CLOTHES ENCOUNTERS

Ensembles for the Entire Wedding Party

Wedding clothes are inherently magical. They have the power to transform—witness the entire genre of TV shows devoted to a woman trying on wedding gowns, waiting for the moment when she slips into the right one and suddenly becomes a bride. It’s not just the bride’s gown (and veil and shoes and jewelry) that is weighted with cultural meaning. Beliefs and rituals are associated with what the groom and attendants wear, too. Not to mention the accessories the main players carry with them. Read on for ways to dress yourself—and everyone else—in good fortune.

COLOR OUTSIDE THE LINES

In the days before bridal boutiques, women were simply married in their best dress, which they could wear again and again throughout their marriage. Here’s a rhyme from a nineteenth-century Old Farmer’s Almanac about what the color of the bride’s dress foretold:

Married in White, you have chosen right.

Married in Grey, you will go far away.

Married in Black, you will wish yourself back.

Married in Red, you will wish yourself dead.

Married in Green, ashamed to be seen.

Married in Blue, you will always be true.

Married in Pearl, you will live in a whirl.

Married in Yellow, ashamed of your fellow.

Married in Brown, you will live in the town.

Married in Pink, your spirit will sink.

Take these predictions with a grain of salt, or use them as inspiration to make up your own rhyme to justify the dress you have your heart set on—“Married in Blush, with happiness you’ll be flush.”

Keep in mind that certain colors do carry symbolic weight in various cultures. Read the following list to defend your choices to Aunt Sadie who is shocked that you don’t plan to marry in white, or to your bridesmaids who wonder why you’ve chosen a shade that may not be their best look. And for color advice that extends beyond fashion to décor, see this page.

WHITE It wasn’t until Queen Victoria wed in white in 1840 (to match the lace she’d chosen for her gown), that alabaster wedding dresses became a trend. White gowns were a status symbol at first, as only the wealthy could afford a best dress in such an impractical color. But the shade quickly came to symbolize purity, becoming the de facto hue for brides. Victoria wasn’t the first to wear white, though. In ancient Rome, brides were clad in white as a symbol of their joy. In Japan, as in much of Asia, white is the color of mourning, but a Shinto bride wears white for the ceremony, then changes to a silk kimono that incorporates both white and red, symbolizing the death of her old life and the beginning of her married life. Death and new life are also ever-present in the white wedding blanket of the Hopi bride, which the groom and his family make for her, and which she wears at her wedding, dons once a year for the annual Kachina Festival, and is wrapped in when she dies (when it becomes a cloud that transports her to the underworld). Each of the blanket’s four corners has colorful tassels woven with fertility symbols.

BLUE After white, blue is the color most linked to weddings, as it has long symbolized fidelity. (Just think of the “something blue” rhyme—see this page.) In biblical times, Jewish brides had blue ribbons sewn onto their wedding dresses to show loyalty and modesty. It’s also a lucky color for Christian brides because it’s associated with the Virgin Mary, who is often shown in ecclesiastical art wearing the shade both because it recalls heaven and because blue paint, once made of lapis lazuli, was the most precious pigment.

BLACK In previous centuries, some Spanish brides wore black to show that they’d be devoted to their spouses until they died. (Morbid or romantic? Or a little of both?) In the United States, where traditionally black has been reserved for funerals, it was once considered rude to wear black to a wedding, as if the event had thrown you into mourning. But today, the color is associated with formality and sophistication (as in black-tie), and is now a popular option for bridesmaids’ dresses and even bridal gowns.

BROWN Perhaps the most traditional versions of brown wedding attire come from Fiji and Samoa, where the couple’s clothes are made of tapa, cloth crafted from mulberry tree bark (which veers toward beige), and decorated with black, brown, and white patterns that have regional significance. The designs were originally made with soil and clay, and the cloth is thought to be a fertility symbol, as it comes from the bark of a flowering tree (see this page).

GREEN Korean brides traditionally wear a celadon wonsam, as green is a calming color in feng shui (see this page). Many Asian brides choose jade jewelry, which is considered very lucky, especially if it is a gift from a friend or relative who has worn the item herself and wishes to share her happiness. But Irish brides avoid green because it’s the fairies’ favorite color, and it’s believed that if fairies happen upon a wedding, they’ll lure the bride away. On the other hand, for the same reason, it’s good luck for bridesmaids to wear green—to distract the mischievous sprites.

