Table of Contents

Cover

ENDORSEMENTS

Title page

Copyright page

DEDICATION

PREFACE TO THE SECOND EDITION

FOREWORD BY LUKE JOHNSON

INTRODUCTION

Fear of failure

The monkey on my back

A practitioner in failure

An addiction to self-help

PART ONE: What is Stopping You?

1 FEAR

Blind to office politics

Emotions and their role in survival

Impaired mental capacity

Experiments in emotional manipulation

Task perseverance, task avoidance

Mastery or ego orientation

Self-help books aimed at High-FFs

Dream fulfilment is a false promise

Avoidance behaviours

“Attribution theory” and the “locus of control”

2 EXTERNAL RESPONSES

Post-traumatic stress disorder

Daniel Goleman and high EQ

High-FFs are capable of emotional intelligence

Getting on top of our external responses

Anger as concealment and control

Frustration and anxiety

Depression is a thief

Taking responsibility

Focus on the present and future

3 FAILURE AS A POSITIVE EXPERIENCE

Failure is a question of interpretation

The link with low self-esteem

Reframing failure

Depersonalizing failure

Company failure is a transformed concept

“Fail better”

4 PRODUCING BETTER RESPONSES

Cognitive behavioural therapy

Start a diary

PART TWO: Goals

5 ACT

Circle of influence

Goals are a major differentiator

The grey zone

Avoiding avoidance goals

Setting the right goals

6 VISUALIZATION

NLP needs tempering

Visualization of goals

Parcelling up the 10-year goals

Lurid fantasies

Picking the right jungle

The Character Ethic

The principles come first

Our own constitution

A dynamic towards appropriate goal setting

Goal-setting may take several goes

7 LANGUAGE AND BEHAVIOUR

Write down your goals

Behave as if we are already there

Positive self-talk

Pre- and post-visualization exercises

The Reticular Activating System – our “antennae”

Luck and the winner’s curse

8 APPROPRIATE GOAL SETTING FOR RECOVERING HIGH-FFS

Setting the wrong goals can be fatal

Money’s diminishing returns

Setting goals beyond our goals

If we could have our goals now – would we?

Recognize the milestones

PART THREE: Execution

9 STRATEGY AND TACTICS

The strategic bridge

Advantages of a strategy

The strength of adopting “objectives, strategy, tactics”

The SWOT

A strategy based on strengths and opportunities

Be different

The “jumping out of the aeroplane” moment

The required fight

Rules for tactical execution

10 JUDGEMENT AND IDEAS

Judgement calls in three stages

The joy of crises

50:50s

The false hope of ideas

A technique for producing ideas

11 MANAGING THE PROCESS

Anyone can adopt efficient practices

Covey’s four activity boxes

Rethinking the notion of time

Create a timetable

Proactively managing interruptions

Clearing roadblocks

“Sharpening the saw”

“To do” lists and “checklists”

Deal with the worst thing first

Prioritization and efficiency

Endeavour is the key

PART FOUR: People

12 SELF-ESTEEM

People skills are vital

Low self-esteem – the distorting mirror

Deconstructing low self-esteem

The fight back

Judged by intentions, not actions

See the best in others

Spreading positivity

13 DEALING WITH THE BOSS

Three types of bad boss

The Pisstaker’s Charter

Developing better responses

Understand their weaknesses

Developing win–win situations

14 PROGRESS AS AN EMPLOYEE

Understand the organization

When opportunity knocks, open the door

Become the boss’s adviser

High-FFs and delegation

Commit to the organization

“Thank God it’s today”

15 NETWORKING AND INTERVIEWS

Forget playground experiences

Generating rapport

Networking potential

Networking don’ts

Should any openings come up . . . 

Dealing with interviews

Avoiding self-sabotage

16 LEADERSHIP

Leadership suits the High-FF

A new approach to leadership

The crucial ability: empathy

The paradox of success

One minute management

Make others feel important

Maslow’s hierarchy of needs

The hiring gambit

Spotting curious people

It won’t always work

Inspiring leadership

Motivating a team

Loyalty runs down the hierarchy, not up

Using High-FF traits to our advantage

PART FIVE: Me Inc.

17 THE HIGH-FF ENTREPRENEUR

The entrepreneurial myth

Traits for sustainability

Terror is unavoidable

18 ALTERNATIVE PATHS FOR THE HIGH-FF

“Partnerships don’t work”

Typical High-FF partnership failings

Towards strong partnering

When partnerships go wrong

The positive side of partnerships

Freelancing and consultancy work

The franchising alternative

Developing a mental autonomy

CONCLUSION – THE POINT OF RECOVERY

Quit obsessing

Be self-critical

In defence of melancholy

Choosing to serve

Empower others

SEVEN STEPS TO NAVIGATING FEAR OF FAILURE

Step One: Discover your true values

Step Two: Visualize your goals

Step Three: Develop the milestones

Step Four: Establish a strategy and some tactics

Step Five: Execute efficiently

Step Six: Deal with people

Step Seven: Find your unique gift

BIBLIOGRAPHY

ABOUT ROBERT KELSEY

Index