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Index
Title Page
Copyright Page
Contents
Foreword: Turtlefucking Mothers by Penn Jillette
Acknowledgments
But First: A Rock Group Inside of Enemy Territory
1. Howard Kaylan, with a Y
2. Music Juice and the Sounds of Pounds
3. Westward, Toward the Matterhorn!
4. Destiny Calls
5. The West Coast Ambassadors of Good-Time Music
6. How Is the Weather?
7. Beat the Beatles
8. We Rule This World! No One Can Touch Us!
9. Eht Seltrut
10. Punks Leaving a Trail of Destruction
11. Lucifer Laughs
12. Fuckin’ Corporate Sellouts!
13. Put a Fork in Us
14. Around Here, We Have Rules
15. A Hint of Possible Ascension on the Hipness Scale
16. As Good as It Gets
17. A Car Shaped Like an Enormous Penis, Sounds Like Good, Clean Family Fun
18. Anybody Got Any Dope?
19. A Closely Guarded Secret
20. A Pony Harness Dipped in Enchilada Sauce
21. Smoke on the Water
22. Air Supply Is a Better Name Than the Phlorescent Leech and Eddie!
23. Perception Is Everything
24. Spinning in Some Hippie Delirium
25. Officially Bipolar
26. Lobster, Caviar, and Cocaine
27. Skating on Thin Ice
28. Moving Targets
29. Getting Spit On by the Boss Himself!
30. Singers Don’t Get Desks
31. Hey Ma, Look—I’m a Performance Artist!
32. Who the Hell Are These Fat Guys, and Why Are They Here?
33. Turtles Once Again
34. Happy Together
Photo Insert
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