METALLIC While the number, color, and pattern of the outfits worn by Khmer couples in Cambodia varies, the most elaborate ensembles are gold silk to demonstrate that the bride and groom are equal to royalty on their wedding day. And in many places, the bride is covered in gold jewelry, as in Djibouti, where an Afar bride may shield her face in intricate gold chains that hang from her headpiece like a veil and attach to her nose ring, indicating the importance of the occasion.

PINK Fuchsia in Hindi is called rani, or “queen,” because Indian queens historically wore the shade.

PURPLE Purple clothing is a symbol of power, passion, and prosperity, associated with royalty in ancient Rome, much of western Europe, and parts of Africa (maroon is one of the colors of ceremonial aso-oke cloth worn at weddings and by Yoruba chiefs). But it indicates mourning in the Catholic Church, where priests wear purple to say mass for the dead.

RED Many Indian brides wear red saris, as the color, associated with the rising sun, represents love, purity, fertility, the goddess Durga, and goddess worship in general. The bridal dress described in the Hindu sacred text The Ramayana is a gossamer red fabric embroidered with gold. Chinese brides also favor red, as it’s the color of luck and wealth and is believed to drive away evil spirits. (A Chinese bride will often change clothes at least twice during her wedding, perhaps from a white, Western-style gown to a red qipao for the tea ceremony to a party dress for the reception.) Yemeni brides wear red onyx necklaces to repel the evil eye (see this page).

YELLOW Brides wear yellow in parts of northern India, where it represents prosperity, perhaps because it’s associated with good wheat and mustard harvests or because the color traditionally came from expensive saffron dye and was reserved for the wealthy or ceremonial occasions.

MULTIPLE COLORS In Elizabethan times, bridesmaids would tie colored ribbons into love knots that symbolized the bond between the couple and sew them onto the bride’s dress. Each color represented a different virtue (blue for fidelity, for example). At the end of the party, the groomsmen and guests were invited to untie the bride’s knots, which was said to pave the way for a pain-free childbirth down the road.

Korean brides who don’t wear pale green choose floral robes with trailing sleeves embroidered in blue (for the earth), yellow (for mankind), and red (for heaven). The traditional Navajo bridal outfit is made up of four colors that honor the directions of the compass: black for the north, white for the east, blue for the south, and yellow for the west. In Swaziland, the beaded bridal apron is red for fertility, white for purity, and black for wealth.

The kente cloths that make up wedding attire for both bride and groom in Ghana contain colored stripes, including yellow for fertility, pink for feminine power, blue to evoke the heavens, and silver to represent the moon, the ultimate expression of female strength and beauty. Couples often wear matching kente cloths as a visual representation of their unity.

CROWNING GLORIES

Juliet caps had their moment (the 1970s), birdcage veils skew vintagey cool, tiaras are beloved by princess brides, and floral accessories will always pack boho appeal. But what tops a bride’s wedding ensemble—and sometimes a groom’s, too—isn’t just trendy; it’s also associated with luck in many cultures.

Veils

Brides have been wearing veils since antiquity. There are three auspicious reasons for the custom: First, to confuse or scare off evil spirits eager to harm the beautiful bride. Second, to make it harder for runaway brides to escape (some theorize that the veil represents the blanket a groom-abductor would throw over her head back when men kidnapped their brides). And third, to symbolize that the groom’s love is beyond skin-deep—that he would marry her even if he could not see her radiant face.

Over her white gown, an ancient Roman bride was covered in a long, yellow-orange-red veil meant to deter evil spirits by tricking them into thinking she was on fire. Chinese brides wear red veils en route to their ceremonies, and some Turkish and Eastern European brides also wear red veils to block the evil eye (see this page and this page), as the lucky color symbolizes blood and, therefore, life. If your veil or gown is trimmed in tassels, those are evil eye repellers, too (which is also why they’re found on priestly garb and military uniforms in much of the Middle East).

