bar or Food Area
—Playing Doubles: Team Mingling
* Preparty Strategy Sessions * Conversational Procurement * Intraparty Playdates * Shepherding * Reconnaissance and Rescue * The Mating Call
6. The Tailor-Made Mingle: Instructions for Specific Circumstances
—Navigating Current Events
* The Zeitgeist Heist * Pleading Guilty * Proving Your Mettle * High Voltage Area! Talking Politics
—Ahoy Polloi: Mingling in Public Places
* Mingling Outdoors or in a Crowd * That’s My Queue: Lines in Line * Elevator Mingling
—The Business of Mingling for Business
* Name-Tag Tips * Business Card Advice
—Mingling for Love
* Nonparty Love Venues * Romance Copilots
—Hosting: How to Please Your Guests Every Time
* Host Phobia * The Party Coach * The Feng Shui of Hosting
7. Handling Difficult Situations
—Lie or Die —Dealing with Faux Pas
* When You’re Dressed Wrong * Introductions: A Recurring Nightmare * The Anecdotal Antidote: Storytelling as a Healing Technique * All-Purpose Faux Pas Recovery Lines * The Faux Pas-Moi: The Art of Denial * The Faux Pas-cifist
—Negotiating Tough Rooms
* The Sardine Can * The Thin Room * Mingling with Drunks * Mingling with the Truly Arrogant * How to Crash a Party Without Breaking Anything
—The Sit-Down Mingle —Quick Fixes for Dire Circumstances
* How to React to Unwelcome Physicalities * Handling Insults * Cutting Your Losses (or, When to Just Give Up and Go Home)
8. The After-Party: Instructions for Following Up
—How to Follow Up
* Email or Text * Facebook * LinkedIn * Twitter * Follow-Up Lines * Phonethics: When to Use Your Voice * The Power and Glory of the Handwritten Note
—Great Expectations
9. From Insecurity to Enlightenment: The Tao of Mingling
* Wu Wei: Premingle Meditation * The Yin/Yang of Circulating * The Art of Yielding: Using the Principles of Tai Chi * How to Feel Happy When You Are Left Alone
Index About the Author Also by Jeanne Martinet Newsletter Sign-up Contents Copyright
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