CONTENTS

ALL THEY WANT IS MY MONEY MY PUSSY MY BLOOD

The President Has Never Said the Word Black

Hottentot Venus

Another Another Autumn in New York

Poem on Beyoncé’s Birthday

Lush Life

Beyoncé on the Line for Gaga

We Don’t Know When We Were Opened (Or, The Origin of the Universe)

My Vinyl Weighs a Ton

Beyoncé Is Sorry for What She Won’t Feel

Afro

These Are Dangerous Times, Man

Rebirth of Slick

RoboBeyoncé

Delicate and Jumpy

Freaky Friday Starring Beyoncé and Lady Gaga

13 Ways of Looking at a Black Girl

The Book of Negroes

The Gospel According to Her

Black Woman with Chicken

The Gospel of Jesus’s Wife

White Beyoncé

The President’s Wife

Welcome to the Jungle

Beyoncé, Touring in Asia, Breaks Down in a White Tee

What Beyoncé Won’t Say on a Shrink’s Couch

Ain’t Misbehavin’

Untitled While Listening to Drake

Beyoncé in Third Person

Heaven Be a Xanax

Beyoncé Celebrates Black History Month

Earth, Wind & Fire Reunion Tour 2013

It’s Getting Hot in Here So Take Off All Your Clothes

Take a Walk on the Wild Side

The Book of Revelation

99 Problems

Slouching Toward Beyoncé

Let Me Handle My Business, Damn

Beyoncé Prepares a Will

Please Wait (Or, There Are More Beautiful Things Than Beyoncé)

Funeral for the Black Dog

So What

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