A cross-cultural superstition posits it’s lucky for a happily married woman to place the veil on the bride’s head so her good fortune will rub off. Another widely held belief says that borrowing the veil of a happily married woman is auspicious, as you’re borrowing some of her luck as well. In Armenian weddings, the maid of honor waves the veil above the bride’s head three times for health, happiness, and prosperity, before passing it over the bridesmaids’ heads to share the bride’s luck in love.

A Latvian bride will wear her veil until midnight, then pass it on to whichever relative is likely to marry next, and put on a “marriage cap” that signifies she’s now a wife, in a ritual called mic̆ošana, or “the changing of the headdress.” (The groom may represent his transition into a husband by putting on a Panama hat.) A similar ritual, the oczepiny, or “unveiling and capping ceremony,” traditionally took place in Poland, where the removal of the veil and unbraiding of the bride’s hair occurred at midnight, so that as one day transitioned into the next, she passed from girlhood into marriage. Her grandmother gave her the marriage cap, which she refused three times, reluctant to leave behind her youth, before accepting it. Today, the bride still removes her cap, but tosses it, bouquet-style. The groom does the same with his tie, and the singletons who catch each are said to be next to marry.

According to American custom, if a bride’s veil is torn, it’s good luck. If you’re wearing a long veil, weighing down the edges by sewing coins into the hem helps to attract wealth and avoid wardrobe malfunctions.

Headpieces

Whether they’re simple floral wreaths or ornate gold coronets, wedding crowns symbolize—as the Archbishop of Canterbury said at the marriage of Prince Charles and Lady Diana—that on their wedding day every couple is the king and queen of love.

In Orthodox Christian weddings, crowns, or stefana in Greek, are part of the religious service. The crowns, which can be made of flowers or precious metals and are tied to each other by a length of ribbon, are crossed above the bride and groom before being placed on their heads. A similar ritual occurs in a Thai ceremony, in which the couple’s parents crown them with white fabric wreaths called mongkol, or “circles of luck,” linked by a thread, before holy water is poured over their hands (see this page).

Other cultures have crowns as part of their stylistic, if not religious, traditions. In Sweden, Norway, and Denmark, brides wear brudkronan, flared metal crowns that look like they came out of a fairy tale, as a symbol of virginity. In Finland, the crown, called a kruunumorsian, is gold and plays a starring role in a divination game to see which bridesmaid will marry next (see this page).

In China, the bride wears a headband called a fengguan, or the “phoenix crown,” as the proud bird is a bridal symbol (see this page), and before he leaves for the ceremony, the groom takes part in the jia guan, or “capping ritual,” in which his father places a hat adorned with cypress leaves on his head to show he is taking on the responsibility of a family. In many African countries, including Nigeria, a groom wears a fila, a cloth hat that stands up in crownlike fashion. Some Hindu and Muslim grooms wear turbans, a symbol of royalty and luck, and in northern India and parts of Bangladesh and Pakistan, a Hindu groom gets a veil of sorts, called a sehara: garlands of small flowers or beads are attached to his turban to shield his face and make him resemble the god Vishnu on his wedding day.

There are also veil and crown alternatives. A Shinto bride in Japan wears a tsunokakushi, a white silk headdress whose name means “horn hider,” as it’s said to conceal any metaphorical horns associated with jealousy or ego, and to help her become a good wife. A more bride-friendly theory holds that the horns hidden aren’t the bride’s, but those of jealous demons. In Nigeria, Yoruba brides top their ensembles with Gele headwraps, while Igbo brides wear auspicious red coral beads (symbols of joy and life) strung as headbands, caps, or crowns.

HAIR AND MAKEUP

In Europe during the Middle Ages, a bride wore her hair loose or braided to signal her status as a virgin. Even after that, Irish brides chose braids plaited with lace or ribbons, as symbols of femininity. A Yemeni bride wears thick braids to show fertility—if her hair isn’t long enough, she’ll add faux braids, sometimes made of wool, under an ornate headdress.

Today, many African brides have elaborately plaited hairstyles, and in some regions, the braids are covered in clay; the reddish color is thought to promote love. (Among the Masai, the groom rubs clay into his hair, too.) In China, the bride takes part in a shang tou hairdressing ritual in which a lucky woman—one whose parents, husband, and children are all living—helps coil the bride’s hair into a bun while repeating blessings.

