Max Roberts Publishing
Death Nell copyright © 2013 by Mary Grace Murphy.
Cover art design by Eddie Vincent, © 2013 by Max Roberts Publishing.
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SMASHWORDS EDITION
This book is ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
This book is dedicated to all foodies everywhere. Whether you’ve made a career in food or just enjoy the pleasures of the feast—this one’s for you!
Thanks to my community of writers, Al, Denise, Lily, and Louise for your feedback and guidance as I worked on this novel.
And to Brittiany Koren, editor at Written Dreams for her encouragement and motivation.
Without all of you, this book would not have been written.
Nell scowled as she stood in the doorway of her home office looking at her laptop. She rubbed the back of her neck as she considered whether or not she wanted to be abused this early in the morning. She didn’t, but sat down anyway with defiance and opened up her food blog.
Nell’s Noshes Up North
David’s Kitchen
What kind of a whackjob are you? Sam’s Slam has the best burgers in Northeast Wisconsin and you order a side salad? Then dare to write a negative review? I say Sam’s Slam is a “True Nosh.”
Monica 410
Nell, I’m going to have to disagree with your review of Sam’s Slam. Our whole family has gone there on many occasions and been delighted with the food. Your review has made me go back and look at some of the other places you thought were “Truly Nauseous.” You sure got this one wrong.
Cream and Sugar Baby
True Nosh. Hate to disagree with you, but I’ve never had a bad meal there and the people are always friendly. I’ll still read your blog, Nell, because you’re usually right.
Nell slammed down the lid of her laptop. Counting these three comments, there were thirty-two responses on her blog since she posted three days ago and they all disagreed with her. She hardly knew she had that many followers.
She stomped out of her office and went right to her favorite room in the house—her newly redecorated kitchen. Opening the door of her beautiful French door refrigerator, she poked around and finally spied the treasure she was searching for. The sole survivor of last night’s food rampage. The last piece of the luscious pecan turtle cheesecake she made two days ago. It sat taunting her on the shelf. Not for long.
Nell put the cheesecake on a plate and devoured it greedily at the kitchen table as she thought about how she found herself in this disastrous situation.
When she had first come up with the idea of a food blog, it seemed the natural thing to do. She knew a lot about food and liked to eat with a zealousness that was equaled by few. What more could there be to it?
First she had to get set up with a blog on her computer. Nell loved the idea, but was minimally knowledgeable about computers. Having just taken early retirement from teaching, her experience didn’t go much beyond emails to parents and posting student scores in the grade book program. Having a website and blog were new to her. But, she was quickly learning as she went along.
Second, Nell had noticed the pinch in her pocketbook. Even though she was enjoying all of the meals out, the cost had put her monthly food budget into the red. She had traveled as far south as Green Bay and as far north as Eagle River to sample the dishes at various establishments. She even planned to go to Superior. But the expense of the gas and wear and tear on her car were adding up.
But the third problem, and perhaps most distressing of all, is how all the meals out had also put a pinch in her clothes. Outfits that used to be comfortable were now tight, and any new clothes purchased had to be in a larger size.
“Sorry, boys. You weren’t fast enough this time. Dessert is all gone,” Nell chuckled as she looked down at her two dogs that had joined her in the kitchen. “How about a treat?”
George, the Schnauzer quietly waited at attention, but Newman, the Maltese voiced a frantic little woof. Nell gave them the treats and a few pats on the head. How the two boys made her think of Drew, her late husband. She and Drew picked George out from a local family, when he was just old enough to separate from his mother. A couple years later, they bought Newman from a kennel which turned out to be practically a puppy mill. The Maltese had a host of problems, but Drew worked with him patiently. He had played outside with them regularly—something she rarely did. Just one more guilt trip on which she was a passenger. George and Newman needed more exercise and so did she. She promised herself she would take them on a long walk after she figured out what to do about her blog.
What irritated her the most right now was that her followers were right and she was wrong in her review. She gave Sam’s Slam, Home of the Grand Slamburger a horrible write-up. The problem was that she hadn’t even eaten a burger. She had ordered a side salad and the vegetable of the day. To be fair to the establishment, she should just go back, order the kind of food that the place specialized in, and, if she was impressed, write another review. It would be as simple as that, right?
Wrong!
If she was honest with herself, her weight issue was more severe than snug clothing due to the extra meals out. It had yo-yoed most of her life, though several years ago she had worked hard at living a healthy lifestyle and lost close to seventy pounds. She still had about thirty more to go to meet the chart in her doctor’s office, but she was healthier.
Until six months ago.
Since starting the blog, her weight had inched back up. The day she had gone to Sam’s Slam she had gained two more pounds, culminating in an additional ten pound gain during that time. If she kept gaining at this rate, in another six months she would be fifty pounds overweight. Nell absently tucked her thumb under the elastic waistband of her khakis and pulled it out for a little relief from the tightness. I wonder how much longer I’ll be able to wear these pants?
Not too smart of her to write a restaurant review blog when there were so many dishes she had no business eating. If only she could come up with a way to continue her blog and keep the weight off.
Bending over to rub the dogs’ bellies and once again silently promising to take them for a walk later, she went back in by her desk and opened her laptop. Nell looked at the Sam’s Slam review again. Maybe it wasn’t so bad.
Nell’s Noshes Up North
Sam’s Slam - Marinette, WI
Sam’s Slam is one of those cheesy little bar and grills that we see dotted here and there in every area of small town Wisconsin. You walk in and the first thing you come upon is the bar. You grab yourself a stool, order up a beer or cocktail, and contemplate your meal.
When I visited, the place was packed, so I sat at the bar, ordered a Diet Sprite and looked at the menu. I recoiled in horror. Beef, and in gigantic quantities. The ounces offered for one person could feed a family in the third world for a month. It was also Fish Fry Friday. All kinds of deep fried, batter fried, and pan fried fish were available. This definitely was not healthy. I could feel my arteries hardening as I read the listing of entrees. I searched for something to order. I ended up with a small salad with dressing on the side and the vegetable of the day.
Soon I was whisked away to the dining area, which I could see had recently been expanded. The decorating job was a dreadful mix of Packers’ memorabilia and hunting paraphernalia. Aaron Rodgers to my left and a deer head to my right. Must I continue?
As I waited, I saw the wait staff carrying huge trays loaded with food. The smell of the sizzling steaks and deep fried entrees was overwhelming and made me feel queasy. I can only imagine how it tasted. My salad came—iceberg lettuce, a couple slices of pale tomato, and a few cucumber rounds. What was the veggie of the day? Canned peas and carrots—what a surprise!
Do I even need to tell you that I won’t be having another round at Sam’s Slam? Here’s a slam, Sam. You won’t see me again!
You have been warned! Go to Sam’s Slam at your own peril. If you are that foolhardy, please write about it here.
A true nosh or truly nauseous?— You Decide!
After rereading the review, Nell found her way to the freezer. She realized now how unfair she had been in the review. She needed the comfort of cold chocolate fudge swirl ice cream to help her decide when she could go back and face Sam’s Slam. Diet be damned!