Notes

Chapter 1: Why Is It So Complicated?

1. Phillip C. McGraw, PhD, Life Strategies (New York: Hyperion, 1999), 109.

2. Jen Abbas, Generation Ex: Adult Children of Divorce and the Healing of Our Pain (Colorado Springs: Waterbrook, 2004), 86.

3. www.DivorceCare.org, www.GriefShare.org, www.CelebrateRecovery.org

4. From a personal conversation with Heather Hetchler, founder, www.CafeSmom.com. Used with permission.

Chapter 2: When Your Hubby Is Stuck: Stepmom Frustration

1. Judith S. Wallerstein, Julia M. Lewis, and Sandra Blakeslee, The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce (New York: Hyperion, 2000), xxxiii.

Chapter 3: Will We Ever Get Along?—The Ex-Wife-in-Law

1. “The Second Wife: Baptized by Barf,” Stepmom Magazine, May 2013, www.stepmommagazine.com.

2. Reinhold Niebuhr, The Essential Reinhold Niebuhr, ed. Robert McAfee Brown (New Haven, CT: Yale University Press, 1986), 251.

3. Lara R. Badain, Esq., “How to Avoid Unnecessary Legal Headaches With Your Ex-Wife,” Stepmom Magazine, June 2013, 9, www.stepmommagazine.com.

Chapter 4: The Full-Time Stepmom—When Mom Is Missing

1. Dr. Archibald Hart, Helping Children Survive Divorce (Dallas: Word Publishing, 1996), 20.

2. Ibid., 92.

3. www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/1148687.Samuel_Chadwick

Chapter 7: “What Did You Say?” Educating Family and Friends

1. Paul Coughlin and Jennifer D. Degler, PhD, No More Christian Nice Girl (Bloomington, MN: Bethany House, 2010), 52.

2. Proverbs 27:17

Chapter 8: Holidays, Weddings, Mother’s Day—Oh My!

1. Ron Deal and Laura Petherbridge, The Smart Stepmom (Bloomington, MN: Bethany House, 2009), 206.

Chapter 9: Let’s Hear It From the Men—Hubby’s Perspective

1. Ron Deal and Laura Petherbridge, The Smart Stepmom (Bloomington, MN: Bethany House, 2009), 132.

2. Ibid., 106.

3. Heather Hetchler with Andy Hetchler, “Hard Times Loop: One Man’s Perspective on Stepfamily Life,” StepMom Magazine, June 2013, 17, www.stepmommagazine.com.

Chapter 10: Mirror, Mirror on the Wall—A Peek Inside

1. Henry Cloud and John Townsend, Boundaries in Marriage (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 1999), 32.

2. Pat Springle, Rapha’s Twelve-Step Program for Overcoming Codependency (Houston and Dallas: Rapha, 1990), 13. Quoted in Laura Petherbridge, When “I Do” Becomes “I Don’t” (Colorado Springs, CO: David C. Cook, 2008), 116.

3. Rick Warren, The Purpose-Driven Life (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2002), 153.

4. Phillip C. McGraw, PhD, Life Strategies (New York: Hyperion, 1999), 109.

5. Warren, The Purpose-Driven Life, 153.

6. List adapted from Laura Petherbridge, When “I Do” Becomes “I Don’t” (Colorado Springs, CO: David C. Cook, 2008), 117.

7. John P. Splinter, The Complete Divorce Recovery Handbook (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 1992), 83.

Chapter 11: Who’s Your Daddy? Satisfying Our Deepest Longing

1. John 14:6

2. NIV 1984

3. Isaiah 43:3–4 THE MESSAGE

4. Jeremiah 31:3 THE MESSAGE

5. CEV

6. Public domain, fourth stanza removed.