The night before the wedding is when lucky hairdressing rituals take place in Vietnam. The bride’s mother brushes her daughter’s hair using three combs, making a different wish for her with each one. Cambodian Khmer couples participate in a gaat sah hair-cutting ceremony just before the reception, when two singers dance around them, pretending to cut their hair to rid them of any baggage from their past.

Bridal makeup isn’t as rich with symbolism as hair, but some cultures embrace auspicious face paint. To ward off evil spirits, a traditional Korean bride would wear yonji konji, three red circles of makeup (or paper), on her forehead and each cheek. Indian brides still wear kajal, kohl eyeliner, to ward off bad luck (and, as a bonus, define their eyes). And there’s a Hindu ritual that brings hair and makeup together—the groom placing sindoor, vermilion powder, on the part of his bride’s hair, a sign that she is a married woman. Traditionally, women applied sindoor to their parts daily until they were widowed, when it was wiped off as part of the mourning ritual.

IT’S ALL IN THE DETAILS

For both brides and grooms, wedding day accessories are an easy way to invite good fortune and ward off bad fortune.

Shoes

After the veil, shoes are the next best supporting accessory in a bride’s wedding ensemble. Many modern bridal shoe designers incorporate blue in the design or sole of the shoe as a lucky “something” (see this page), but there are auspicious customs you can adopt whatever shoes you’re wearing. In Poland, traditionally, the bride’s shoes have to be closed-toe so that good luck doesn’t escape through an open front, while in Scandinavia, the bride may wear a silver coin from her dad in her left shoe and a gold one from her mom in her right, as a way of making sure she’ll always have enough money in her married life. Among the Zuni Native Americans, it was once the groom’s job to craft his bride-to-be’s leather wedding boots as proof he could care for her.

In much of Eastern Europe and parts of Russia, the groom will drink a toast “out of the shoe” of the bride. (For the sake of hygiene, this usually involves wedging a champagne flute into the shoe.) During a Portuguese wedding reception, the bride may take off her shoes and place them on the dance floor. Guests wishing to dance with her put money inside to pay for the privilege, and the couple take that money to help fund their honeymoon. A Hindu groom’s shoes get a lot of attention when the bride’s family hides them in the traditional and hilarious joota chupai shoe-stealing ritual during the ceremony (see this page). Hasidic Jews also focus their good luck on the groom’s shoes: he’s meant to untie any shoelaces (and his tie, and any other knotted pieces of clothing) to ensure a problem-free marriage. Similarly, in Syria, grooms of yore avoided wearing any kind of knot; doing so was said to cause impotence.

Jewelry

The most obvious way to have jewelry bring you luck on your wedding day is to wear an heirloom piece from someone you love, or something that has been worn by multiple brides in happy marriages, like your sisters, cousins, or aunts. But there are plenty of jewelry rituals to follow.

Once a couple are wed in India, each one of them wears a silver toe ring on the second toe of both of their feet to show that they’re married. In some areas, the groom slips the ring on the bride’s foot during the Hindu ceremony, before placing a mangalsutra, or holy thread, necklace around her neck as a symbol of their union. Each mangalsutra contains black beads meant to repel the evil eye (see this page), and the groom may also hide a piece of iron in his pocket for the same purpose.

In Western cultures, superstition states that a bride should not wear pearls, as the ancient Greeks believed they were the tears of the gods, and wearing them would foretell a sad married life. But a competing superstition holds that pearls substitute for any tears the bride might have otherwise shed during her marriage, making them a good luck choice. And the ancient Greeks themselves felt that wearing pearls would prevent a bride from crying on her wedding day. In South Asia, a Hindu tale has Krishna picking a pearl from the ocean floor and giving it to his daughter, Pandaia, at her wedding. And the Koran describes pearls as one of the rewards awaiting the faithful in paradise.

Igbo brides wear coral bead necklaces, earrings, and/or crowns, as the red color symbolizes joy, life, and wealth, and the size and shape of the beads indicate the status of the wearer.

Among Native Americans, Hopi and Navajo brides wear squash blossom necklaces, which are traditional fertility symbols because of their resemblance to flowers—and, some say, to the end of a pomegranate—and because the beads leading up and down to the main pendant can be seen as the bride’s future children surrounding her.

