Notes

Prologue

1 Recreational Equipment Inc.

2 I love you my beautiful, Claire

5. More Fun than a Panzerkampfwagen

1 a medieval moron

8. Doing Donuts

1 CDG

2 16,404.2 feet

12. Halle-fucking-lujah

1 La Kamasutra (the highly illustrated French version complete with Blu-ray DVD, special instructional commentary in three languages, iPhone app, antinomically correct posable action figures, and a tube of Aspercream maximum strength muscle pain reliever.

15. Feathers in the Air

1 Russian shit.

17. Drama Queens

1 German whore

2 French slut

3 Stop it you, two children

4 Italian slut

18. Père Noël

1 basket

2 Santa Claus

3 Merry Christmas

21. Four Spring Love Songs

1 I love you Claire.

2 I love you too Wyatt.

3 Stopping at every viewpoint to snuggle

22. Dogs Playing Poker

1 National Security Agency

26. The True Elegance of Moi

1 You are so beautiful. Are you an angel?

2 Shit

3 phantom

4 mushrooms

27. Tickle, Tickle

1 You smell like a squid.

2 You smell like an octopus