Log In
Or create an account ->
Imperial Library
Home
About
News
Upload
Forum
Help
Login/SignUp
Index
Cover
Title
Dedication
Contents
Foreword
Introduction
Really Important Maps
The Canada Party Manifesto
1. America and Canada: Continental BFFs
1.1 Timeline of U.S.-Canadian History
1.2 Grok the Vote: Campaign Reform for Idiots
1.3 Making English the Official Language for Native English Speakers
1.4 Combining Our Cities: Welcome to Van Francisco, Dirty Hippie Capital of the World!
1.5 Understanding Hockey, from the Country That Gave You Football and Basketball
1.6 The Cameron Plan: America in 3D
1.7 How to Say You’re Sorry without Looking like a Total Pussy
2. It’s a Small World (Unless You’re Liechtenstein)
2.1 American Exceptionalism, or How to Make Other Countries Feel Bad about Their Bodies
2.2 Killing with Kindness, Torturing with Tenderness
2.3 Weaponizing Politeness: Fight like a Canadian!
2.4 Showing Nature Who’s Boss
2.5 Un-American Idol: How Reality Shows Can Stop Illegal Immigration
2.6 A Simple Solution for Integrating Our Indigenous Peoples
2.7 The Metric System: Exactly Ten Times More Awesome Than Imperial Units
3. The Irony of Being Ironic in a Post-Ironic Age
3.1 The Elitist Scourge: How to Hate People Who Are Better Than You
3.2 Citizens Divided: People Are Now Corporations
3.3 Thoughts on Relieving America’s Sexual Tension
3.4 The Question of: a) Education
3.5 Health Care: More Than Just a Dental Plan for Hockey Players
3.6 Helping Children Determine Their Value as Future Americans
3.7 Obesity: Big Thoughts on Big People
3.8 All We Are Saying Is Give Guns a Chance
3.9 Crime and Punishment, and then Crime Again
4. Treating Experts like Mammals
4.1 Grandpa Lost His Shins in the Big One: Our Statute of Limitations on Living Off Other People’s Sacrifices
4.2 What to Do with “the Gays”
4.3 You Are NOT the Father!
4.4 Media Libs
4.5 Weed. Sweet, Sweet Weed.
4.6 The Constitution, Annotated
4.7 Science vs. Religion
4.8 Living in Fear: The War of the Words
Appendix A: Some Handy Tear-Out Application Forms
Appendix B: Canadian Glossary
Acknowledgments
About the Authors
Copyright
← Prev
Back
Next →
← Prev
Back
Next →