On the west coast of Africa, cowrie shells, which are thought to boost fertility, feature heavily in bridal jewelry.

Everything Else

Other accessories aren’t necessarily must-haves, but they can be lucky nice-to-haves. Shawls are welcome at a winter wedding, especially if you’re marrying a Scottish groom, who may wrap his family’s clan tartan around your shoulders during the vow exchange for luck—and to match his kilt. Or you could choose a mirrored or sequined shawl inspired by the handira, Moroccan wedding blankets Berber brides wrap around themselves after the ceremony, which their female relatives make for them, attaching metallic discs that sparkle and jingle to scare away evil spirits.

Gloves aren’t necessarily worn by brides today, but in the Victorian era, a pair of them was the last thing the bride would put on, looking away from the mirror so that she wouldn’t see herself in her complete wedding attire before the ceremony. Traditionally, Greek brides would hide a sugar cube in one of the fingers of their gloves to ensure married life would be sweet.

Handkerchiefs are also now fairly rare in day-to-day life, but they often see a revival at weddings. The bride may carry a handkerchief embroidered with blue thread for luck, or wrap her bouquet in one that belonged to a beloved family member. A Belgian bride will hold a handkerchief embroidered with her first name, which she’ll later frame and hang on the wall in her home. When the next family wedding rolls around—be it her sister’s or her daughter’s—she takes down the frame, removes the handkerchief and has that bride-to-be’s name embroidered on it so that the heirloom is passed on, along with the luck and love it represents. On the Greek island of Corfu, brides used to wear tsoutsoumides, red handkerchiefs printed with peacock feathers; today they’re tied to the mirrors of the car transporting the bride, and are held by the bride and groom as they lead the wedding dance after the ceremony. An Irish bride may carry a handkerchief that she will eventually fashion into a christening bonnet for her first child—who will then turn it back into a “magic hankie” to carry on his or her wedding day.

When it comes to hankies, don’t forget your loved ones. In Switzerland, attendants offer arriving guests lucky colored handkerchiefs, and receive a coin in return; the money goes to help the newlyweds set up their home. Or follow the Hungarian custom of the bride giving her spouse-to-be an auspicious number of handkerchiefs (three or seven, which are prime numbers that, like the couple, can’t be divided).

Fans are seldom found rattling around in handbags these days, but they, too, live on at weddings. A Nigerian bride carries an abebe, or “hand fan,” as the finishing touch of her engagement and wedding outfits to help her keep cool under all the aso-oke fabric. And a Chinese bride traditionally brought a fan with her when she left home for the wedding, dropping it en route to the groom’s house to show she was leaving her old life behind.

Then there are the petticoat pockets where brides once hid objects. That might have been tiny scissors to cut the evil eye (see this page), or, in early-American custom, a pouch with a dollar and bits of bread, wood, and cloth, to ensure the pair would always have money, food, a home, and clothing. Today, a bride may have a good-luck coin sewn into the lining of her dress, or her wedding date embroidered there in blue thread.

Of course, in Western cultures, the most commonly thought-of accessories are the ones that fulfill the old English rhyme “Something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.” The something old is meant to indicate that the love the bride had before getting married will continue. The something new is to guarantee luck in her married life. Something borrowed is a reminder that her friends will always be there to help. (It’s also said that if your something borrowed is on loan from a single woman, she will get engaged within the year.) And the something blue is for everlasting devotion and fidelity (see this page).

There’s a last, lesser-known line to that ditty: “And a sixpence in her shoe,” in England, or “And a shiny penny in her shoe,” in America. That symbolism is fairly obvious: a lucky coin to make sure the couple will always have money. A four-leaf clover is a softer substitute, though some say walking on the coin is meant to cause discomfort on the day to spare the bride a rocky road in her marriage. Variations on this custom include having the father of the bride give her the coin to pass good fortune down through the generations, or the groom give it to her to bring them both luck. Some say it’s twice as auspicious if the coin has the bride’s birth year on it. A new coin with your wedding year seems pretty fortunate, too! A coin from the currency of your or your betrothed’s family’s “old country” has significance as you’ll be carrying part of your past into your future.