I'd Listen to My Parents if They'd Just Shut Up by Wolf, Anthony -- Read -- Imperial Library of Trantor

Index

Cover Title Page Dedication Contents Preface Introduction: The Parenting Revolution

The Baby Self and the Mature Self Who Witnesses the Baby Self Most Often? Which Self Is Your Child’s Real Self? “Never Give Up!”: The Baby Self’s Motto Adolescence: A Necessary Stage The Allergy All Teens Develop Remember Not to Take It Personally

Chapter One - The Importance of Saying “No”

Why Saying “No” Is So Difficult Why You Shouldn’t Cave In Stating Your Case Ending the Conversation Disengaging and the Importance of the Sooner-Rather-than-Later Rule Remaining Consistent Picking Your Battles with Easy Kids Picking Your Battles with Difficult Kids When Defeat Is Snatched from the Jaws of Victory Dealing with Back Talk Combating Disrespect When Double Standards Are Good

Chapter Two - Getting Your Teen to Do Anything

When Your Teen Doesn’t Feel Like It Dealing with Resistance The Power of Consequences The “I’ll Do It Later” Syndrome When They Don’t Do a Good Enough Job

Chapter Three - Communication

The Value of Shutting Up When and How to Shut Up The Secret of Good Listening Dealing with Uncommunicative Teens When Your Teen Doesn’t Listen to a Word You Say Dispensing Advice Respecting Their Nonsense Getting Back Control of the Conversation What to Do When Your Teen Throws You a Curve

Chapter Four - Building a Strong Relationship

The Business Parent vs. the Nurturing Parent Being with Teens When They Don’t Want to Be with You The Mood-Altering Power of Competing Melodies The Cure for Your Teen’s Allergy to You The Effects of a Helpful Attitude When Your Teen Is Oblivious to You The Unconditional Deal Adults as Flawed Beings A Different Kind of Strong Engaging in Friendly Teasing—When Your Teen Does It to You Engaging in Friendly Teasing—When You Do It to Your Teen The Parent as Friend Suffering as Leverage Losing It Little Words of Love

Chapter Five - Interpreting the Most Popular Teenage Phrases

“I Hate You” “You Just Want Somebody Who’s Perfect” “I Don’t Feel Well” “You’re Ruining My Life” “You Never . . . “I’m Sorry I’m Such a Disappointment to You” “It’s Not Fair” “Please, I’m Under a Lot of Stress; I Really Don’t Need This Now” “But All the Other Kids’ Parents Let Them” “But Why?”

Chapter Six - Rules and Controls

Setting Rules When Rules Are Broken Why Kids Break Rules Handling Confrontation Seeing Results Settling for Imperfect Control Dealing with Out-of-Control Teens The Truth about Lying

Chapter Seven - Character Development

Temporary Character Flaws Entitled Teens Spoiled Teens Inconsiderate Teens Oblivious Teens Why Is It Never Their Fault? Why Are They Always So Negative? Cultivating Manners Will They Ever Learn? When Your Teen Is Not Turning Out Like You Wanted The Perfect Child

Chapter Eight - Teens and Their Dilemmas

Parents as Helpers Reassuring a Teen Who Can’t Be Reassured What if Your Teen Is Depressed? What if Your Teen Gets into Trouble?

Chapter Nine - Teens and School

Education and Their Future Motivating Teenagers When Motivation Isn’t the Problem Sweeping Anxiety under the Rug Should You Let Them Fail? Getting Your Teen to Do Homework What, No Homework? Coping with Stress The Ultimate Leverage

Chapter Ten - Teens and Family

Between Parents Playing One Against the Other What’s Fair and What’s Not Sibling Bickering How to Deal with Divorce

Chapter Eleven - Teens and Sex

Risky Behavior What Parents Should Know How Active Is Your Teen? The Consequences of Teenage Sex Talking to Your Teen about Sex The Basics and Beyond Advice for Girls Advice for Boys More Advice for Boys Teenage Love If You Think Your Child Is Gay

Chapter Twelve - Teens, Drugs, and Alcohol

How Prevalent Is Substance Use? Where Do You Stand on Drinking? Where Do You Stand on Marijuana? Is It a Problem or Not? What Parents Can Do Talking to Teens about Drinking and Drugs Fostering Honesty What Not to Do Sharing Your Own Experiences The Single Greatest Risk Deterrent Understanding the Power of Substances

Chapter Thirteen - Teens and Electronics

A Minute in the Life What Do Kids Do Online? What Parents Worry about Most Parental Controls Secret Surveillance Guidelines for Teens Access to the World Multitasking Guys, Girls, and Video Games Productive vs. Nonproductive Time Staying Connected Setting Limits

Chapter Fourteen - The End of Adolescence

The Return of the Prodigal Child Seeing You for Who You Really Are The New Deal Is My Kid Going to Be Okay? Different Yet the Same

Acknowledgments Praise for I’d Listen to My Parents if They’d Just Shut Up Also by Anthony E. Wolf, Ph.D. About the Author Credits Copyright About the Publisher